“What about him?” I ask.
“Well, you still like him, don’t you?”
I open my mouth to say, No, of course not, why would I like someone who played me like that? but then I realize . . . I do still like him. For some strange reason, I haven’t given up on him, not entirely.
“Ugh,” I say instead. I can’t tell if I’m disgusted at him or at myself.
“That’s what I thought,” she says. “You’re not very good at hiding your emotions.”
“I don’t want to talk about it, okay? Not right now.” I glance around. Although the other kids are all intent on their practice, the music isn’t loud enough to drown out the conversation. I know it’s no better than school—they’re probably listening in, waiting to have something to gossip about later. “Anyway, what’s the plan for the routine? We’ve only got two days.”
“Well,” she says, doing a quick spin in place and just making the next catch. “I was inspired by your singing last night.”
“I’m not singing,” I interrupt quickly.
“No, no,” she continues, “I meant more your moves. I think we should choreograph something, make it more of a dance and less of a normal juggling routine. I mean, how often do you see two chicks juggling together?”
“I don’t know,” I say. “I’m guessing the question was rhetorical, so probably not very often.”
“Practically never,” she replies. “Normally it’s just guys who do partner juggling. Girls are expected to be pretty gymnasts and wear sparkles.”
“I thought you liked sparkles,” I say.
“Sure, when I want to be wearing them. Otherwise, it’s the patriarchy, man.”
I laugh. “Okay, okay, so to fight patriarchy we’re going to do a dance juggling routine.”
“Yep!”
“I don’t see how that helps any.”
“It probably doesn’t,” she says with a shrug. “But that doesn’t mean it hurts to try! If nothing else, it will keep your mind off things.”
“Wait . . . this isn’t just some grand scheme of yours to get Branden back for me, is it?”
She gives me her most innocent, winning smile.
“Me? Scheme? Jennifer, it’s like you don’t even know me.”
“Oh, I do,” I say with a laugh. “And that’s precisely why I’m asking.”
She just keeps smiling and changes up the juggling pattern. I don’t ask her again, but I’ve got a funny feeling I already know the answer.
Chapter
Nineteen
By the end of that afternoon’s practice, we have the rough skeleton of an act. Which is good, since according to our instructors, we’ll have only one more session to practice our act before everything gets put together for the first run-through tomorrow afternoon. So, a few more hours to fine-tune, and then we get to practice with the rest of the camp. Then it’s showtime.
“I can’t believe it’s almost over,” I tell Riley as we walk to the cafeteria.
“I know,” she says. “Stupid spring break not being long enough. But don’t worry, we’ll all still be in touch. This is just the beginning!”
In spite of her enthusiasm, I still feel low. I was getting used to the circus life—up early for breakfast and training, practicing all day, and hanging out with friends every night. It’s going to be really hard to go back to normal school after this.
As we’re heading back in, one of the acro boys I’ve seen hanging out with Branden jogs past. His short brown hair kind of glimmers in the sunlight.
“Hey, you’re Jenn, right?” he asks, turning around and keeping pace.
“Yeah,” I answer.
“You were awesome last night.” He gives me a grin. “You’ve got a great voice. Anyway, I’ll see you around.”
Once he’s turned around and headed into the cafeteria, I turn to Riley and give her my what was that all about? look.
“Looks like someone’s making new friends,” she says, wiggling her eyebrows.
I laugh. She loops an arm around my shoulder. “Kinda nice living in the spotlight for once, isn’t it?”
I nod. “Especially when it’s not for something embarrassing.”
“Just wait until the end of our act,” she says, giving me a squeeze. “It’s going to blow everyone out of the water.”
“You’re really optimistic.”
“Nope, I’m a realist. I just know.”
We’re in line by that point; the cafeteria is already filled with the other troupers, all of them looking a little winded and tired. But there’s an energy here, an excitement, and I’m not certain if it’s because we’re about to go see a professional circus or because we’re all part of one. I glance over and see Branden sitting at a table with his other acro friends. He’s facing away, so he doesn’t see me, but I still look away immediately. Riley catches my gaze.
“Ignore him,” she says. “He’ll realize he made a big mistake soon enough. Maybe even in time for the dance tomorrow night.”
“So much for being a realist,” I say. She doesn’t respond.
We grab our dinner and head over to where Tyler and Kevin are already sitting. They seem deep in discussion, but when I sit down, it’s clear they’re talking about routines.
“I just don’t know if we’re going to have enough time,” Kevin says.
“Time for what?” Riley asks.
“He wants to do a duo act. Hand-to-hand.” Kevin doesn’t seem very excited about it.
“I just think it would be fun,” Tyler says. “You’ve already admitted to basing acro before, and I can easily handstand off you. All you need to do is not move.”
“Sounds fun. And dangerous,” I say. “Are you going to do a full act?” Because if my little experience has shown me anything, it’s that these routines take loads of time.
“No way,” Tyler replies. “The acro group is doing a big finale sort of thing after our individual acts. I just thought it’d be kind of cool to do some hand-to-hand during it. No one else is.”
“No one else could,” Kevin says with a smile. “Fine, twist my arm. I’ll do it.”
Tyler hugs him. “I knew you would! There’s a hand-to-hand act tonight that I’m hoping we can steal some tricks from.”
“Um, I don’t think I’m comfortable doing tricks you haven’t tried before.”
“Well then, we’ll just borrow some choreography or something. Speaking of,” Tyler says, turning to Riley and me, “have you two decided what you’re going to do yet?”
I don’t even have time to open my mouth and respond; Riley immediately launches into her grand plans for our act, including the music and a few moves she credits to Tyler.
“It’s going to be fabulous,” she finishes. “We tried some of the choreo this afternoon, and it fits with the passes perfectly.”
“Do we have a theme yet?” I ask, because I can’t imagine them doing a full show without any sort of story line.
“It’s going to be really loose,” Kevin says. “I overheard some of the coaches talking. They’ll announce the official theme tomorrow, but I guess it’s just going to be something like Space Exploration.”
“Oh man, I hope so.” Riley’s eyes practically glow. “We could do our routine in space go-go outfits, kinda like in The Jetsons.”
I laugh. “I don’t own a go-go outfit. And I only watched The Jetsons, like, once.”
She shrugs. “I’m sure the costume department will have something.”
At that moment, someone slams into my back, making me spill the glass of milk I was holding all over my tray.
“What the—,” I begin, then cut off when I hear Megan’s snicker. I’m also pretty certain I hear Sara mutter, “Really, Megan?” I try to take a deep, calming breath, but Riley beats me to the punch. Almost literally.
“Watch it,” she warns, jumping to her feet. Her hands are clenched into fists, and she’s glaring at Megan with spite in her eyes.