Yes, sir. I guess I do look young for my age. My mother thinks I’m still in my teens.
Ah, haha. You have a mother. Of course. They always think so, don’t they? Might be a problem, though, managing a class, keeping discipline, that line of things, what do you think, Mort?
Very possibly. Yes, sir. Well observed.
But now we are getting ahead of ourselves. Mr.… ah … Skizzen, this meeting is merely—. What sort of name is that, may I inquire?
It’s German.
German?
Austrian.
Hear that, Clare, Austrian.
Viennese.
Viennese! But I know that, don’t I, from your CV. What I asked was what does it mean?
I believe it refers to … means … is a … sketch, sir. Plural. Yes, the plural. Sketches.
There’s many of you, then. Morton here we call Salty Wash. Out of our dear love, of course. The students are so fond of Mort, aren’t they? of Clare, too, of course. You don’t play the piccolo?
No, sir. The piano. Only the black keys.
Rich … only the black. Haha. That limitation isn’t mentioned here … in your CV. Nooo. So we know it’s been thinned, not padded. Haha. Haha. You find me in a good mood.
I thought Mr. Skizzen mentioned the organ in his dossier, Professor Carfagno ventured. In addition to the piano.
Oh. I did. Yes. The organ.
We have a wonderful organ here at Whittlebauer when it works, the very thing angels would play if it was light enough for them to carry around. Though I guess they find all things easy.
We need an organist, and somebody who can do choir. Professor Carfagno spoke to Joseph’s knees, pressed together like a girl’s should be.
But we mustn’t rush things, mustn’t let need hasten us into error. Yes. I mean no, we mustn’t. This meeting, for example, is wholly preliminary. We shall cast our net wide. Our trawlers shall plow the seas. However, since we could see from your CV that you — surprise! eh? — live here in Woodbine … well, we thought we might speak to you first.
I’m glad of that.
How long have you been living in Woodbine — it seems such an unlikely spot.
Oh, now, Clare, don’t say that. What is unlikely about our little piece of Eden?
For someone born in Austria.
We all come from somewhere else, here, in America.
I understand you studied music in Graz.
No, sir, Professor Rinse. My studies were in Vienna where my father played a second violin for the philharmonic.
Quite an accomplishment.
Thank you, yes, but a second violin. To be only a second. It broke his heart.
I should imagine. Rinse’s eyes had now risen to Joey’s belt.
The symphony has a school. I studied with the great Gerhardt Rolfe.
You don’t say. Rolfe?
A very demanding man. I was very young, of course.
How precocious!
I might have been called that if I had been four or five, but I was ten.
It seems to me I’ve heard your name. Bruited about, you know. Morton’s eye was eye to eye with Joey’s finally, under a wrinkled brow.
My mother lives in town, too. And I did do some substituting at Saint Agatha’s Church.
Ah, yes, that … must … be … it.
I must see to the welfare of my mother.
Is that on your CV? I don’t remember that being on your CV.
It was just a little substituting. I didn’t think it significant.
For what were you a substitute, may I inquire?
The organist.
Nice crowd at the Saint Agatha’s. You read our ad, I suppose, and know what we need. Here at Whittlebauer we are a different denomination, of course. So many children … in their world of belief … destined for the service of the church. Great advantage. They are aimed like an arrow …
No, I’m afraid not, sir. I didn’t see — didn’t read—
But they are as prolific as herrings!
Yes, sir. I meant that I learned of the position from my mother and she from friends before I called the office here on the Hill and got the information.
Oh, too bad. We had a fine ad … in all the major journals, too. We even considered the Times, the ad was so fine.
The Woodbine …?
No, no. New York. The New York Times. But they wanted entirely too much. Who do they think they are? We are not a wealthy school. Just rich in CVs. Haha. They take advantage of our Middle West, our size. We select, of course, as carefully as any good greengrocer. Our students. And our faculty, too, as you can see.
Professor Rinse, you might have heard my name — I just remembered where — you might have heard my name in connection with President Palfrey’s niece, Miss Gwynne Withers, who—
Gwynne Withers! she’s my niece. How is it you know her?
— whom you once substituted for — music and magic, was it? — when she was unable—
To get my piano tuned! yes! I remember that. You remember that, don’t you, Mort? the piano she was going to use — well, the piano belongs to the college, of course, but it is located in my—
For the Board of Trustees? yes, she was quite distraught, as I remember. So I stepped in, Mr. Skizzen, as it happened, yes, music and magic, stepped in with Music and Magic. I play the violin, sometimes, with my tie.
They couldn’t find a tuner in time. Was that you? who was to accompany—?
Yes, but I found a tuner. He just couldn’t find us. I was to accompany her in preparing for her recital. A man from Columbus was to have — you know — come for the occasion from Columbus, it was indeed Columbus—
There is a story there, Mr. Skizzen, with a moral. Or an immoral — haha. I am in good spirits. Whittlebauer is in good spirits.
A Mr. Kleger, it was, wasn’t it, sir?
You are right, Rinse. Miss Gwynne … It is the Welsh blood, you know. Can’t otherwise account for it. She’s married now.
How so?
To that Kleger fellow. Herbert Kleger, that’s it. Married his pupil. There was hanky-panky, sir, you can believe me, and it reached the Columbus papers. He accompanied her right up to the altar. And a child should be along any day now.
Well, that’s news.
Kleber — Kleber — never liked the fellow, though he was said to play well. So you were to — well, you should have accompanied her. Why didn’t we do that?
The piano wouldn’t have accompanied us.
Ah yes, of course. Did we ever get the damn thing to play?
Clarence?
?
Mort?
?
What, Mr. Skizzen, is your principal area of interest, Professor Rinse asked after enduring his own silence. You realize that we are a small department and must cover the musical globe.
Well, sir, I have many interests, modern music most of all, I suppose. While studying in Vienna I became fascinated with the work of Arnold Schoenberg, especially the pieces he composed during his transition from tonal to atonal music. I am about to publish a piece on Style and Idea.
Professor Carfagno cleared his throat. Everyone paused to listen. This throat is going to kill me, he said, between moments during which his face turned an unaccustomed color.
Clare, you should have that looked at. You can’t help the chorus with a throat like … Lozenges. At least lozenges.
Frederick Delius, Joseph was in a hurry to say. I like his music, too.
Oh yes, delicious.
Perfectly charming.
Though his C-minor piano concerto isn’t much, Joseph dared to add. I’ve heard some say so.
I didn’t want you to think I was stuck in the present.