Dearest Mumm and Dad,
Well here is Amazing news for, I am now Captain!! It has been a very busy and vareid Week all round as, I shall now recount …
And only one thing more …
There was a large house in one of the nicer areas of Ankh, with a spacious garden with a children’s treehouse in it and, quite probably, a warm spot by the fire.
And a window, breaking …
Gaspode landed on the lawn, and ran like hell towards the fence. Flower-scented bubbles streamed off his coat. He was wearing a ribbon with a bow on it, and carrying in his mouth a bowl labelled MR HUGGY.
He dug his way frantically under the fence and squirmed into the road.
A fresh pile of horse droppings took care of the floral smell, and five minutes of scratching removed the bow.
‘Not a bloody flea left,’ he moaned, dropping the bowl. ‘An’ I had nearly the complete set. Whee-ooo! I’m well out of that. Huh!’
Gaspode brightened up. It was Tuesday. That meant steak-and-suspicious-organs pie at the Thieves’ Guild, and the head cook there was known to be susceptible to a thumping tail and a penetrating stare. And holding an empty bowl in your mouth and looking pathetic was a sure-fire winner, if Gaspode was any judge. It shouldn’t take too long to claw off MR HUGGY.
Perhaps this wasn’t the way it ought to be. But it was the way it was.
On the whole, he reflected, it could have been a lot worse.
THE END
About the Author
Terry Pratchett is the acclaimed creator of the Discworld series, started in 1983 with The Colour of Magic, and which has now reached 38 novels. Worldwide sales of his books are now 60 million, and they have been translated into 37 languages. Terry Pratchett was knighted for services to literature in 2009.
Introducing Discworld
The Discworld Series is a continuous history of a world not totally unlike our own except that it is a flat disc carried on the backs of four elephants astride a giant turtle floating through space, and that it is peopled by, among others, wizards, dwarves, policemen, thieves, beggars, vampires and witches. Within the history of Discworld there are many individual stories, which can be read in any order, but reading them in sequence can increase your enjoyment through the accumulation of all the fine detail that contributes to the teeming imaginative complexity of this brilliantly conceived world.
Books by Terry Pratchett
Have you read them all?
1. THE COLOUR OF MAGIC
2. THE LIGHT FANTASTIC
3. EQUAL RITES
4. MORT
5. SOURCERY
6. WYRD SISTERS
7. PYRAMIDS
8. GUARDS! GUARDS!
9. ERIC (illustrated by Josh Kirby)
10. MOVING PICTURES
11. REAPER MAN
12. WITCHES ABROAD
13. SMALL GODS
14. LORDS AND LADIES
15. MEN AT ARMS
16. SOUL MUSIC
17. INTERESTING TIMES
18. MASKERADE
19. FEET OF CLAY
20. HOGFATHER
21. JINGO
22. THE LAST CONTINENT
23. CARPE JUGULUM
24. THE FIFTH ELEPHANT
25. THE TRUTH
26. THIEF OF TIME
27. THE LAST HERO (illustrated by Josh Kirby)
28. THE AMAZING MAURICE & HIS EDUCATED RODENTS (for younger readers)
29. NIGHT WATCH
30. THE WEE FREE MEN (for younger readers)
31. MONSTROUS REGIMENT
32. A HAT FULL OF SKY (for younger readers)
33. GOING POSTAL
34. THUD!
35. WINTERSMITH (for younger readers)
36. MAKING MONEY
37. UNSEEN ACADEMICALS
38. I SHALL WEAR MIDNIGHT (for younger readers)
THE SCIENCE OF DISCWORLD (with Ian Stewart and Jack Cohen)
THE SCIENCE OF DISCWORLD II: THE GLOBE (with Ian Stewart and Jack Cohen)
THE SCIENCE OF DISCWORLD III:
DARWIN’S WATCH (with Ian Stewart and Jack Cohen)
THE NEW DISCWORLD COMPANION (with Stephen Briggs)
NANNY OGG’S COOKBOOK (with Stephen Briggs, Tina Hannan and Paul Kidby)
THE PRATCHETT PORTFOLIO (with Paul Kidby)
THE DISCWORLD ALMANAK (with Bernard Pearson)
THE UNSEEN UNIVERSITY CUT-OUT BOOK (with Alan Batley and Bernard Pearson)
WHERE’S MY COW? (illustrated by Melvyn Grant)
THE ART OF DISCWORLD (with Paul Kidby)
THE WIT AND WISDOM OF DISCWORLD (compiled by Stephen Briggs)
THE FOLKLORE OF DISCWORLD (with Jacqueline Simpson)
Discworld Maps
THE STREETS OF ANKH-MORPORK (with Stephen Briggs, painted by Stephen Player)
THE DISCWORLD MAPP (with Stephen Briggs, painted by Stephen Player)
A TOURIST GUIDE TO LANCRE — A DISCWORLD MAPP (with Stephen Briggs, illustrated by Paul Kidby)
DEATH’S DOMAIN (with Paul Kidby)
A complete list of Terry Pratchett ebooks and audio books as well as other books based on the Discworld series — illustrated screenplays, graphic novels, comics and plays — can be found on www.terrypratchett.co.uk
THE DARK SIDE OF THE SUN
STRATA
THE UNADULTERATED CAT (illustrated by Gray Jolliffe)
GOOD OMENS (with Neil Gaiman)
THE CARPET PEOPLE
TRUCKERS
DIGGERS
WINGS
ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND (see www.ifnotyouthenwho.com
JOHNNY AND THE DEAD
JOHNNY AND THE BOMB
NATION