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“Longer … or are you all only counting the times it was successful?”

She snorted on the far end of the line. “Just do it, Edie. I’m not there, Dren can’t watch you during the day, and Sike won’t survive a fight with a were this close to the full moon. It’s supposed to be too humiliating for a vampire to have to ask for were-help for anyone to do it. One way in which my humanity helps me—I’m too emotionally wrapped up in your survival to care about my pride.”

“I can’t decide if that’s comforting or not.”

“I can’t tell you if it should be.” Behind her, I heard the sucking sound of an emptying drain.

“Where the hell are you?” I asked her.

“In a charnel house. I’ve spent the last three nights hung suspended in blood. The first test is always hunger.” She inhaled and exhaled deeply. “I have to sleep now, Edie. The dawn comes, and tomorrow promises to be just as long as today.”

And what did someone say to a teenage vampire whose fate was intertwined with her own? I shrugged at Asher’s hallway wall. “Good luck, Anna.”

“I hope not to need it.”

The line went dead.

* * *

I pushed myself to standing again, stretched out my back’s kinks, and descended to the first floor. When I didn’t find Asher, I decided to give myself a tour.

It was weird to be at his home without him in it. First, because I expected him to spring out and catch me snooping, and second, because without him, it seemed as sterile as the bathroom had the night before. With the exception of the library below, his bedroom was plain: a huge closet full of clothing—mostly nice, but there were some strange costumey pieces, a few additional tragic holiday-themed sweaters—but no photos on the walls. His bathroom was dull too, all white tile, wood, and chrome. I even looked in his medicine cabinet, but it only had extra tubes of toothpaste, not unlabeled bottles of Ativan. As I went from room to room, it looked like an open-house home, ready for show. You could put yourself into this house pretty easily. Just like last night I’d tried to put myself into Asher, via mouth-to-mouth.

There was one locked door, but I was a little ashamed about looking through all his other things, so it didn’t bother me, much.

I grabbed what I hoped was an extra shirt of his and rousted Gina, helping her to strip and turn on the shower. She needed it. I found a tray of bagels in his kitchen, a half-full tub of cream cheese, and a note saying Help yourself in clean block handwriting. A fresh pot of coffee, still warm, was the only thing to prove Asher’d been there.

I was on my second bagel when Gina made it down the stairs. “God, I’m so embarrassed.” On her, one of Asher’s shirts hung almost to her knees.

“Don’t be. Everyone’s been there.”

“I know. It’s just that I’m not supposed to be that person. I didn’t go to vet school for this.”

I proffered the bagels, and she shook her head, looking a little green. “I’m just glad you called me.”

“I didn’t mean to interrupt your date,” she said, and I stared blankly at her. “That guy who was here. This is his house, right?”

I snorted. “The only person I slept with last night was you. I have the tile prints on my ass to prove it.”

She made her way around the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. “If you’re not dating him, can I have his phone number?”

“He’s not really rebound material.” Though I would bet that Asher wouldn’t be above helping someone out with revenge sex. “He’s a shapeshifter.”

Gina made a face. “Oh.”

“Yeah.” The clock on the microwave said it was ten A.M. I needed to get back home. Gideon was less independent than a houseplant, and the only reason I remembered to feed Minnie was because she’d tell me to. “Gina—”

“It’s just that they’re going to ask. That’s what sucks.” She set her glass into the sink. “I introduced him to my parents, Edie. I thought he was the one.”

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t think I’d ever felt like that. I’d stood on the edge of The Oneness before, and maybe peeked into the valley below, but I’d never made the final jump. I’d learned that if you thought of people as disposable, it hurt less when they disposed of you.

But that didn’t stop me from putting an awkward arm around Gina as she slumped over Asher’s kitchen sink and cried.

* * *

We gathered ourselves into my car not long after she stopped crying. As I drove she narrated a tangled web of semi-plausibility. She’d told her parents she was working last night, and now she’d pretend she had car problems and had to wait for the mechanics and a tow.

“Why’s it so complicated?”

“I’m the baby of the family. I live with my parents. I just tell them I’m working when I go out on spend-the-night dates.”

“I’m the baby of my family too. When I turned eighteen, my mother flung open the doors and kicked me out of the nest.”

Gina sighed. “It’s different for me. I was working and going to vet school when my mother got early-onset Alzheimer’s. One of my brothers died in the war. The other moved away. My sister has four kids—taking care of Mom and Dad just fell to me. One day I was living at home to save money, the next I was stuck there because my dad couldn’t convince my mom to take a shower otherwise.”

“God. That’s tough, Gina.”

“Tell me about it.” She shook her head. “That’s what I traded. The Shadows keep her from getting any worse, and they get me, on Y4.” I winced, but she was looking out the window. She went on. “I’ve never actually gotten to be a real vet. What I would give someday to just take care of a yippy dog. Even just a hamster. Turn here.” She pointed in front of me. “If I’d stayed bitten, I wouldn’t have been able to keep my job. Y4 fires you if you fraternize too much—the Consortium won’t allow it. It might make you too biased, I guess.”

“Nah—probably because then everyone would do it, and there’d be no one left to work on the full moon,” I teased.

She gave me a halfhearted smile. “Really, if I lost my job, where would my mom and dad be? Part of me is afraid the Shadows will keep her alive forever, just to keep me trapped.”

“That’s a reasonable fear.”

“I know. Anyhow. It is what it is now. I’ll get out someday, just not today. Or tomorrow. Or four days from now.”

I turned into a neighborhood where all the homes were packed together tightly, and she directed me into her driveway. “You going to be okay?”

“Yeah. I’ll catch the bus into work tonight. I’ll be fine.”

That wasn’t exactly what I’d meant, but I nodded. “Call me if you need anything else, Gina.”

“I will.” She gave me a tight smile. Her hand was on the door handle, but she didn’t move to open the door. I could see her steeling herself to face her parents, haunted by the memories of what could have been, fighting the depression that came with realizing you made the wrong choice, even if you’re not entirely sure which one it was.

“He doesn’t deserve you, Gina. You know that, right?”

“I know. Doesn’t make it hurt any less.” She reached over and hugged me before jumping out of my car. I watched her till her front door opened, then waved as I pulled out of her driveway.

I wished I could have helped her out more, but I had problems of my own to get home to.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

“Honey, I’m home!” I announced as I walked into my house. There was a groan from the vicinity of my bathroom, and an accusatory meow from Minnie.

I walked around the bar and into my kitchen. I put an extra bagel into my fridge, noticing an empty space on my small kitchen counter where my toaster oven had been. Huh. Over by the couch, the mister bottle was empty. Hopefully some of that had gotten into Gideon’s mouth. I paused and listened for more noise. Gideon would be dead if Veronica had woken up—and God help Sike if she didn’t take Gideon with her when they took Veronica. I walked down my hall and pressed my ear to the bathroom door. There was silence beyond.