“Hell yes! You’re one of the few people I was hoping to see. I’m just shocked to see you here of all places.” Her love for you was overtly clear and it made me once again regret my earlier words.
“Yeah, I’m still paying an old debt, otherwise you wouldn’t have.” This was before I knew you would have attempted to walk across the Pacific Ocean had your sisters asked enough times. “You should quit with the cancer sticks, you’re too pretty, and you’ve got a great laugh without the guttural cough.”
“I’m working on it,” Jess replied.
You smiled in response, then turned to Jameson, your eyes were warm and sincere. “She may be a spitfire and a pain in the ass at times, but she’s worth it.” My focus fell on his arm as your hand brushed across it, wondering what your touch felt like before sensing your gaze was on me. You gave me a timid smile before walking away. My eyes followed you like half of the others that were crowded around the backyard.
“I love your pants, Ace. They make your ass look amazing!” Jess yelled to you, confirming the fact.
“Stop, you’re making me blush.”
Jess elbowed me playfully in the side. “Don’t worry, I know that’s what you were thinking.”
I quickly shook my head, “He’s the one obsessed with a Bosse.”
“I saw you checking her out, don’t lie.”
“She’s hot. I checked her out,” I admitted, “but I’m not about to sign up for drama and all of the shit that goes along with those girls.”
“So what you’re saying is that you don’t know Ace?”
“That’s what I fucking said when I realized that he’s lived beside them for the past ten years and has never spoken to them. I didn’t realize just how crazy he was until that moment.” Jameson clasped a hand to my shoulder and then walked away. I knew without asking he’d gone to check on you girls.
“How can you live beside her and never have spoken to her?” Jess’s voice was accusing.
“I’ve spoken to her!” I retorted, too aggressively due to my thoughts still being mangled. “Just not very much,” I amended when she gave me that look you’ve told me about, the one that she gives better than so many people that says ‘you’re full of shit.’
Jess laughed, shaking her head. “Seriously, Max, if Keith were still here, I sure as shit would be beating you off of her with a bat so he could sweep her up because she’s one of the best people I’ve ever met in my life. I’ve known her since we were five and I’ve never met someone nicer, sweeter, or more caring. To go with all that she’s funny as hell, smarter than you’ll believe, and she looks like that!” Her arm extended toward the door with emphasis. “What in the hell is wrong with you? Stop being an asshole before you ruin your chances. I can’t believe you told her to sleep with Nate fucking Hudson!”
I stared at her, working to suppress the borage of words that she’d managed to surface that wanted to both admit and deny my attraction to you. “Oh my God, you’re never going to make this work!” she growled.
“I don’t give a shit about her.”
“Then why are you out here listening to my advice?”
I ignored her question and changed the focus to why we’d never work. “She may be hot, but let’s face it, people that attend parties like this …” I looked around, shaking my head.
“Are you still dating your easy call girl?” You probably hate hearing this part the most, but Jess knew about Lacey.
“Why does that matter?”
“Challenge yourself, Max. We both know you’re never going to be happy with Lacey. And who are you to judge her for being here? You’re here too.”
“Dude, I thought you were coming! Ace is taking her home.” Jameson interrupted, saving me from having to tell another lie.
“That’s because Ace hates these parties,” Jess said factually. Her eyebrows raised like she was bored with me. “Didn’t you hear her, ‘paying a debt.’ She’s only attended like two parties here before. You don’t have a clue who she is.” She walked away from me as though I’d offended her.
“You’re talking to some chick about liking her before me?” Jameson’s eyes were wide with allegation. “Don’t look at me like that, you dick. I know you like Ace.”
I shook my head again and started heading toward the house. “It would never work. Let’s get out of here.”
We made it to the driveway and those damn bright yellow pants caught my attention again. Jameson attempted to hurry after you when Kendall slid slightly on the gravel, but you had her. Sometimes I think those narrow shoulders of yours carried the weight of all of your sisters and you never showed the slightest strain. I grabbed his arm to slow him down once again.
“He didn’t fight for me, Ace,” Kendall whined, leaning further against you.
Your voice was much quieter, and harder to hear with your back to us, “I think he was a little caught off guard.” You pried a Solo cup from Kendall’s hand and left it next to half a dozen other ones while still holding most of her weight.
“He doesn’t like me,” Kendall insisted.
“He likes you. You’re just turning him in circles. I don’t think he knows which way is up right now.”
“You really think he likes me?”
“I do.” Jameson’s body visibly relaxed at your words.
We stood at the head of the driveway, watching as you two weaved down the driveway.
“I also think these shoes are really difficult to walk in with you when you’re drunk.”
Kendall giggled, catching the attention of a couple of guys that were cutting through the yard. Did you hear them whistle at you guys? They wanted to catch your attention, but neither of you turned.
“Those are great shoes.” Kendall seemed oblivious to the guys, that or so used to it, it didn’t even faze her. “I love you too, Ace.”
“I love you too,” Your words were a whisper at this point as you veered once again as Kendall changed her course with a giggle.
Jameson was still itching to go help. I used to think his need to help women derived from growing up with his older sister that always sounded like such a pain in the ass from the stories he shared, but truth was, J just always wanted to help everyone.
“I’m glad you’re breaking up with Eric. He doesn’t deserve you.”
When you guys disappeared behind a large SUV, Jameson did a fist pump. “We just won the mother fucking lottery!”
I was still scared shitless, but he was right. We had.
Each time we hung out over the next few weeks, I felt my draw to be near you grow, even as we played that damn hot and cold game. I hated that you dated Eric, your bastard of a boyfriend so long. It made me feel desperate to deny my feelings. Yet each time I was around you I felt myself working to earn your smile—not the polite one. I’m now aware from spending time around your mom that your casual smile is a trait you inherited from her, it was probably even imposed on you. I didn’t give a shit about those smiles; you handed them out to anyone. I strived for the ones that made your lips stretch so far your nose crinkled slightly, and that small dimple above the corner of your left lip appeared. I found myself growing jealous of Kyle and your dad as strange as that sounds, because they received that smile constantly with little effort.
It’s been two weeks since the funeral. David’s parents returned to France this morning, and are the last of the extended family to leave. The Bosse driveway has been packed with cars over the last couple of weeks. Now, as I bring the garbage can to the curb, I notice how desolate it looks with only Mindi and Kyle’s van.