A loud peal of laughter drew Kiram's attention farther down the neat rows of graves. A lean young man dressed in the academy blue crouched on the mound of a grave. His black hair hung over his eyes and he shoved it back brusquely.
For an instant Kiram thought it was Javier and he was unreasonably glad to see him. But as soon as the thought came to him he discounted it. Javier never laughed like that. It had to be Fedeles.
As if to confirm Kiram's thought, the young man broke into wide grin and crowed out the names of several horses. Then he swung up a silver trowel and plunged it into the earthen mound of the grave. He hurled up a spray of dirt and mangled clover.
Alarm shot through Kiram as he realized that Fedeles was digging up a grave, desecrating the dead.
"Fedeles! You can't dig there."
Fedeles glanced briefly to Kiram but then returned to his work as if utterly unaware that he was breaking common Cadeleonian law. Kiram raced across the field, jumping over the low mounds where bodies lay. He reached Fedeles quickly but not before Fedeles had opened two large holes directly beneath the headstone. There were flowers all around Fedeles' feet. Most of them looked as if they had been recently ripped from the ground. Their roots still gripped dark clods of dirt. The name on the headstone was Victaro Irdad, the groom who had died the previous year.
"Firaj," Fedeles sang out to Kiram.
"What are you doing?"
"Flowers," Fedeles cooed and he stroked the head stone with a muddy hand. "Flowers for Victo. He won't see them but I brought them. I brought them." Fedeles' expression went slack and he leaned against the headstone allowing the trowel to fall aside.
Kiram remembered Nestor telling him that a groom had been torn to pieces. Secretly, everyone blamed Javier but no one had seen it happen. When Nestor had first told him the story, Kiram had simply accepted that Javier was responsible, but now he had seen how well Javier could restrain himself and the white hell. He couldn't believe that Javier had killed the groom, not even by accident.
But it unnerved him to think that someone had and that no one at the academy spoke of it.
"Was Victo a friend of yours?" Kiram asked Fedeles gently.
Fedeles dug into his jacket pocket and brought out a small wooden figurine of a horse. It fit in Fedeles's palm.
"Lunaluz," Fedeles said quietly. "I made it for Victo but he's gone now."
"You carved this?"
"Haldiim murdered him," Fedeles whispered the words through his gritted teeth.
"What?" Kiram couldn't quite believe what he thought Fedeles had said.
Fedeles' expression jerked again and for a moment he seemed unsure of where he was.
"I brought flowers for Victo." He turned away from Kiram and quickly gathered the uprooted flowers. He pushed them into the holes he had dug so that their roots were sticking up, exposed to the air and the blossoms were down in the dirt. "Victo can see them now."
"Fedeles," Kiram watched him closely, "you said something about Haldiim just now. What was it?"
Fedeles shook his head as if dismissing Kiram's question completely. He lay down on top of the grave and nestled his face into the red clover and earth. "I want to go."
"You should." Kiram straightened. "We both should."
"No," Fedeles replied. "I want to go down there. I want to tell him, I didn't mean it."
"You didn't mean what?"
"It's a secret." Fedeles rolled onto his side and gazed at Kiram. For a moment he looked calm, almost at ease. Kiram was always surprised by how strongly Fedeles resembled Javier when his features weren't contorted with grins and grimaces. The two of them could have easily passed for brothers.
"I shouldn't have told him." Fedeles closed his eyes and lay still.
"We can't stay here," Kiram said at last.
Fedeles opened his eyes and smiled as if he were only half-awake.
"Firaj." Fedeles patted the ground, inviting Kiram to sit down beside him.
In other circumstances, Kiram might have sat down with Fedeles and attempted to make some sense of his words. But today he had no desire to linger in a graveyard or risk being accused of disturbing the Cadeleonian dead.
He turned away.
"I'm leaving whether you come or not," Kiram called over his shoulder. He heard Fedeles scramble to his feet. By the time Kiram had reached the fence, Fedeles had fallen in alongside him. He gently nudged Kiram's elbow to get his attention.
"What?" Kiram tried not to sound annoyed but he wasn't sure he succeeded.
"Look." Fedeles stepped off the path and pushed aside the thick mass of wild grasses at the base of a tree. Kiram was surprised to see a small horse carved into the tree trunk.
It wasn't just a simple outline cut into the bark, but a delicate bas-relief, like something that he would have expected in a temple.
"That's really well done, Fedeles." Kiram looked at him. "Did you do it?"
"Yes." Fedeles grinned, looking genuinely pleased.
As they walked back to the academy Fedeles pointed out other carvings of his. All of them were small and hidden from casual sight. But they were each masterfully formed and not all of them were horses. Dogs and birds as well as a few tiny human figures peered down from the branches of trees and peeped out from knotholes.
Kiram smiled at one man who was clearly picking his nose.
"Does anyone else know about these?" Kiram asked. He thought Nestor would love them. Fedeles shook his head.
"It's a secret." Fedeles suddenly lowered his voice. "Keep secrets or you get killed."
Kiram frowned and would have asked why but Fedeles didn't give him the chance. He let out a gleeful howl and raced towards the dormitory where clusters of first-year students were lounging. The boys looked up at Fedeles and then scattered apart. They laughed and shrieked excitedly as Fedeles chased them around the grounds in a game of tag.
Forgotten by even Fedeles, Kiram slunk away to find Nestor.
Chapter Thirteen
Kiram found Nestor in the library, drawing as always, and settled down into a chair opposite him.
"Something bothering you?" Nestor asked.
Kiram nodded but didn't know exactly how to approach it. His encounter with Fedeles had been strange and troubling. To his relief Nestor didn't prod him. He waited patiently while Kiram gathered his thoughts.
"Can I ask you about Fedeles?" Kiram asked at last.
"What about him?"
"Is he." Kiram paused, weighing his words carefully. "Could he hurt someone?"
"On purpose?" Nestor raised his brows, as he met Kiram's gaze. "No. Never. He's simple and a little lost, but he couldn't harm a living soul. That's not in him, never has been, not even when he was.well. If you could have seen him before, you'd know. He was always speaking up for me -or anyone-when Javier and Elezar got too rough." Nestor shook his head sadly. "He was great fun. Everyone loved him."
"But he's not the same now."
"No, he's not. But under all that madness, he's still Fedeles. You can see it when he's with the horses and when he plays with the other boys. He's just not mean."
Kiram picked up a book that another student had left on the table; a slim volume of Bishop Seferino's musings. He still had not found the book that Javier had told him about, Concerning Ardor. Instead Kiram read through On the Nature of Vice and Virtue.
"Why do you ask?"
"He was putting flowers on that murdered groom's grave and saying…things."
"They were friends, up until.you know," Nestor said.