And Cami believed that to the bottom of her soul. “Mark’s world began and ended with Mother and Jaymi. Losing a part of that world was more than he could bear.”
Rafe watched her for long, considering moments. “Pack up.” He surprised her with the command. “We’ll move to the ranch until this is resolved.”
“And what will that solve?” She breathed out with an edge of weariness. “Running won’t make him move any faster; it will only delay the inevitable. And I’m not running. Not yet.”
She hadn’t run from her problems since she was a child. “That was one of the few lessons Mark has taught me. Running shows weakness and fear. I’m not ready to give that impression quite yet.”
“You’re being too damned stubborn,” Rafe muttered as he came out of the chair and stalked over to her. “Should I have that put on your gravestone? ‘She Died Stubborn.’”
Her lips almost twitched. “Look at it this way,” she suggested. “I may die stubborn, but I intend to make certain that he knows he didn’t get the best of me in any other way. He’ll know he failed.”
“And that’s so important to you?” Rafe asked incredulously.
“Important?” she whispered. “Not so much important, Rafe, as all I have left. Through the years it’s all I’ve had, Rafe; Mark took everything else. And what he didn’t take Thomas Jones did when he killed Jaymi. Besides, what will leaving accomplish?”
“I know my home turf. I can protect it,” Rafe answered her instantly.
“And he doesn’t. Whoever attacked me won’t come after me there. He’ll just wait, and he’ll watch, and the Callahan cousins will have to blink eventually.”
“If I lost you, Cami, it would destroy me.”
She blinked back at him.
He said it so seriously, as though the words were torn from a place so deep inside himself that he wasn’t certain where they came from either.
Cami swallowed tightly. “What do you want me to say?” She was suddenly terrified. Terrified of herself and the emotions she suddenly felt being torn from deep inside her.
She’d kept parts of her locked down for as long as she could remember, definitely since she had lost their child. But even before that, there were hopes, dreams, needs, and desires that she’d refused to allow herself.
“You seem so surprised,” he murmured as he stopped in front of her. “Why do you think I arranged to meet you in Denver all those years ago? Why do you think I tried so hard to give you the time you needed to make that first move, to come to me, to be sure you wanted me, Cami? To be sure you’d tasted freedom and were ready to accept everything I felt for you? Everything I need to be with you?”
She shook her head, staring up at him, at the blaze of emotion in his eyes, at the truth of everything he was saying.
“We can talk about this later,” she forced the words past her lips.
“Because you’re terrified to hear the words? Tell me, kitten.” His hands cupped her cheeks, forced her to keep her gaze locked with his. “Has anyone ever told you they loved you?”
Had they?
She’d known Jaymi had loved her, but had she ever said the words?
She hadn’t, Cami realized.
“Mother,” she whispered.
When she had been younger. Before Mark had decided she was such a threat.
“I love you, Cami.”
She flinched.
Something seemed to shatter in her chest. A wash of fear, followed by a blaze of heat and an outpouring of emotion that dragged a sob from her chest and left her trembling in front of him.
“Don’t lie to me,” she burst out, her voice as shaky as her knees now. “Please, Rafe. Please don’t lie to me. I couldn’t survive it.”
“Have I ever lied to you?”
He never had, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t. It didn’t mean he couldn’t change his mind later.
“No, you haven’t lied to me,” she whispered as she felt that first tear ease from her eyes. “I couldn’t bear it if you lied to me now, Rafe.”
His head lowered, his eyes locked with hers.
“I love you, Cambria Flannigan,” he whispered. “To the very depths of my soul. You’ve bound my heart since you were seventeen years old and didn’t have a date for the prom, and I’ve only grown to love you more each year.”
Her breathing hitched. Another sob shook her.
“Cami?” he questioned her gently as his lips touched hers. “We both know you feel it. Aren’t you going to tell me you love me too?”
Her lips trembled.
“I love you,” she suddenly cried, feeling the tears as they began to run down her face, the love as it finally broke free inside her, pouring into the light, refusing to allow her to ignore it any longer. “Oh God, Rafe, I love you so much.”
His arms wrapped around her as he jerked her closer. His lips covered hers, his body surrounded her, and the warmth and strength that was so much a part of him encompassed her. She felt warm, heated.
For the first time in her life, Cami felt warm from the inside out.
CHAPTER 25
The day seemed to fly by.
For the first time in her life, Cami felt as though she were walking on air. There was no fear that dawn would come and force her to leave the man she loved. There was no fear that if she stared into his eyes too long, then she would see the same lack of emotion that she had seen in the eyes of the man who had called himself her father.
For the first time, Cami felt loved.
She felt wanted.
And for the first time the love she had carried so carefully inside her heart, kept wrapped and hidden away from harm, could emerge, be free, and she did not have to worry that the emotions that drew it free would turn on her and destroy her.
She’d lived her life in the shadow of Mark’s hatred, her mother’s inability to deal with reality, and her sister’s death. Still, Cami had held that dream inside her, that hope, and an endless well of love for one man. That love had always remained steadfast, living, breathing, and waiting for the day it could emerge.
But there was also the knowledge that there was no true security, not yet.
There was still that unseen threat that made no sense and the shadow that haunted her, no matter how she trusted in Rafe’s ability to protect her. As she had said, even the Callahan cousins had to blink eventually. Returning from the grocery store that evening, she couldn’t help but fear the day the other shoe would drop.
When that unseen threat would make its move and destroy the life she had dreamed of having.
If that threat hadn’t reared its head, then neither had Amelia. That was another worry that followed Cami through the day, as she wondered why her friend hadn’t slipped into the house yet and why she hadn’t found a way to contact Cami and let her know what was going on.
It had to be important or Amelia wouldn’t have taken the risk she took the day before.
“I’m going to go shower,” Cami told Rafe as he put away the bacon, eggs, and other items his cousins seemed to thrive on.
It was growing dark, and Cami knew if she didn’t try to keep her nerves at bay, and her fears from taking over, then she would end up going after Amelia herself.
Making her way up the stairs, Cami wished she’d been smarter, perhaps not so willing to ignore the fact that Sorenson was such an asshole.
She simply hadn’t expected him to search through her things, though. Even more, she hadn’t expected him to read that particular journal. It was almost as though he had known exactly where to look for it.
Sighing at the futility of her thoughts, she pushed her bedroom door open, stepped in, then as the door cracked closed whirled around in shock and fear.