Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring. Five times. Ten times. Then, on the fourteenth ring: "Hello?"
"Hello, this is Laura Clayborne. Is Doug there yet, please?"
"Who?"
"Doug Clayborne. Is he there yet?"
"Nobody's here, ma'am. Just us."
"Who are you?"
"I'm Wilbur," the man said. "Just us janitors here."
"Mr. Parker must be there."
"Who?"
"Eric Parker." Irritation flared. "Don't you know who works in that office?"
"There's nobody here but us, ma'am. We're just cleanin' up, that's all."
This was crazy! she thought. Even if Doug hadn't had time to get to the office yet, Eric Parker must be there! He'd called from the office, hadn't he? "When Doug Clayborne comes in," she said, "would you have him call his wife?"
"Yes ma'am, sure will," the janitor answered, and Laura said thank you and hung up.
She took Burn This Book into the den, put on a tape of Mozart chamber music, and sat down in a comfortable chair. Ten minutes later she was still staring at the same page, pretending to read but thinking Canterbury Six two tickets Doug should be at the office by now, why hasn't he called, where is he?
Another five minutes crept past. Then ten more, an eternity. Doug's hurt! she thought. He might've had an accident in the rain! As she stood up, she felt David twitch in her belly, as if sharing her anxiety. In the kitchen, she phoned the office again.
It rang and rang and rang, and this time there was no answer.
Laura walked into the den and back into the kitchen in an aimless circle. She tried the office once more, and let the thing ring off the hook. No one picked up. She looked at the clock. Maybe Doug and Eric had gone out for a drink. But why would they do that if there was so much work to be done? Well, whatever was going on, Doug would tell her about it when he got home.
Just like he'd told her about the tickets?
Laura spun the Rolodex, and found Eric Parker's home number.
She was going to feel very dumb about this tomorrow, when Doug told her he and Eric had gone out to meet a client, or that they'd simply decided not to answer the phones while they were working. She was going to feel like crawling into a hole, for thinking – even minutely – that Doug might not be telling her the truth.
She was afraid to make the call. The gnawing little fear rose up and gripped her by the throat. She picked up the telephone, punched the first four numbers, and then put it down again. She phoned the office a third time; no answer, after at least twenty rings.
The moment of truth had arrived.
Laura took a deep breath and phoned Eric Parker's house.
On the third ring, a woman said, "Hello?"
"Hi. Marcy? It's Laura Clayborne."
"Oh, hi, Laura. I understand the time's growing near."
"Yes, it is. About two weeks, more or less. We've got the nursery all ready, so now all we're doing is waiting."
"Listen, enjoy the wait. After the baby comes, your life won't ever be the same."
"That's what I've heard." Laura hesitated; she had to go on, but it was tough. "Marcy, I'm trying to get in touch with Doug. Do you know if they went out to meet a client, or are they just not answering the phones?"
There was a few seconds of silence. Then: "I'm sorry, Laura. I don't know what you mean."
"Eric called Doug from the office. You know. To finish up some work."
"Oh." Marcy was silent again, and Laura felt her heart beating hard. "Laura… uh… Eric went to Charleston this morning. He won't be back until Saturday."
Laura felt the blood burn in her cheeks. "No, Eric called Doug from the office. About an hour ago."
"Eric's in Charleston." Marcy Parker gave a nervous laugh. "Maybe he called long distance?"
"Maybe." Laura was light-headed. The noise of the rain was a slow drumroll on the roof. "Listen… Marcy, I… shouldn't have called. I shouldn't have bothered you."
"No, it's all right." Marcy's voice was uneasy; she wanted to get off the phone. "I hope everything's fine with the baby. I mean, I know it will be, but… you know."
"Yes. Thank you. You take care."
"Good-bye, Laura."
Laura hung up.
She realized the music was over.
She sat in her chair in the den as rain streamed down the windows. Her hand gripped the two green ticket stubs, to a theater she'd never been to. Her other hand rested on her swollen belly, finding David's warmth. Her brain felt full of thorns, and it made thinking painful. Doug had answered the phone and talked to someone he called Eric. He'd gone to the office to work. Hadn't he? And if he hadn't, then where had he gone? Her palm was damp around the tickets. Who was Doug with if Eric was in Charleston?
Laura closed her eyes and listened to the rain. A siren wailed in the distance, the sound building and then waning. She was thirty-six years old, two weeks away from giving birth for the first time, and she realized she had been a child way too long. Sooner or later, the world would break you down to tears and regrets. Sooner or later, the world would win.
It was a mean place to bring a child into, but it was the only world there was. Laura's eyes were wet. Doug had lied to her. Stood right there and lied to her face. Damn him, he was doing something behind her back, and she was carrying their baby in her womb! Anger swelled, collapsed into sadness, built back again. Damn him! she thought. Damn him, I don't need him! I don't need any of this!
Laura stood up. She got her raincoat and her purse. She went out into the garage, grim-lipped, got into the BMW, and drove away, searching in the dark for a place where there were people, noise, and life.
4: Mr. Mojo Has Risen
She tasted him in her mouth, like bitter almonds.
The first time, she'd wanted it because she missed it. The second time, she'd done it because she was thinking of how she could get a better rate on the acid. Now she stood in the bathroom, brushing her teeth, her hair damp around her shoulders. Her gaze followed the network of scars on her stomach, down to the ridges of scar tissue that ran between her thighs. Freaky, Gordie had said. Looks like a fuckin' roadmap, don't it? She'd been waiting for his response, steeling herself for it as she'd taken off her clothes. If he had laughed or looked disgusted, she didn't know what she might have done. She needed him, for what he brought her, but sometimes her anger rose up as quick as a cobra and she knew she could reach into his eyeballs with two hooked fingers and break his neck with her other hand before he figured out what had hit him. She looked at her face in the mirror, her mouth foamy with Crest. Her eyes were dark; the future was in them.
"Hey, Ginger!" Gordie called from the bedroom. "We gonna try the acid now?"
Mary spat foam into the sink. "I thought you said you had to meet your girlfriend."
"Aw, she can wait. Won't hurt her. I was pretty good, huh?"
"Far out," Mary said, and she rinsed her mouth and spat into the sink again. She returned to the bedroom, where Gordie was lying on the bed in the tangled sheet smoking a cigarette.
"How come you talk like that?" Gordie asked.
"Talk like what?"
"You know. 'Far out.' Stuff like that. Hippie talk."
"I guess because I used to be a hippie." Mary crossed the room to the dresser, and Gordie's shiny eyes followed her through the haze of blue smoke. On top of the dresser were the Smiley Face circles of acid. She cut two of them away with a small pair of scissors, and she could feel Gordie watching her.
"No shit? You used to be a hippie? Like with love beads and all that?"
"Love beads and all that," she answered. "A long time ago."
"Ancient history. No offense meant." He puffed smoke rings into the air, and he watched the big woman walk to the stereo. The way she moved reminded him of something. It came to him: a lioness, silent and deadly in one of those documentaries about Africa on TV. "You into sports when you were younger?" he asked innocently.