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Times could very easily (and very truthfully) run the headline A STAR IS DEAD.

“Look,” Abby said, shoving the

Journal American under my nose. “Kilgallen gave Gray a rave. She says he’s handsomer than Marlon Brando and James Dean put together. A lot more talented, too. She says if Gray doesn’t become an even bigger star than Brando or Dean, she’ll eat the chic new sunbonnet she bought for her upcoming Mediterranean cruise.”

I hope Dorothy enjoys her lunch, I thought, keeping my bitterly sarcastic reaction to myself. Abby seemed to be in an equable mood, and I didn’t want to upset it. “Brooks Atkinson gave Gray a good review, too,” I told her. “You want to read it?”

“Absolutely not!” she said emphatically, emphasis on the not. “My heart’s broken enough as it is. Life’s so freaking unfair! I can’t stand reading these bubbling accolades. They would have made Gray so happy-but they make me want to kill somebody.”

So much for equable.

I refolded the newspapers with the articles about Gray on top, then set them down on the seat beside me, hoping other passengers would pick them up and read about Gray’s success. If more people read the reviews, I reasoned (i.e., intentionally deluded myself), it would be like keeping Gray and his budding career alive just a little while longer.

“We should have changed our focockta clothes, you know!” Abby griped, still worrying about the wardrobe. “It isn’t proper for us to go uptown like this. We should have put on dresses. Or at least skirts.”

“Since when do you care about being proper? I never even heard you use that word before. And besides, this is the hottest Fourth of July weekend in history. The way I see it, all clothing rules have been suspended until Tuesday.”

“Have it your own way,” she said, with a disparaging sniff. “But when everybody stares at us like we’re creatures from another planet, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

When we emerged from the subway at Times Square and began walking up Broadway toward the theater, I saw that Abby was right. All of the women were wearing summer dresses, seamed stockings, and heels. Some even had on hats and white gloves. I’d have bet my last dollar they had on girdles, too. (From the stiff and snooty way they were glaring at Abby and me, you could tell they weren’t too comfortable.)

“See?” Abby said, smirking. “You should have listened to me. If we ever get inside the theater and get to talk to anybody in the show, they’re gonna wonder why the hell we’re dressed like this. Nobody wears capris and halter tops on Broadway! They’ll probably think we’re streetwalkers from 42nd Street, or lowly extras from the

Bus Stop cast.”

Bingo.

“Hey, that’s a great idea!” I yelped. “I’ve been wondering what kind of cover we could use-what we could say to make our sudden appearance backstage, plus our nosy fixation on Gray, seem logical and reasonable. And this is it, Ab! It’s like somebody wrote the script just for us. It’s so perfect I’m beginning to believe it myself.”

“Have you flipped your wig, babe?” Abby gaped at me as if I’d just turned into a unicorn. “You think we should pretend to be streetwalkers? Ha! That’s a total crack-up! I could probably carry it off, but you-you look more like a peach-picker than a prostitute.”

“No, you’ve got the wrong idea!” I took her by the arm and pulled her off to the right of the crowded sidewalk, under the overhang of a souvenir shop entryway where we could talk. The Morosco Theatre was just two blocks up and I wanted to get our stories straight before we got there.

“We’re going to be

Bus Stop extras!” I crowed, flushed with excitement. “It’s the best of all possible disguises. Thank God you thought of it! Bus Stop is playing at the Music Box Theatre, you know, and that’s right across the street from the Morosco. Did you ever hear anything so ideal in your life? We can say we’re in intermission or between scenes or something, and that we just hopped across the street to see our good friend Gray and congratulate him on his fabulous performance last night.”

Abby frowned, then arched one of her eyebrows to a peak. “I don’t know, Paige. Sounds pretty sticky to me. How do we know the people in the

Cat cast don’t know all the people in the Bus cast? And what if they’ve seen each other’s shows? Then the Cat people would know that the outfits we’re wearing aren’t real Bus costumes.”

“So what? The styles are pretty similar, so if anybody wonders about the costumes, we can say we just got new ones. And if anybody questions our place in the cast, we can say we just got hired to replace a couple of extras who just got fired.”

“But if we’re supposed to be Gray’s good friends, how can we go around asking a bunch of questions about him? Won’t that seem just a dinky bit suspicious?”

“Okay, okay!” I said, hooking my arm through Abby’s, tugging her back out to the sidewalk, and urging her onward toward 45th Street. “You’ve got a point,” I admitted, “but it’s really easy to fix. We don’t have to be Gray’s good friends. We can be more like fans, or recent acquaintances from his acting class. That way our curiosity will seem totally natural.” I quickened our pace, but kept on talking. “Don’t you see what a slick strategy this is? It’s so tight it’s right. I’m telling you, Ab, this plan is foolproof!”

“That depends on who the fool is,” she said, still skeptical. “And in this case, it could be you.”

WHEN WE ARRIVED, STILL ARM-IN-ARM, at 45th Street, I tried to pilot Abby around the corner toward the Morosco. But she suddenly started straining in the opposite direction. “Come across the street for a second,” she insisted, charging like a bull for the Loew’s State movie theater and dragging me along with her.

“Stop!” I hollered. “What do you think you’re doing? I told you before-I’m not going to the movies!”

“Don’t be a goose, Paige. This isn’t about that!” she said, steadily pulling me toward the brightly lit marquee.

The Seven Year Itch was playing. Even if I hadn’t been able to read the title on the signboard, I would have known what movie it was from the enormous banner hanging above. The four-story-high image of Marilyn Monroe-standing legs apart on the subway grate while a blast of air blows her skirt up past her panties-was a pretty good clue.

Abby drew me into the shade under the movie marquee and then backed me up against the exterior wall of the theater, next to a large glass-enclosed poster display case. Inside the case was another big image of Marilyn. She was wearing a low-cut dress and leaning over in such a way as to expose yet another amazing aspect of her celebrated anatomy.

“Stand still,” Abby ordered, opening her purse and taking out a tube of lipstick. “If you’re going to pass for a

Bus Stop extra, you have to wear a hell of a lot more makeup than you’ve got on. You need some greasepaint, baby!” She mashed her fingers against my face and began smearing a thick coat of red lipstick on my stretched-out lips.

“Ith thith reewy nethethary?” I whined-well, tried to, anyway. (I’m not a big fan of heavy cosmetics. And I didn’t like the way people were gawking at us.)

“Of course it’s necessary,” Abby insisted. “Now, shut up! Stop moving your lips.” She finished applying the lipstick and then started to work on my eyes, slathering the lids with bright blue shadow and blackening the lashes with gobs of mascara. After that came the eyebrow pencil and the face powder and the rouge. And when she was through with me, she added a few finishing touches to her own makeup.

“There!” she said, dropping the last weapon in her arsenal of cosmetics back into her purse and snapping the clasp closed. “All done. Now that wasn’t so bad, was it?”