He stopped and looked at her. “City money?”
“Yes, sir. Last year, the city generously funded the library at a level of—”
“But that was before Councilman Bentley organized his group to punish politicians who spend money.”
“Yes, sir, but the library provides far more value than the small amount of funding we ask.”
“But Councilman Bentley will withdraw his endorsement if I push for more spending. You do know that this is an election year? Statewide, almost all offices are up for grabs in just a few months. Governor, congressmen. Me.”
“Maybe he’ll stand by you, sir.” Serenity swallowed hard. “Surely Councilman Bentley knows what a fine statesman you are for the city of Maddington. I think he’ll respect your leadership.” She swallowed again. “The people certainly do.”
The mayor struck a visionary pose. “Mayor Johnson is the man to lead Maddington into a proud future.”
Serenity brightened. “So, if we request that the council restore full funding for the library, we have your support?”
“Absolutely. As long as it doesn’t cost any money.”
“Well, sir, the original budget had a little more than the proposed budget has. Really, just a little more.”
He beamed. “That’s the beauty of Maddington democracy under Mayor Weatherford Johnson. Any citizen can propose anything they like, tonight at the council meeting. If the council approves, why, I’ll be all behind it.”
“But you won’t speak in support, sir.”
The smile took on a crocodile quality. “You don’t need my help.”
“Uh, thank you, I guess, sir. There is one other small thing. We’d like to propose a small, no-cost accounting juggle to help the library get past a short-term problem. You can do it without the council’s approval.”
“Certainly. As long as Councilman Bentley doesn’t oppose it.”
Serenity stood up and slumped to the door. With her hand on the knob, she turned back and thought she might as well be talking to the Monopoly man. “Sir, have you ever considered wearing a black top hat?”
The mayor beamed. “You think it would make me look like Lincoln?”
nine
how do you shelve an ak-47?
SERENITY STARED at the blank page.
How the hell do politicians do this?
She sat at her desk working on her speech for that night’s city council meeting. Every word counted.
Of course, that meant that no words would come to mind. The notepad in front of her was still blank after an hour.
Start with anything. She remembered Natalie Goldberg’s first rule for writing and sex: Keep your hand moving.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” she wrote.
Then she scratched that out. There were no women on the present council.
“Gentlemen.”
Well, hell, there would be women in the audience. Leaving them out was just plain rude, so she scratched that line out, too.
Back to “Ladies and gentlemen.”
Is it reverse sexist to put women first? Scratched that out.
Faulkner was perched on the table at her elbow, twitching his whiskers.
“What the hell are you looking at?” she said. He didn’t budge.
“Arrogant bastard,” she muttered. Then she threw her arms at him and screamed, “Aargh!”
He still didn’t budge. But, the man standing in her doorway squeaked.
She looked up to see a man in full camo gear. He was an older man, with a white ponytail and a Vietnam Veteran ball cap with small holly branches attached to it, presumably for more camouflage.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “Can I help you?”
He jerked his chin at the nameplate by the door. “You the librarian?”
“Yes, sir.”
“The head librarian?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Don’t want to talk to nobody but the head librarian.”
“That’d be me, sir.”
He stepped in and closed the door behind him. She opened her mouth to stop him but decided, what the hell.
He looked at Faulkner. “You got a mascot.”
“Appears that way.”
“Pets are good.”
She nodded. “How can I help you, sir?”
He swung a duffel bag off his back and reached in. When he withdrew his hand, at first it looked like he had a black pipe in his hand, but then Serenity recognized it as an automatic rifle.
“Holy shit!” She froze. Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm.
He stood there with the gun in his hand and a crazy look in his eye and said, “Think the library can help me, ma’am?”
She forced herself to stop staring. Her eyes fell on a mug with the words keep calm and ask a librarian.
“We help everyone, sir. You’ve come to the right place.” Silently, she wondered if they had a book on how to disarm a maniac. If not, she needed to order one, for next time. If there was a next time.
“That’s what I heard. People say this library handles everything.”
He shifted the rifle and Serenity looked for something to throw but he set the weapon down on her desk before she could move. Then he stepped back, his back straight in a remembered posture from fifty years ago. “AK. Took it off a dead Viet Cong. Now that we’re friends with those little yellow bastards, I thought it would be right to try to give it back to his owner. Or at least his family.”
He reached for the rifle. Serenity jumped up and pinned it with both hands.
“Here.” He touched the barrel. “Some kind of gook writing. And a number. Somebody, somewhere ought to be able to tell who it was issued to. I know this ain’t exactly a book of Shakespeare, but I don’t know where else to go and you’re—”
Serenity finished, “The librarian. Yeah.”
“So, I thought I’d let you write down the numbers and shit, see what you could find.”
Serenity looked into his tired, crazy eyes and pressed down harder on the rifle. “I need to hold onto this, sir. To find the owner.”
He thought about it a minute and nodded. “Tired of carrying the damned thing around for fifty years.”
He disappeared from the doorway and was gone.
Serenity picked up the rifle and held it in front of Faulkner.
“Maybe I need to take this to the council meeting tonight. Maybe this will be my rectal thermometer.”
For lack of any better place, she shoved it behind a filing cabinet. Then she looked back at Faulkner. “What? I’ll tell Joe about it tonight and get MPD to come get it. I don’t have time to deal with this now. And it’s not like you know where to shelve an AK-47.”
ten
big man cowering
THEY RODE in Joe’s city-supplied car, a vicious-looking black Charger with a police bubble on the dash, and the radio and computer separating him and Serenity. Serenity was muttering to herself and fidgeting with the button to roll the window up and down. The hot summer evening air would roar in for a moment and turn the car into a sauna. Then the window would go up and the full-blast air conditioner would freeze them.
Joe said nothing, which was probably a good thing, but it didn’t protect him.
Serenity left the window up and turned on him. “What the hell is wrong with you men?”
He said nothing and it still didn’t help him.
“I mean, you either want to screw us all, either literally with a rectal thermometer or figuratively with your politics. Or, you are completely clueless and not worth the time it takes to talk to you.”
Since silence wasn’t working, Joe said, “In fairness, it’s not just men. Remember Councilwoman Margaret Wardzinski? Ever try to talk to her?”