“What did you say?” Blay repeated.
“You heard me.”
When there was no reply, no cursing, nothing thrown in terms of punches or objects, Qhuinn turned around.
After a moment, Blay crossed his arms, not around his chest, but his middle, as if he were vaguely nauseated.
Qhuinn scrubbed his face and spoke in a broken voice. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry….I don’t want this for you.”
Blay shook himself. “What…” Those blue eyes focused. “That’s why you attacked him?”
Qhuinn took a step forward. “I’m sorry…I just…he came in through the door and I caught the scent, and I just lost it. I wasn’t even thinking.”
Blay blinked, like maybe he was getting confronted with a foreign concept.
“That’s why you…why the hell would you do that?”
Qhuinn took another step forward, and then forced himself to stop—in spite of an almost overwhelming need to get close to the guy. And as Blay shook his head like he was having problems understanding all of it, Qhuinn didn’t mean to speak.
But he did. “Do you remember down in the clinic, well over a year ago…” He pointed to the floor, like, in case the guy had forgotten where the training center was. “It was before you and Saxton first…” Right. No finishing that one, not if he wanted to keep down all that food he’d eaten. “Remember what I told you?”
As Blay seemed confused, he helped the guy out. “I told you that if anyone ever hurt you, I would hunt them down and leave them for the sun?” Even he heard the way his voice dropped to a menacing growl. “Saxton hurt you tonight, so I did what I said I was going to do.”
Blay rubbed his face with his hand. “Jesus…”
“I told you what was going to happen. And if he does that again, I can’t promise you I won’t finish the job.”
“Look, Qhuinn, you can’t…you can’t be doing that shit. You just can’t.”
“Don’t you care? He was unfaithful. That’s not okay.”
Blay exhaled long and slow, like he was tired of carrying a weight. “Just…don’t do that again.”
Now Qhuinn was the one shaking his head. He didn’t get it. If he were in a relationship with Blay, and Blay stepped out on him? He’d never get over it.
God, why hadn’t he taken advantage of what he’d been offered? He shouldn’t have run. He should have stayed put.
Unbidden, his feet took another step forward. “I’m sorry….”
All of a sudden, he was saying those words over and over again, repeating them with each footfall that brought him closer to Blay.
“I’m sorry….I’m sorry….I’m…sorry….” He didn’t know what the fuck he was saying or doing; he just had an urgency to repent for all his sins.
There were so many when it came to this honorable male who was standing dead still before him.
Finally, there was only one step left before his bare chest hit Blay’s.
Qhuinn’s voice dropped to a whisper. “I’m sorry.”
In the thick silence that followed, Blay’s mouth parted…but not in surprise. More like he couldn’t breathe.
Reminding himself not to be a world-revolves-around-me asshole, Qhuinn brought it back to what was happening between Blay and Saxton.
“I don’t want that for you,” he said, his eyes roaming around that face. “You’ve suffered enough, and I know you love him. I’m sorry….I’m so sorry….”
Blay just stood in front of him, his expression frozen, his eyes darting around as if they couldn’t light on anything. But he didn’t pull back, jerk away, storm off. He stayed…right where he was.
“I’m sorry.”
Qhuinn watched from a vast distance as his own hand reached out and touched Blay’s face, the fingertips running over the five o’clock shadow. “I’m sorry.”
Oh, God, to touch him. To feel the warmth of his skin, to inhale his clean, masculine scent.
“I’m sorry.”
What the fuck was he doing? Man…too late to answer that—he was reaching forward with his other hand and putting the palm on that heavy shoulder.
“I’m sorry.”
Oh, God, he was drawing Blay in, pulling that body up against his own. “I’m sorry.”
He moved one of his hands to the nape of Blay’s neck and pushed it deep into the thick hair that curled under there. “I’m sorry.”
Blay was stiff, that spine straight as an arrow, his arms remaining around his tight belly. But after a moment, almost as if he were confused by his own reaction, the male began to lean in, that weight shifting subtly at first, and then more so.
With a quick jerk, Qhuinn wrapped his arms around the single most important person in his life. It was not Layla, although he felt a pang at that denial. It was not John, or his king. It wasn’t the Brothers.
This male was his reason for everything.
And even though it killed him that Blay was in love with someone else, he’d fucking take this. It had been too long since he’d touched the guy…and never like this.
“I’m sorry.”
Palming the back of Blay’s head, he urged the male closer to him, tucking that face into his own neck. “I’m sorry.”
As Blay went with it, Qhuinn shuddered, turning his own face inward, breathing in fully, pulling all of the sensations deep into his brain so he could remember this forever. And while his palm rubbed up and down, soothing that muscled back, he did what he could to make amends for so much more than his cousin’s infidelity. “I’m sorry—”
With a quick shift, Blay shook his head. Shook himself free. Pushed back.
Pushed away.
Qhuinn’s shoulders dropped. “I’m sorry.”
“Why do you keep saying that?”
“Because…”
In that moment, as their eyes met, Qhuinn knew it was time. He’d blown so much with Blay; there had been so many missteps and deliberate misunderstandings, so many years, so many denials—all on his part. He’d pussied out for so long, but that was over.
As he opened his mouth to speak the three words on his tongue, Blay’s eyes grew hard. “I don’t need your help, okay? I can take care of myself.”
Pound. Pound. Pound.
His heart was thumping so loud, he wondered if it was going to explode.
“You’re going to stay with him,” Qhuinn said numbly. “You’re going to—”
“You don’t pull that shit with Saxton—not ever again. Swear to it.”
Even though it killed him, Qhuinn was powerless to deny the guy anything. “Okay.” He lifted his palms. “Hands off.”
Blay nodded, the deal sealed.
“I just want to help you,” Qhuinn said. “That’s all.”
“You can’t,” Blay countered.
God, even though they were once again at odds, he craved more contact—and abruptly, he saw the pathway to exactly that. Tricky proposition, but at least there was some internal logic to it.
His arms lifted, his hands seeking, finding, latching on. Blay’s shoulders. Blay’s neck.
Sex surged in him, hardening his cock, making him pant. “But I can help you.”
“How?”
Qhuinn edged in close, bringing his mouth right to Blay’s ear. Then he deliberately put his bare chest against Blay’s. “Use me.”
“What?”
“Teach him a lesson.” Qhuinn tightened his hold and tilted Blay’s head back. “Pay him back the right way. With me.”
To make things crystal clear, Qhuinn extended his tongue and ran it up the side of Blay’s throat.
The hiss in response was loud as a curse.
Blay punched into him, shoving him back. “Have you lost your fucking mind?”
Qhuinn cupped his heavy, hard sex. “I want you. And I’ll take you any way I can—even if it’s only to get back at my cousin.”
Blay’s expression played table tennis between utter disbelief and epic anger.