A quiet moment passed and I was certain Joshua didn't know what to say. “It's okay to miss her.”
“I know.” I wiped the corner of my eye before it had time to slip down my cheek. “I just wish she could have come with us.” I sighed, giving a soft laugh. “Maybe that's a terrible idea. She would have slowed us down or, worse, died in Haven. I should be relieved I know she's still alive.” As soon as I said it, I grimaced. “I'm sorry.”
“Don't be.” Joshua squeezed my hand. I knew he had to wonder if his mother had made it out alive before the attack on Haven. He'd never voiced his concerns but the fear had to be there. Watching his sister, Jacqueline, vanish in the smoke must not have been a happy memory for him either. Though he'd hardly known her, she was still his flesh and blood, his sister.
“I love you,” I breathed, rolling around to face him as I stayed curled in his embrace. His eyes were closed and I could feel the agony and pain radiating off him. Though he said nothing, I knew he hurt inside. I wanted desperately to take that pain away, make him feel better, but I didn't know how. Slowly I leaned in, dropping soft kisses to his cheek and his eyes. “It's okay,” I breathed, feeling his tears, pulling him tighter to me as my hands traveled along his back, holding him against me.
I knew nothing I could say or do would erase the pain he felt and the concern that had edged itself into him when we'd left Haven. All I could do was be there for him as we held on to hope that perhaps his mother was still alive.
CHAPTER 13
Early the next morning, I joined Elsa and Chloe in the science center. It wasn't my favorite place to go, considering they'd administered the Mindonsiphan to us there as recruits. But I wasn't afraid. After all that we'd been through, somehow, I felt stronger.
Joshua spent the morning with Mason, training out in the hanger. I had no idea what they were up to but figured if I needed to know, they'd invite me out there.
Sitting across from the girls, Chloe unboxed several instruments she'd brought with her. “What are those?” I asked curiously.
Chloe smiled, glancing at me. “They're hormone testing kits. We want to verify that you are something special.”
Her words made me uneasy. Did I want to know? Was it better not knowing? Although everyone assumed I was different, if I wasn't this would put an end to it. “How will this help?” I didn't understand the relevance.
“It may not.” Chloe was honest, brutally so. “It might not make any difference at all, but our doctors and scientists have been studying the human body and reproduction for generations. I have to believe you're different.”
“And if I'm not?” I muttered beneath my breath.
“Then I guess we're no worse off than before I got here.” Chloe smiled weakly. “I was like you once, young, curious; I lived in Genesis.”
That took me by surprise. “You did?”
Chloe's face was hard, the smile faded. “About fifteen years ago I was an assistant on a genetics team in Genesis. I suspect there was genetic engineering going on along with implantation. I didn't stay around long enough to be fully entrusted with information.”
“Why did you leave?” I couldn't fathom a reason she would want to leave and go through the hell Joshua and I had endured.
Chloe sighed, “I was from a different Genesis town, Genesis Beta. The rules were much the same where you grew up,” Chloe explained. “I had just turned twenty-one and already had a daughter. When my name was called at ‘The Day of the Chosen’ for the lottery, I was devastated that I would have to conceive a second child who would be given to the government. That night, before going to the medical center to begin the process, I fled with my daughter.”
“What about your husband?” I asked.
“He died protecting us,” she answered solemnly.
“I'm sorry,” I whispered, knowing it wasn't my fault but still feeling terrible for Chloe.
“Don't be.” She shook her head. “It was awful,” she admitted. “But my daughter, Zarrah, knows freedom. Something I could never have given her without his help.” She turned her attention to the kit, pulling the tubes out. “I'm going to need a blood sample from you, if that's okay.”
“Yeah, sure.” I nodded, watching as Elsa grabbed a vial and needle along with a rubber band to draw blood. I turned away. Elsa was good though: I barely felt the needle as she pricked me. I couldn't say the same about Sydney when she'd taken my blood. A moment later she filled the vial and gave me a small cloth to hold against my broken skin.
“Do you need my help with anything?” I offered, wanting to be of assistance. I still didn't fully understand what they were doing with my blood but if it could help save lives, I was willing to try anything.
Chloe glanced at me. “We'll run the tests. It may be a few hours before we have any results. You're free to go.”
“I'll be outside if you need me.” I gestured, heading out of the building and into the cool winter air. The weather here was much more bearable considering I'd lived in Genesis most of my life. The winters in Genesis were brutal and matched in intensity by its scorching summers. My mother used to tell me the intense weather was a result of our destruction on the planet hundreds of years ago, and that we were paying the price for it. Shadow hardly seemed affected in the same way and I wondered how that could be possible.
Stepping out into the cool winter air, I wrapped my arms around myself as I glanced around. I saw Chancellor Collins coming my way and he gave me a brief wave and called out to me, “Olivia.” With a heavy sigh I walked over, approaching him. I had no idea what he wanted. “How are you doing?” he asked as I stood before him. He stood tall, looming over me as I kept my arms around my body.
“Okay, I guess.”
“I wanted to talk to you about Torv and the guests we brought into town.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You told me once, we don't have guests here.”
“Usually, we don't,” he acknowledged with a weak nod. “But obviously times change. We brought in Adelaide, Madeline, Taron, and Preston from Thena. Come with me.” He gestured, escorting me into the building I was all too familiar with. It was where we held our weekly meetings and where our test of honesty had taken place. To this day I still felt a chill as I stepped into the foyer.
I followed him inside and into his office. I glanced around at the furniture, nearly untouched. The couch I'd sat on hadn't moved an inch. I'm not sure why I thought it would have. I walked over towards the sunlight, staring out the dirty window. “Why am I here?” I asked.
Chancellor Collins sighed. “I wanted your opinion on our newest recruits.”
“Is that what you're calling them?” I scoffed. “They are staying where Joshua and I stayed.” I nodded slowly. “Do you plan on doing the same procedure—Mindonsiphan—and requiring them to undergo the same training that we had?” I was appalled at the notion that they brought back a handful of allies only to kidnap and torment them.
“Hardly.” Chancellor Collins shook his head. “I hoped you could provide some insight, seeing as how you've met Chloe?”
I shrugged. “She seems all right.” I didn't know what he expected. I wasn't capable of reading someone's mind. I could only share thoughts; it was completely different. “Chloe seems plenty knowledgeable.”
The Chancellor took a seat as I remained by the window. “They are an interesting community, Torv. Just hours on foot from the government, yet untouched.”
“You don't trust them?” I asked. “If that's the case then why did you let them come here?” It made no sense to me.
The Chancellor sat in his chair, his hands folded together as he considered his words. “I trust they believe they're doing what is in the best interest of the rebel alliance back east.”