I saw Rashid in the distance. He signaled to me, making a fanlike gesture with his fingers that meant, see you later, so I said to Maturana, listen, all I know about you is what the conference gave us and that’s why I’d like to get to know you, I mean, my God, you must have seen some pretty harsh things in your life, I guess? The man twisted the hairs of his beard and said, yes indeed, brother, I’ve seen the devil in Technicolor and black and white, and I’ve even seen him in the mirror, brother, because between you and me I can tell you I came out of the garbage truck with the engine on, or when they’d already closed the lid and were throwing earth on top, really, everything’s passed through this body, smack, mushrooms, weed, coke, crack, freebase, I was so addicted, brother, I’d lost all sense of shame, until one day I touched bottom and I won’t tell you how it was to wake up the day after, man, that was really rough, no kidding, try to imagine the scene, opening your eyes on the sidewalk of an avenue at three in the afternoon, with the sun beating down, pants torn, no shoes on your feet, so thirsty you could have drunk a gallon of gasoline, the syringe still in your forearm and a cop slapping you and saying, hey, hey, wake up, what’s your name? and you making an effort to remember something as basic as your name, who the fuck you are and what you’re called, that isn’t an easy question to answer, brother, and then seeing them almost dying of disgust as they lift you up and put you in the back of a patrol car with the bars around, and hearing them say, this scumbag fell out of the garbage truck, I’d rather clean a dog’s vomit with my tongue than touch him again, I’d rather kiss an ass with colitis than smell the breath of this bag of germs, anyway, things like that, and then they put me in jail for destitution, vagrancy, a long way from where I’d grown up because all this happened in the north, in a little town in West Virginia I’d gone to for some business that turned out badly, and I went straight to prison, my friend, I’m not telling you the half of it, but it was there that I met the man who saved me, the Jesus Christ of the Caribbean, anyway, that’s the story I’m going to tell, so it’s better if I don’t tell you the rest now.
Did you see Sabina Vedovelli? he asked. She’s going to be the center of attention: there’s a rumor around that she’s going to tell her life story, and I said, I’m new at this, I don’t know what kind of things are being rumored. Maturana continued: may God forgive me if I’m slandering anybody, I’m only repeating what I’ve heard, but they say she’s been the lover of Mafiosi and politicians and all kinds of VIPs, they say Berlusconi, you remember the bald guy who was president of Italy a few years ago and became famous for banging young girls? and I said yes, of course, and he continued, well, they say one night he gave her as a gift to the president of Russia, who was on a state visit, and at dinner Sabina got up on the table and danced and threw plates and glasses on the floor, and then she lifted her skirt and went closer to the men, who must have been drunk and coked-up, and she pulled aside her G-string and peed in their faces, she was aiming streams of urine at them while they sang the balalaika or some crap like that, and they mixed it with champagne and drank it, and then they both screwed her, one from in front and the other from behind, on the table, and they gave her a tremendous fricassee of cock, that’s what they say, I don’t have any evidence, but what a life, eh? and they also say that she always carries in her suitcase a pair of underpants that belonged to Pope John Paul II and that she worships them as if they were the Turin Shroud and they say she lost her virginity at the age of eighteen, because until then she only took it up the ass, and that the first man who gave it to her from the front and took her virginity was a pilot of the Swedish airline SAS, flying from Rome to Gothenburg, who came out of the cabin to take a leak in the middle of the night and found her in the bathroom, with her pants down and crying with fear, and when the giant, who was probably called something like Olaf the Bastard, saw her, he closed the door, took out his cock and impaled her on it as they crossed the Apennines, and they say that’s why she kept the taste for screwing in exotic places, even while parachuting or at the bottom of the sea, and that she’s had sex with various kinds of living creatures, not all of them human, in fact human isn’t necessarily what she likes best, anyway, brother, everybody says something, because it’s like this Vedovelli woman is from another planet.
Suddenly, I heard a voice beside me saying, are you the writer? It was a young woman with rectangular glasses. Hi, she said, I’m Marta Joonsdottir, I’m from Iceland, I write for the Ferhoer Bild in Reykjavik, I’m here to cover the conference, my readers would be interested to hear about your opinions, maybe you could grant me an interview, so I said, yes of course, it would be an honor, although I’m not quite sure how interested your readers would be, and then I said, let me introduce the ex-Reverend Walter José Maturana, and Maturana looked at the girl and said, it’s nice to see a young woman who’s pure of heart, with her soul shining out of her eyes, and she replied, thanks for the compliment, Father, but don’t be deceived, these eyes have already seen everything an adult person ought to see and more, I know about your evangelical work and I’d like to talk about that as the conference goes on, and he said, whenever you like, I’ll try not to die first.
Just as he said that, there was another coup de théâtre, a second bomb going off, even louder than the first, which made the building shake. A murmur went through the room, there were a few stifled cries, and the candles flickered. Two seconds later, the musicians struck up again as loudly as ever and the guests continued talking, all except Marta Joonsdottir, whose eyes screwed up like frightened squirrels, how can this be normal? she cried, and I replied, I don’t think it is, it isn’t normal for anybody, but everyone pretends because they’re too embarrassed to say anything or they don’t believe it. Marta looked at me gravely and said: one of these days there’ll be a flicker of light and a moment later we’ll all be dead, and that’ll be normal too. Before she walked away she added: I’ll look for you.