“Good,” he says, the corner of his mouth curling up. “We should get to bed. I have a feeling Wade is going to keep us busy tomorrow.”
“I can hardly wait.”
“Your sarcasm is one of the things I like about you. I never know what is going to come out of that mouth of yours, yet I expect something.”
“Can you guess what I’m going to say now?” I ask staring up into his mischievous eyes.
“No, but I know I want to hear it.”
I lift up on my tiptoes and kiss him softly. It wasn’t meant to linger, but it does. I feel stuck to him and don’t want to let go. I pull away hesitantly. “Good night.”
Turning my back to him, I fumble with my key card. It’s not a hard task by any means but I can feel his eyes burning into my back.
“Do you need help with that?”
A shiver runs down my back as his warm breath hits my neck. “I’d be okay if you weren’t staring at me.”
“Here,” he says, slipping the key out from between my fingers.
He unlocks the door easily, holding it open for me to go inside. When the door clicks shut, he’s standing in my room, staring at me.
“What are you doing?” I ask, startled.
He leans back, resting the sole of his expensive shoe against the wall. “You don’t really want to sleep alone in this big room do you?”
“Pierce—”
He shakes his head. “Let me hold you. Nothing else.”
Words want to fall from my lips, but I consider them carefully. There have been way too many forks in the road for me lately, and I’m getting so tired of having to pick my way. “Can I trust you?” I finally ask, feeling my heart pound against my chest.
What he’s offering could be the start of something perfect, or it could just be the next in a line of bad decisions I’ve made.
Without words, he walks to me, cupping my face in his cool hands. I can do nothing but look at him. He’s gorgeous and successful—a dream for most women.
But, is he my dream?
He kisses me tenderly on the forehead then stares down into my eyes. “I think you should let me stay and find out.”
I nod, mostly because I’m not ready for the night to end. Because I do trust him. Because he’s never been anything other than good to me. And mostly because I want him to stay.
“Go get changed for bed and do whatever it is you do. I’m going to run across the hall and grab a few things.”
“Here,” I say, handing him a key. “I want you to trust me, too.”
He smiles, his lips curling up in that way that gets me every time. A woman could fall in love with that smile, shower in it forever, and he’d never have to say a word.
My heart beats rapidly as I fumble through my suitcase looking for pajamas. The silk camisole I usually wear during the summer months doesn’t feel right, and it’s literally all I brought for bed. Pierce might get the wrong idea if I go there.
After a couple minutes of staring at the pile of clothes I’d brought with only a business trip in mind, I decide on a pair of black cotton running shorts and a tank top that says “Catch Me If You Can” which I’d planned on wearing for my morning workout. Not that I ever crawl out of bed early enough to make that happen.
There’s a knock at the door just as I finish brushing my teeth. Here goes nothing, I think to myself after one last look in the mirror. It’s time, Lila. It’s time to let him go.
When I see him standing outside the bathroom door, I’m startled at first, but then I remember the key I handed him, and all the fear washes away. His hair is mussed up, probably from pulling his clothes off. My eyes wander down, passing by the smile I’d just admired minutes ago to his muscular chest. No shirt. Fuck me.
My gaze passes the sculpture I probably admired a little too long down to his black athletic shorts. Great minds think alike, I guess.
“Are we going to stand here all night or are you going to let me take you to bed?” he asks, his voice sounding tired.
I find his eyes, and my voice at the same time. “I’m too tired to stand here so I guess we’ll have to go with the second option.”
He grins. “Good.”
Dear God, help me.
Without warning, he lifts me into his strong arms and starts toward the bed.
“What are you doing?” I ask, feeling my nerves kick into overtime again.
“I read your shirt and decided to accept the challenge.”
He sits me on the edge of the bed and pulls the covers back. “If we were running—like really running—you wouldn’t be able to catch me.”
“Really?” he asks, lifting a brow. I bet he runs, and I bet he does it often.
He motions for me to crawl under the covers. I continue my meaningless chatter. “Yeah, I run a few times a year at least. Usually when I’m pissed off and need time to think.”
I slowly make my way toward the pillows. “I went out for cross country in high school and didn’t make it past week one. It wasn’t that I couldn’t do it, I just didn’t like to be told to run and where and how long. But if I really want to, I can run. I can run really fast. Once—”
“Lila,” Pierce interrupts, “Tonight, I’m going to lie in this bed next to you. I’m going to wrap my arms as tightly around you as I can without smothering you. I may cover your legs with mine, and I may bury my nose in your scented hair just to remind myself who I’m with if I wake up in the middle of the night and think this is just another dream. If you’d like, I’ll even give you another goodnight kiss, but Lila, we’re not going past that. I want to take this slow. I want to know that you’re with me every step of the way. Are we clear?”
I nod, speechless. He always seems to know exactly what to say even when I don’t know what it is I need to hear. He’s the period to my sentence, and sometimes I can’t believe that he wants anything to do with me after what I put him through.
As I lay my cheek on the pillow, I watch him climb in next to me, taking a second to push the button that turns the lamp off. Only the city lights illuminate the room now. We lie facing each other. No words, just eyes reading the other’s thoughts. The position makes it impossible to think of anything but this. We might as well be in our own little world.
I think we are.
“What are you thinking about?” he whispers, gently caressing my jaw line.
“You. It’s hard to consider anything else. What about you? What are you thinking about?”
His eyes close briefly, and when he opens them, they speak of something different—hope, desire, hesitancy—it’s all there. “Have you ever dreamt of something knowing it would never happen?”
I pause, thinking back to things I probably shouldn’t be thinking about right now. After Blake left, I dreamt for days that he’d come back. I prayed for it, but he never did. And then there’s the whole idea of happily ever after … I think that’s all a dream now too. The whole exercise of thinking makes me feel like the Lila who has existed the last several months so I push it all away. “Of course,” I whisper.
“Have any of them come true?”
I shake my head. “No.”
His fingers move up, tracing subtle lines across my cheek to my lips. “Mine is right now. It’s amazing and scary at the same time.”
“Why is it scary?”
He replaces his fingertips with his mouth, giving me a kiss that feels like a gust of air against my lips. He pulls away just enough to speak. “Because I’m afraid I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning, and it’s all going to be a dream again.”
The pit that’s been lodged in my stomach since Blake left puts an end to its short-lived vacation. I’m at a point where I can’t make promises to myself, let alone someone else.
“I’m incapable of commitment right now, Pierce.”
“Can you promise me a chance?”
“I wouldn’t be here right now if I couldn’t,” I answer honestly.
His warm lips brush my forehead. “That’s all I need.”