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That got all three of the kids back in the dome-tent in a hurry. Jahv and Keyro were perfectly fine, Keyro having returned to his video, and Jahv storing the holocron device in a holding place on a control panel. "Oh, hi guys!" said Jahv cheerfully. "I was afraid you'd left."

"You're okay?" asked Martin.

"Yes, we're fine." replied Jahv.

"Okay — what did you do?" demanded Keith. "The last time I saw a retreat like that was at school, when Bubba Trukowski got sick over his limburger cheese pizza."

"Just a little holocron trickery." replied Jahv. "And some experience with some of your military movies. There's some really pompous, scary commanding generals in those things. Ever see 'Patton'?"

The boys started to giggle. Even if they hadn't seen the movie, they got the idea.

"Wish I could've seen that." said Keith, finally stifling the giggles. "Although I'm surprised they didn't wonder about this mess of a shirt I'm wearing."

"They probably figured it was just some T-shirt pattern." said Davy.

"You mean it's NOT?" exclaimed Martin. "Keith, did your stepdad do that to you?"

Keith fell silent.

"Yeah, we've still got a problem here, even though we got rid of the military, hopefully for good." said Davy. "Keith, enough is enough. Your stepfather can't keep doing this to you."

"It wasn't just him." insisted Keith. "I really did fall over a table."

"After he grabbed you and you pulled away." said Jahv. "Maybe he hasn't beaten you that severely yet, but doesn't this sort of thing just tend to get worse?"

"It's against the law, even as it is, I'd think." said Davy. "One of these days he might do something that not even Jahv can fix!"

"Come on, Keith, you can't let him keep hurting you like this." urged Martin. "You've got to report this to somebody. I'm sure my parents would help."

"Look, guys," said Keith, "I appreciate it, but as much as I hate being around him, I don't wanna end up in some special agency, or stuck in foster care, or maybe forced to leave town with some strangers that some court judge says are supposed to take care of me. I'd miss all of you too much."

Martin's eyes were filled with tears. Keith was his best friend. Davy was close to crying, too. But he was thinking, as well. There had to be some way to get Mr. Dillinger to cut Keith some slack. Then he noticed the holocron. "I've got an idea."

Keith looked up, skeptically. "What are you — no, don't tell me. I'm not sure I want to know. Just don't do anything that's gonna get me into even more trouble, okay? Just — just leave it alone. Hell, if I can survive long enough, I'll be grown up and can legally move out."

"Okay, if that's what you want." said Davy sadly. "Maybe you'd better head home before you get into more trouble."

"Yeah, right." said Keith, leaving the tent. Davy, Jahv, and the rest watched him depart.

"I hate this." said Martin. "Keith's my best friend. We can't just let him keep getting hurt."

Davy grinned slyly. "Sometimes you gotta help people whether they want it or not."

"You sound like you have a plan." said Jahv. "And I suspect it involves our technology."

Davy kept grinning, his mind already working. First, he'd need to convince his parents that he wanted to spend the night in his treehouse. Then… "What works on the military, oughtta work on civilians…"

Keith rode his bike home, and, not surprisingly, his stepfather threatened to beat him. But his mother got the man to back off. For his part, Mr. Dillinger was surprised that Keith was uninjured. He was certain Keith's nose had been broken, and for that matter, so was his mother, but except for the blood on the boy's shirt, Keith was unhurt. But for his «misbehavior», Keith was sent to his room without any dinner. Later that night, Keith crept downstairs to get something to eat. His mom and stepfather had turned in early that night. Keith grabbed a couple of toaster waffles from the freezer, toasted them as quietly as he could, poured a glass of milk, and started to tip-toe back to his room.

And ran smack into Davy, Jahv, and Keyro coming through the living room. Keith almost yelled, but checked himself just in time. "What the hell-?!" he whispered. "How did you get in here?"

Jahv held up a tiny device. "Electronic lockpick."

"Besides," said Davy. "You're just dreaming, Keith. Go back to bed."

Keith glared at Davy. "Get off it. What the hell are you three doing in here?"

"Helping you, whether you want it or not," said Davy, with a slight edge to his voice, "and I don't think you can do much about it without waking your parents, and that'd just get you into more trouble."

Keith was angry, but he also knew that Davy and the two aliens had him over the proverbial barrel. "Okay, you three. I can't stop you. But I swear if whatever you're up to gets me into trouble, I'm taking it out on the lot of you." Keith resisted the urge to either stomp up the steps to his bedroom, or to slam the door. He scarfed the waffles and hoped he'd be long asleep before those three idiots did whatever it was they intended.

Two minutes later, Davy and two aliens, one holding the holocron, silently crept up the stairs and found the Dillinger's master bedroom.

And less than a minute later…

"DILLINGER!" roared a thunderous, echoing voice. Keith woke up to find Davy at his bedside, grinning like an idiot and telling Keith to stay put. Keith now had at least a general idea of what was going on. He grinned, slightly. He was still skeptical, however.

The Dillingers woke up to find their bedroom turned into a nightmare miasma of outer space. Their bed seemed to be floating on nothing. Stars, comets, nebulae soared past. Suns exploded in the distance. Planets flew out of their orbits and roared dangerously close.

And standing at the foot of the bed were two of the most horrific-looking aliens one could possibly imagine. These things would scare Klingons. They'd scare those acid-blooded critters that Sigourney Weaver kept picking fights with. Easily over seven feet tall, one had green skin, the other lavendar. Impossibly muscular, they had deepset eyes, long, flowing white hair, antennae on the backs of their heads, ridged foreheads, and they were decked out in battle armor that was something out of a Japanese animator's worst nightmare. Each brandished a huge, bladed weapon that looked like it was part axe and part sword, and was double bladed at both ends. Their voices were deep and echoing.

Mr. Dillinger swore in utter shock. Mrs. Dillinger screamed.

"We need to have words, Mr. Dillinger." said the green alien. "You've been abusing a friend of ours. Your stepson Keith."

"Oh, damn." said Dillinger meekly. "Those military bastards were right. There are aliens out there."

"We took care of them earlier today. Now it's your turn." said the lavendar alien.

Dillinger remained slightly skeptical. Everything he saw around him — this just wasn't possible. "How do I know this is real?"

"Your son's nose was broken this morning as a result of your actions." said the green alien. "We fixed it."

Dillinger felt a cold shudder run down his spine.

"And if that isn't enough…" said the lavendar alien, raising his weapon, "just in case you think to write this off as a dream…"

"Or a nightmare…" added the green alien.

"Remember this!" yelled the lavendar alien, bringing his weapon down and leaving a large mark on the bedpost at the foot of the bed.

"Start treating Keith with more care and respect, Dillingers." warned the green alien. "Or next time, your furniture will not be all that suffers. And be warned, any attempt to find us, will only result in tragedy for all concerned."