“What are you thinking, my love?” she asked.
“I am watching the sunlight wave over your face and it reminded me of the day I proposed, successfully, that is.” He laughed lowly. “Many aspects of that day are rather dreamlike to me, but I vividly remember how the sun illuminated your beautiful face precisely at the instant you accepted me. It was as if God Himself blessed our proclamation.”
“William, you are such a romantic and a poet! You ceaselessly astound me.” She kissed the skin over his heart. “However, for the sake of clarity I am obligated to point out that your actual proposal occurred several minutes later,” she teased, playfully pinching a nipple.
“A technicality, Mrs. Darcy. I do believe, if my memory serves, that you kissed me preceding the sun’s caress, thus assenting to my declaration of love and wish to share my life with you.”
She laughed. “We should say that you proposed three times! Each one an improvement and the kisses increasing in intensity and delight.”
“Do not remind me, beloved. I nearly forfeited my right to the title of gentleman ere we were betrothed an hour!” They both smiled in happy remembrance. He grasped her shoulders tenderly and drew her closer, kissing passionately. “My Lizzy, my lover! It is fortunate I did not comprehend the ecstasy of our love prior to marriage, or I never would have maintained my restraint for those interminable two months. As it is, I was sorely tested. My ardor for you appears to be boundless.”
He spoke the truth as decidedly evidenced when she pressed her hips against him. With reciprocated moans of pleasure they gave in to their love again. The memories of the day they at long last proclaimed their love and blissfully shared first kisses augmented their passion.
Late September, 1816
“My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject forever.”
How do you tell a man whom you have rejected and so wounded about your emotions for him? Can they be conveyed in a kiss to the hand? In a mumbled, nonsensical reply? Perhaps to a degree. He stands before her, impossibly handsome, declaring a love and desire for a life commitment that she does not deserve, yet now accepts as what she yearns for with every heartbeat. It will take all of my life, daily and hourly saying I love you, to wholly express the depth of my sentiments, she thinks, and by some miracle he has offered her that chance again. She grabs onto it as a drowning man clutches the rope, vowing never to relinquish as he is her salvation from a lifetime of emptiness and despair.
Darcy stands stunned and anxious as she steps close, taking the offered hand and bestowing a gentle kiss and caress. No words are necessary, the gesture a declaration of caring and acceptance. He understands this although the dream-like atmosphere and months of longing despair prevent him from instantly grasping it. His hand is on fire! In fact, his whole body is aflame, jolted by waves of heat emanating from her soft lips and fingers. His soul is renewed, and he knows it is a miracle purely and completely. The beautiful face that has haunted his dreams is now lifted upward. He touches her cheek tentatively and the world ignites.
For a horrifying second he suspects she will flinch or slap him or vanish into the mist. Instead, she closes her lovely eyes and leans minutely into his hand. Nothing in all his eight-and-twenty years has prepared him for the sensation of her velvety warm skin cupped in his palm. It is the most erotic, exhilarating experience of his life! At that instant, the sun lights her glorious face, rendering her mien angelic. It is a benediction from God Himself! Only her flesh anchors him to the ground.
Relief overwhelms and, with eyes closed, they surrender to the sublime delight of a tender touch. This is love! A profound heat rushes from their connected skin to the roots of their loneliness, disintegrating forever the walls of misunderstanding.
Time halts. They are dazzled. Enchanted in the rays from Heaven.
“I love you,” she whispers.
He inhales sharply and jerks as if stuck by a pin, eyes flying open. “Say it again,” he pleads softly.
She smiles, “I love you… Fitzwilliam.”
He shuts his eyes briefly, sighing with a sibilant moan. Then he flashes the brilliant smile she has so rarely seen, eyes sparkling and the palest blue. “Elizabeth. Lovely, precious Elizabeth,” he breathes as delicate fingertips trace a line of fire across her jaw and chin, finally lingering on her lips.
She holds her breath. He must kiss me! Her mind screams, I will die if he does not and likely die when he does! She trembles as he gazes at her with heart exposed and raw emotion written on his visage.
Oh, Lord, how I long to kiss her! His well-honed discipline and reserve dangles by the thinnest thread. Years hence he will recall this struggle as one of the harshest of his life; his very soul wars with the agonizing need to crush her to his body as he kisses her thirstily against the desire to show her the honor and respectability that is her due. How he manages to control his urges will remain a mystery. With a visible shudder he withdraws a pace, clasping both her hands securely in his.
“Elizabeth,” he begins huskily, pausing to clear his throat, “Elizabeth, there is much to say, much for me to apologize for, although I do not deserve your forgiveness. I did not plan this… rendezvous, and it is not how I intended to proceed in winning your affection. I wanted to court you properly and allot you time to improve your opinion of me and maybe, if I was so blessed, to have you love me. I never entertained the notion, even after my aunt restored my hope, that you felt a fraction of what I do.”
She squeezes his fingers, smiling up into his eyes. “I do,” she murmurs with a nod.
He exhales a happy sigh and shakes his head slightly in amazement. “Elizabeth, clever phrases and spontaneous conversation are not my forte, as you can attest. Therefore, Fate has gifted me with this adventitious opportunity and, considering how atrociously I botched my well-rehearsed proposal, Fate has proven the wiser.” They both smile and laugh faintly. “Simplicity appears to be Fate’s recommendation. Therefore, on that note…”
He grips her hands tighter and, without leaving her eyes for a second, he bends onto one knee. She releases a wavering sob as tears well over. Beaming, he asks, “Miss Elizabeth Bennet, I love you fervently and with all that I am. Will you honor me by becoming my wife?”
“Yes! Oh, yes, you know I will!”
Then she is in his arms and it is indescribable. There is no doubt the embrace is vastly more intimate and considerably longer than propriety would dictate. They do not care. Oddly, although perhaps not, there is only a hint of sensual passion; that will come later. Currently they merely delight in the closeness of the other, the engrossing sensation of belonging and unity.
Her face presses against his hard chest as she encircles his waist. A faint voice in her head wonders how she can be so brazen and improper. How can this form of intimacy feel absolutely correct so immediately? His radiating heat, heart pounding powerfully, and sturdy arms that encompass her body and keep her upright, all combine to create a haven of love and protection that surpasses imagination.
He encircles her lissome frame with stunned amazement. She is so small! Nearly from the instant his eyes touched hers at the Meryton Assembly, Elizabeth Bennet has loomed larger than life, to his reckoning. Her vibrancy, sharp intellect, and bold presence offset her svelte physique. As if designed specifically, her head rests perfectly on his breastbone and tucks exquisitely under his chin, while his arms easily surround her, broad hands flattening on her back. With a shock, he recognizes her fragility, coupled with an overwhelming strength. He could snap her bones facilely, yet she grips him with an unbelievably strong clench.