“Philip with them.”
Of all the horror stories he could have told her, she never would have expected this. It seemed unreal, impossible, and yet it made total sense in a terrifying, life-changing way.
There had always been moments when she had to make choices, deciding for the good of the pack. Many times serious decisions as well, life and death on the line for more than one person.
Maybe it wasn’t the choice she would have made. But there was no way to know for sure, not unless she’d been in his position, dealing with the fear and anger Evan would have faced.
Was her brother an acceptable sacrifice? She didn’t know.
Would her brother have considered his sacrifice acceptable?
That was an entirely different question, and somehow she hoped he would have. If it had been her, knowing a terror like Kirk Gatlann was running the pack, she would’ve done everything she could to take him out.
Evan hadn’t said a word since he finished. He barely seemed to be breathing, holding motionless in anticipation of her response.
The only thing she could do was offer him comfort. She pressed closer, easing her forehead against his and holding him to her body. “I was wrong to make you a target.”
His body shook. “Do you forgive me for killing Philip?”
She swallowed hard and hung on tighter. “There’s nothing to forgive.”
Something brand-new appeared in his eyes. Muted joy? Or maybe it was hope, plain and simple. “Tell me somehow in the next fifty years you can learn to trust me. I need you, Amy. I need you as my mate, and while I’m so sorry I broke your heart and caused you pain, I can’t stand the thought of not being with you anymore.”
“We need to trust each other. Not in the future, but now. That’s the only way we can actually be together.”
His eyes darkened, his breathing grew rapid. “We’ve known each other such a short time, so filled with chaos, yet you’re already a part of me. You don’t believe that yet, but I’ll show you. Whether it takes a day, a week, or longer, you’ll know how much you are cared for. How much you belong to me, and I belong to you.”
It was the time for sharing secrets, so she had to be brave. “I haven’t belonged to anyone in forever. Any time I tried, people disappeared. My brother, my family. One foster home after another was ripped from me for reasons I never understood. My world was continually torn apart, and I always thought if Philip hadn’t died, everything would have been different. I would have had a family who loved me and were always there for me.”
He pressed his lips to her temple.
Amy pushed the past aside. “I won’t blame you anymore. I needed to share that because it’s part of what built me. What made me afraid.”
He stroked her, both with his hands and the other part of himself that was so reassuring, so comforting. “I would’ve hated me too.”
“I don’t want to hate anyone anymore.”
Evan cupped her chin in his hand. “You aren’t alone. God, I’ve been such a fool, and made such mistakes. But we’re going to fix this. This is not just about our pasts. It’s about the fact I want to be with you, and I want to be everything I have to be so you’re never alone.”
Inside, her wolf uncurled. Over the past weeks, the beast had retreated, upset and saddened by what she thought was the rejection of her mate. “How do we move on?”
“The same way you start anything. At the beginning.” He brushed his lips over hers. Infinitely tender before pulling back to stare into her eyes. “Yes, we have two packs that need us to unite them, but this isn’t about them. This is about us. The stronger we are, the better we will be able to support them. It’ll become a circle. The stronger they are, the more you and I will be happy. Because that’s who we are, and what’s important to us. But we need to come first.”
Another crack split the ice around her heart.
“I can’t leave them. I thought about it,” Amy confessed. “I thought maybe if I did leave, Canyon would be forced to accept you as Alpha, but I can’t do it.”
Evan shook his head. “And you shouldn’t. The truth is Whitehorse will be the strongest with both of us. The packs aren’t independent of each other, no matter what they think. They need each other, and we need each other.”
Something inside melted more, and Amy risked a smile. “Then it’s a good thing we have each other.” Fear was fading. It had no place when faced by such truth. She found her fingers tangled with his. “We serve the wolves.”
“We,” he emphasized. “We’ve only begun finding ourselves.”
There was no way she could deny him.
Her head and heart were so full that when he leaned closer, she wasn’t sure at first what he planned. By the time his lips touched hers, she’d lost the ability to protest.
Besides, they were past the point of protesting. This was what they needed, not as a frustrated way to deal with two wolves and two people who weren’t sure what they wanted. This was a time for them to affirm they were mates, and that no matter what, they would face the future as one.
He held her tenderly even as the kiss grew more intense. Amy lifted up so she could straddle his body. She grasped his shoulders and held on tight as their mouths met. He sank his teeth into her lower lip, and a shudder rolled through her. Acceptance and trust building.
She got his buttons open, desperate to make contact with skin. Then one long, slow stroke followed another as she explored his pectorals, and up over his shoulder muscles. Dragging her nails down his biceps before repeating the move all over again.
He was busy as well, peeling away her top so he could tease and pet. Hands so gentle on her body even as she understood there was no escaping his touch.
He cupped his palms around her breasts, circling his thumbs over her nipples until they peaked. When he leaned over and licked the tight points, satisfaction rippled over her skin.
This was what she needed. Not just a mate she was attracted to because of fate and circumstance. This was a man who was totally connected with her and ready to take on the world at her side.
Evan brought her with him as he took them down the hallway to her bedroom. She smiled against his lips as he lowered her to the bed. “I disconnected the remote control. Sorry.”
“I’m still seeing stars, and if this bed isn’t rocking on its own soon, I’m doing something wrong.”
It took ten seconds to get rid of the rest of her clothes while he was busy doing the same. There wasn’t a frantic need for massive foreplay. Instead, it was all about connection. Being there for each other.
They lay naked on the bed, body and soul exposed. Touching gently, exploring and talking quietly at the same time.
“I wanted to wake up with you in my arms,” Evan confessed. “That first morning, after we spent the night together. I missed you. Deep down inside my soul, I knew something was still wrong and I ached for you.”
Amy understood. “That night you had the nightmare. I wanted so badly to comfort you, but I was so afraid. What if I opened myself up to hope, and you were torn away like everyone else in my world?”
He kissed her. Pressed his lips to hers, to her cheek, up and over her eyes. Brushing away tears that came involuntarily. Kissing her temples, and her nose, and her chin. As if he couldn’t get enough of touching her.
“I’m yours. I’ll never leave you, and we’ll find a way to be together and serve the pack.” He tucked her against his body so they were connected. Not like while making love, but every inch plastered together until neither of them could move without the other being totally aware of it. “If it ever comes to a choice, we’ll work together to find a way. I promise.”