But none of it was going to bring my father back.
Another vehicle pulled down the drive to the barn. It sounded like Jason’s truck. Jason. Suddenly I knew I needed to talk to him. I sensed it. My brow furrowed. Strange. Did he feel like he’d let the Pack down by not being able to save Malcolm? On some level I never knew existed, I knew he needed me.
I kissed Lana’s cheek, drinking in her scent like a balm for all the wounds in my heart. She stretched and her lashes fluttered. The sight of her smile as she opened her eyes made my heart pound.
“Is it time to get up?” She stretched her arms over her head.
I nodded. “Yeah, the Pack is here. We better get down there.”
Her smile vanished, and she took my hand. “I’m sorry, Adam.”
I brought her hand to my lips and kissed the back of her fingers. “We’ll get through this.”
Then another sixth-sense-type realization hit me. Aren. Something was…off with him. I focused on Lana again. “This is going to sound crazy, but I need to tell you something.”
Lana chuckled. The sound of her laughter was a gift. I’d never be able to tell my father goodbye without her shoulder to lean on.
“I turn into a jaguar once a month, and I’ve seen what an amazing wolf you are when the moon is full. What could be crazier than that?”
“My dad used to have a sense about the members of the Pack. It was creepy sometimes how he’d know something was wrong and then just show up. He did it to me a couple of times after I first met you. Every once in a while he could almost finish your thoughts for you even though you didn’t say anything out loud.”
“Maybe he was a little bit psychic?”
“He said something to me last night about how I would know how to be the Alpha. I thought he was crazy, but now…”
Her brow creased. “Are you all right?”
I nodded. “I’m fine, it’s just that now… I sense them. Like when Jason drove in, I knew I needed to talk to him tonight. I could feel his guilt over my father dying.”
“But it wasn’t his fault.”
“I know that, but he’s our doctor. He’s worried Aren and I are angry with him, and that he let the Pack down by not saving Malcolm.”
She raised a brow. “That is kinda crazy.” Then she kissed me and smiled. “Crazy cool.”
My grin went crooked. “Too bad it doesn’t seem to work with you.”
Lana got out of bed, and my eyes slid over every curve.
“Good thing. I’m pretty sure it’d piss me off if you thought you knew what I was thinking all the time.”
“You’d change your mind just to prove me wrong,” I teased as I pulled on my pants.
Lana popped her head through one of my T-shirts and shot me an innocent look. “Who? Me?”
I kissed her tenderly and smiled. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For helping me get through tonight.”
Color flushed over Lana’s cheeks. “You don’t need to thank me. I thought we agreed we’re a team now, right?”
“I want to be your husband.” I hadn’t realized I was going to say the words, but once they were out of my mouth, I knew they were true. Lana didn’t say anything, and my heart started to pound.
“Are you asking me to marry you?”
I swallowed the lump in my throat as I looked at the tiny ball of fire wearing my shirt and a pair of wrinkled blue jeans. “This wasn’t how I pictured I would propose.”
Lana grinned and rushed into my arms, laughing. “Then it’s just perfect.”
I kissed her long and slow, savoring the way her soft lips parted and her tongue tangled with mine. I’d never get tired of tasting her. Never. I drew back with a smile.
“So is that a yes?”
Her eyes sparkled up at me. “Yes.”
I kissed her again, holding her so tight that her feet left the ground. With a single word, Lana had added light to a dark day in my life. I could face anything with her in my corner.
…
When we got down to the barn everyone had arrived except Gareth. The last remaining members of our elders, Nicholas and Wyatt, with their mates Laura and Sarah, stood together, stoic beside Malcolm’s body, saying their goodbyes. As Lana and I approached they both straightened and offered their condolences.
“Thank you.” I clasped their forearms. “It looks like we’re only missing Gareth.”
“He may not make it. He’s still mourning his brother.” Nicholas made eye contact with Wyatt. “Since Gabe was killed by a jaguar, Gareth is struggling seeing our Alpha with…”
His words died away, but I could feel my hackles rising. “She had nothing to do with Gabe’s death. She helped me try to save him.”
“So you say,” Gareth replied from behind me.
I didn’t turn around to face him. I wanted to blow my stack and attack him, but staring at my father’s body reminded me that I couldn’t be the hotheaded son of the Alpha anymore. I was the Alpha. I was now the voice of reason for my Pack. Somewhere the fates were laughing their asses off.
Gareth finally came around to greet the elders, and then faced me. “I’m sorry about Malcolm,” he said clasping my forearm.
“Thank you. I miss Gabe, too, you know”
He glanced at Lana. “Not enough.”
When he tried to step back, I didn’t release his forearm. Instead, I pulled him up close to me. His eyes widened, but he didn’t fight.
“Whatever you think of my mate needs to stay inside of your lips. Do you understand me?”
Gareth was the polar opposite of his twin, Gabe. Where Gabe had a warm smile for everyone, Gareth usually had a dismissive look. He’d never attacked anyone in the Pack, but he was our lone wolf. It was tough to read what was going on in his mind, so I wanted to be sure he understood I wouldn’t tolerate any threats against Lana. If he couldn’t get past that she was a jaguar and the mate of his Alpha, then he could leave the Pack forever. His choice.
“Do you understand me, Gareth?” I asked him one more time.
His eyes looked as black as his hair. He gripped my arm tighter. “Yes.”
He tore his arm out of my grip and turned on his heel to walk out the back toward the pyre we built for Malcolm.
Wyatt stepped in closer. “He’s hurting. His brother was all he had left. He misses him. We all do.”
“I know.” I nodded.
They followed Gareth out, and I walked over to Aren. “Have you seen Jason anywhere?”
Aren scanned the barn and then shook his head. “He pulled in about twenty minutes ago with Jared, but I haven’t seen him since.”
To my surprise, my brother leaned down to embrace Lana. I couldn’t help but smile. If she could win over Aren, the rest of the Pack would surely follow. I just needed to be patient. Not one of my strong suits.
“I need to find him. I’ll be right back.”
Aren nodded. “I’ll keep Lana company until you get back.”
“Thanks.” I kissed her forehead. “Be back soon.”
…
Jason was standing at the pasture fence, feeding carrots to one of the old broodmares. She nickered and nudged his arm for more treats. He pulled out another piece of a carrot from his jacket pocket and stroked his hand down her mane.
“You can’t find a better listener on earth than a horse,” I said as I approached. Jason looked over at me and nodded. His light brown hair was tied back at his collar, and he wore black from head to toe. But he still didn’t say anything. “You’re gonna spoil Sandy if you feed her any more carrots,” I added.
He rubbed the blaze that ran down her forehead. “Sorry, Sandy. Adam said you’ve had enough. Blame him for the carrot shortage.”
He turned to face me, and we clasped forearms. “I’m sorry about Malcolm.”
“I wanted to talk to you about that before the ceremony.”