– OK.
She spins again.
– But not really.
She flicks another slide. Two shapes. One with a corkscrew of material sprouting from its side, looking like it’s stretching toward a hole in the other blob.
– I mean, that happened and all, but what you were was more like you were triggered.
She points at the screen.
– Like this.
She taps a button.
The corkscrew grows.
– The Vyrus, active, it’s got a prong. Usually. Some Vyrus doesn’t. Active, inactive. No prong.
The tip enters the hole on the other blob and begins to twist, drawing them closer together.
– Inactive, the Vyrus has a, and I know it’s all very sexual and all, but I didn’t make it up so don’t blame me, but it has a hole. The inactive Vyrus.
It twists in until the two shapes are snug together.
– Watch, this is the gross part.
The blob with the corkscrew starts pushing into the tiny hole, pulling itself inside.
– Gah.
With a final lurch it disappears, as if it were sucked in at the end.
– Aaand now we get an eclipse phase where everything looks normal for a while. We can zip past that.
She taps a button, the image vibrates, blurs, stops when she taps the button again.
– Here.
The blob shivers, pulses and turns inside out, erupting from the tiny hole, coalescing, and suddenly still. Warted now, in a violent yellow, and with a prickle of corkscrews clustered where the hole was.
– And that’s what happened.
I’m looking at the screen. She’s looking at me.
I shake my head.
She nods.
– An active Vyral cell, with a nucleus stolen from a cell in its host’s body, enters a new host and infects an inactive Vyrus with no nucleus. Gives it the tools to reproduce. And it does.
She taps the screen.
– This little fucker will screw just about any cell it can get to. Screw in, mutate, pop out more and more specialized components. I mean. And now, now, it’s not just that it’s active and ready to go to work on the host where before it was just this dormant scrap of HERV all this time, hitching a ride on the genome, now it’s ready to drop into a new body and look for another bit of Vyral HERV with the right kind of hole.
She waves a hand.
– It’s a randy dude, alright.
She twists toward me.
– See, Joe, that’s what I mean. I mean, it was always there in you. Just waiting. Just waiting for the right person to come along and wake it up.
She touches my arm.
– What it is, is it’s you. Just on the outside now.
I think of the worm, eating its own tail. The kind of sense that makes, that’s the kind of sense what she’s saying makes. Follow it around all the way, you come back to the head. Take that last bite, and then what? Where do you go from there?
Some stuff, I can’t swallow.
I walk over to Phil and kick him fully awake.
– Get up and roll me a smoke.
He gets up and rolls me a smoke and I light it.
– Predo’s gonna be here in a little while.
Amanda is watching the recording play out again.
– Uh-huh.
I look at the door to the living quarters.
– You and Sela the only ones left in here?
– I mean.
– Because it’s time to go now. I got a plan for how we get out and past Predo, but we got to start now.
– Really, I mean.
– So if anyone else is here we need to get them together and move.
– Joe.
On the screen, the active Vyrus cell is infecting the other again.
Amanda watches.
– It’s not like I’m going to let you take her with you.
– I figured you and Sela would both come.
The new Vyrus explodes out of itself.
– High school diploma or not, Joe, you’re not stupid. Don’t pretend.
Phil’s by the exit with his hand on the knob.
– Someone say something about leaving?
I’ve got a hand on the door to the living quarters.
– For the sake of argument, Amanda, say I am that stupid.
She lets go with a good old-fashioned bored-with-the-world teenager sigh like she used to do when I first met her.
– I’m not going to let you take her with you.
I’m pushing the door open.
Amanda is restarting the Vyral infection.
– You can’t take Chubby’s daughter.
The door is open.
On the bed, legs twisted together, a teenage pregnant girl and a boy, sleeping.
I look at Amanda.
She gets up from her chair.
– I need her here.
She crosses to me, pointing back at her monitors.
– This is, I mean, this is just getting started. A cure, that’s still what, I mean, all this.
She lifts her arms to the building around us.
– Why? Because a cure. And I mean, Predo, whatever, because we’re not afraid. We have.
She chews the ends of her hair.
– We have stuff, Joe. We’re not defenseless girls.
She lets the hair fall from the corner of her mouth.
– And I just need her. Is it rocket science? It’s not.
We both look at Chubby’s sleeping daughter.
– Joe, you had, what you had, you had a girlfriend? Right. Something happened. She was sick. OK. I’ve heard the stories. It’s like, Joe, your private life is like gossip central. This girl you had hidden all secret. And, bits and pieces, I hear, she was sick. And you tried to infect her. But she wasn’t Vyrus positive to start with. So when your Vyral cells went into her, they just killed what they found. Because there was no socket that fit them. She wasn’t like you. And before that, you were with her for, I mean, I hear it was years, and the thing is, knowing you and what all, we think, people say, you and her, you never hooked up. Really. All the way. Because you were afraid it would infect her. And you only tried at the end ‘cause she was dying. I mean.
She lifts her eyebrows.
– Half it’s just impossibly romantic, and half it’s just impossibly lame.
I’m thinking about what Predo said about how I’m spontaneous with bullets. I’m thinking he’s right. I’m thinking maybe it’s better I don’t have any to use right now.
Still, I want them.
She must not see it in my eye, because she won’t shut up.
– Because it just doesn’t work that way. I mean, Joe, and I don’t want to hurt you, but you could have been fucking your brains out. But you’re not special that way, not knowing. Everything anyone knows about the Vyrus, it’s all anecdotal. And there’s only so many people to ask. And a guy like you, I’m guessing that asking about the facts of life wasn’t what you were comfortable with. Which I totally get. I mean, my mom practically gave me a demo when I was nine, and did I need that? No. So someone mentioned something around you about how no one knew how the Vyrus really transmitted and you went all celibate. But them.
She points at the kids on the bed.
– They didn’t care. They were just into each other. Just hot kids who wanted to do it.
She shrugs.
– Fucking won’t infect Delilah. But the baby. I need to see what happens with the baby is all.
She looks up at me.