The resemblance had startled Jasper. It had never seemed that strong in photos or on TV, but when he looked into his brother’s eyes…and just why did Rule look so damn young? He was six years older than Jasper, but he looked fifteen years younger. The best surgeon in the world didn’t give you back young skin. Could it be a lupi thing? Maybe in addition to being preternaturally strong and sexy, they didn’t age.
That was an unsettling thought. But what about this day wasn’t unsettling, grim, terrifying—
His phone buzzed. His heart jumped in his chest, loathing and longing coupling promiscuously with fear, shame, and more—a veritable orgy of feelings that had him snatching the phone up quickly, then hesitating. He didn’t recognize the number, but Adam’s kidnapper never called from the same number twice. “Yes?”
“You did well, Jasper.” It was a warm voice, friendly, with just the right touch of sympathy, the kind of voice that could coax a smile from a sullen child.
Fresh diarrhea was warm, too. And just about as welcome. This wasn’t the voice Jasper longed for. “I’ll speak with Adam now.”
“Will you?” The amusement was light, not without that tracery of sympathy.
“That’s our deal. You want me to remain confident that you’ll honor your end, don’t you? You want me to go on believing that Adam is alive and that I’ll get him back.”
“I do enjoy dealing with an intelligent man,” his nemesis said in an approving way. “And yet I suspect that hope would work as well as certainty. Maybe better. It might be helpful for me to find out.”
Fear broke out the razor blades and sawed at Jasper’s gut. “I’m not a very optimistic person. I need certainty to keep me motivated. I’ll speak with Adam now, or I’ll speak to Lily Yu.”
“The laborer is worthy of his hire, I suppose. The Bible is wrong about a great deal,” he added, “but there are nuggets of wisdom among the debris. You’ve done as you were told, and you will receive your agreed-upon pay…since Adam is in fact quite well, though not particularly happy at the moment. First, however, I have instructions about tonight.”
“Wait while I get a pen.” He did that, collecting his notebook at the same time, then listened, jotting the pertinent facts down in his personal shorthand. Jasper had long since established the habit of putting any notes about a job down in a form no one could use against him in court.
“I’m surprised by your concern,” the warm voice said when Jasper questioned one point. “Have you changed your mind about Rule Turner now that you two have met? You told me you didn’t know much about him, but what you did know, you didn’t like.”
“Oh,” he breathed, “but I dislike you so much more.”
“Do you not think it impolitic to say so?”
“Who can we be truly frank with, if not our enemies?”
A chuckle, rich with amusement. “Oh, Jasper, don’t fool yourself. You’re bought and paid for. You’ll do as you’re told, and that’s hardly the behavior of an enemy, is it?”
TWENTY
RULE headed down the outdoor stairs, so baffled by emotion he barely noticed the closed-in feeling piling on top of the rest. He was only too aware of how poorly he’d handled himself in there, but at least he’d realized that and let Lily take the lead.
She’d done that efficiently, asking plenty of questions. Not the ones he’d wanted answered, such as: How did your mother die? Or Did she look like you? Like me? Or Did you ever think about contacting me? No, she’d asked the ones that should have mattered…and would, once he pulled himself together.
Time to make a start on that. At the base of the stairs, Rule began, “If Friar—”
“Let’s talk about it when we get to the car,” Lily said.
He grimaced. If Friar was involved, he’d been about to say, it changed the possibilities considerably…including the chance that someone was pointing a directional microphone their way right now. That was unlikely but possible, and he should have thought of it. “Point taken.” Then, to Scott: “Keep Chris and Alan here to keep an eye on Jasper. The others will follow us to the hotel. Send Barnaby and Joe ahead to check the car.” As he started down the sidewalk he asked Lily, “Is Drummond around?”
“Not visibly.”
Which was supposed to mean he couldn’t listen in, but…“Would you mind putting on your necklace?”
For answer she reached in her purse and pulled it out, closing her hand around the stones. “It works when it’s in contact with my skin. Or it’s supposed to.”
She didn’t tell him it was understandable that he was shaken. She didn’t ask what he thought of Jasper Machek or how he felt. She held the ghost-repelling necklace in one hand and took his hand with the other one, then walked beside him in silence. Bless her for that, as for so much else. He didn’t know what he felt or what he thought, and he couldn’t afford to be shaken. Not if Friar had his finger in this pot.
They moved briskly down the street. Rule tried to empty his mind. It didn’t work. He was still a jumble when they crossed the first street and Lily broke the silence.
“I liked Jasper.”
“I did, too.” He hadn’t expected to. He hadn’t expected…any of this. He wasn’t going to be able to put it aside, was he? He wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the things that ought to matter until he’d dealt with what, inexplicably, did. He stopped and glanced back at Scott. “I need to walk a bit and clear my head. If the car’s clean, have them drive it around the block until I signal.” He made the quick gesture that told Scott to drop back several yards.
“You want me to take a hike?” Cullen asked.
“Or a ride. I’d rather you didn’t wander around where someone could grab you or attempt to. Either stay with Scott or get in the car with the others.”
Rule resumed walking. Scott and Cullen fell behind. If he kept his voice low, they wouldn’t hear more than the occasional word. And now that he had this much privacy, he didn’t know what to say.
Lily didn’t prompt him. For once, she didn’t ask questions. She just kept pace with him for another two blocks. But now, for whatever reason, he could at least turn his attention away from the noise in his head, listening to the city sounds…cars, voices from some of the houses they passed, a dog in the last block, a cat in this one. The soft sound of Lily’s footsteps beside him. Her hand was warm in his. He watched as a woman in workout clothes pushed a jogging stroller along on the other side of the street. Its occupant looked sound asleep. And he heard himself say, “It never occurred to me that she was dead.”
Lily stopped, so he did, too. She looked at him. “Oh, Rule.”
“It should have occurred to me. She’d be over eighty by now if she’d lived, so it was an obvious possibility. But as long as I didn’t think of her…” He shoved his free hand through his hair. “She wasn’t real. She wasn’t a person to me, yet as long as I didn’t think about her, she was still alive somewhere.” Frustrated, he added, “I don’t know why it matters.”
“Death cuts off possibilities. Even if they were possibilities you never meant to act on, it feels different when they’re gone.”
Possibilities he never meant to act on, never thought he wanted. And now he ached from their loss. “She wasn’t a mother to me, but she was a person. I’ll never know that person. I never thought I’d want to.”
“She was bipolar.”
“What?” He stared. “I mean—I know what that is, of course, but how do you know that?”
“Isen told me last night. She was in treatment for it several times, on his dime. I thought he should have told you years ago. He and I argued about that.”