It was actually his father who found him in the room, and on seeing him asked, what are you doing with that, Guny? The young man replied, I don’t know, daddy, I felt a irresistible urge to put it on, and now, with it on, I look at the horizon and the lights of the distant boats and feel as if my spirit had taken flight, and then his father said, well, I’ll leave you with your spirit, but don’t even think of going down to the living room like that. When you’ve finished put everything back where you found it, is it your aunt Adelaide’s? The young man nodded and turned again toward the sea, and a while later came down in his normal clothes. His father saw him and gave a sigh of relief.
Soon afterwards, while still on Capri, Gunard met Renate Schlink, a young Swiss woman who was spending her summer vacation there. They chatted one afternoon on the beach and she showed great interest in his stories about chess, which were the young man’s whole life. When night fell, as in a scene from a novel, they entered the sea holding hands, watched the stars come out, and kissed each other in the warm waters of the Tyrrhenian Sea. Renate had already had some experiences with men, and she it was who threw aside her bikini and rummaged in Gunard’s swimming trunks. Going with the flow, he penetrated her, stunned by the revelation of what a conversation with a woman could lead to. Then he felt a trembling in his pelvis and was about to withdraw, but she stopped him and received his seed, which much to the surprise of both of them reached its target. One afternoon three months later, as Gunard was analyzing a position in a game between Mikhail Tal and Botvinnik, he received a call from Zurich in which Renate said to him in an anguished voice, listen, you want to hear something strange? You’re going to be a father!
Soon afterwards, there was a hastily arranged civil wedding in Monte Carlo, and the two families, who knew each other from Capri, showed great understanding toward the two young people and were even happy, in spite of the suddenness of the whole thing and the fact that it had all come about by accident. Gunard’s father had an additional reason to feel happy. He was relieved to have this proof of his son’s masculinity.
After the wedding, Renate and Gunard settled in Gothenburg, in an apartment owned by the Flø family in the Ulmbjorg district — in a building that today houses the Hotel Osaka — but in spite of the rich, cushioned life they led, Renate Schlink, thanks to the dark, oppressive atmosphere of those far regions of the world and its obvious effects on the psyche of anyone born in more southern latitudes, went through a crisis and said, I don’t know what you think or want to do, but I’m going to have my child in Switzerland. Gunard, who had a conciliatory personality, left with her and soon afterwards their son was born in Zurich and christened Ebenezer.
Two months later, Theodor Momsen joined him and settled into an apartment on Heinestrasse, very close to the Schlink residence, so that he could continue the young man’s chess training.
Gunard would spend the day in his study facing the Lindenhof, studying games with Momsen, while Renate remained in her parents’ house with little Ebenezer. One night, coming back later than usual, the young woman went up to the study to say hello to her husband and gave a cry of horror. Gunard was sitting by the window, with the light off. He had put on one of her dresses and a blonde wig. What are you doing? she asked, on the verge of tears, switching the light on, but he said, please turn that off, I prefer the dark, I’m looking at the moon.
Obviously I’m not talking about that! she said, I want to know what you’re doing in those clothes! Oh, he said, it’s just that I feel freer this way, as if my spirit could fly all the way to the moon and sit down in one of its craters and think in solitude or think about how strange and miraculous it is to be alive while I travel those lunar valleys and linger before the vast depths, and Renate wept bitterly, and said, you’re going crazy, darling, chess is driving you crazy, you have to stop playing and live like other people, go shopping, look at what’s in the windows, meet friends, have a few beers, that’s what you need. Her tears turned into a nervous breakdown.
She tore the wig and the dress off him, which only made things worse, because she saw with horror that he had also put on her underwear — bra and panties — and Gunard said, you want me to be somebody else and go to bars, but I’m fine just staying here by the window, looking at the moon, don’t you see? I’m not harming anyone, not you, not little Ebenezer, and when he said this she replied, be grateful that he’s just a baby and doesn’t know anything, how do you think he’d feel if he saw his father dressed as a woman? Gunard looked at her and replied, he’d be curious and would ask me why I do it, and I’d answer the same way I answered you, I’d tell him the truth, and he’d have to understand, Renate, because he’s my son and he’d be happy to see his father at peace.
The next day Renate called her father-in-law in Gothenburg and told him what she had seen, and he asked, but do you have normal relations? She said yes, many times, she had no complaints about that side of things. Then Gunard’s father replied: it’ll pass, it’s something he’s had since he was a child and finds it hard to let go of, but it’ll pass, believe me, and by the time she put the phone down she was feeling somewhat reassured. From that night Gunard’s father and Renate sealed a secret alliance based on fear of something they did not dare name, which was the possibility that Gunard was a homosexual and was hiding it, or refusing to accept it.
Renate started taking precautions, like keeping her closet locked and collecting her used clothes every day. She also, very reluctantly, started not coming home at nights. The routine had been that she would spend the day with little Ebenezer in her mother’s country house outside Zurich and come back late in the afternoon. But now when the time came for her to leave, she would feel a great sense of unease, so she would call Gunard and say, I’m staying here, Eby has a cough and I don’t want him to be in the cold air, and he would reply, don’t worry, darling, I’m going to miss you, but I’ll see you tomorrow.
During this period, Gunard usually stayed up late studying games, alone or with Momsen, and now that Renate was staying away more frequently, three or even four times a week, he would sleep in the study and the next day the maids or even Renate would find him asleep over the chess table, a cup of cold coffee beside him. He has to give up this evil game, she would say, the damn thing will be the death of him.
She immediately launched a campaign against chess, deciding that she would never leave him alone but constantly create things they urgently had to do together, always involving little Ebenezer. When it was his time to study with Momsen, Renate would press him to go with her on some errand or other that, according to her, could not be postponed, and he would obey. But one night he said, Renate, I want to get back to chess, so don’t schedule any activities between nine in the morning and five in the afternoon. She lost her temper and said, it’s obvious you don’t care about our life, it’s obvious what happens to your son doesn’t interest you, it’s obvious I don’t matter to you. When she saw him looking at her in silence, without contradicting her or arguing, she lost her temper and said: what you want is to be alone so you can wear my clothes and my underwear! And she added, beside herself, God knows what you get up to with Mr. Momsen when I don’t see the two of you, do you act like a woman? does he like my panties? was he the one who taught you to dress like that?
Gunard said nothing, unable to think up any answer to such accusations. He merely shrugged his shoulders and looked at her curiously, until she burst into tears, struck her chest, and head and said, admit you’re having an affair with him, admit you’re a lousy queer and you love him, admit you’d give your life to be with him all the time and sleep with him and spend Christmas with him, admit it, monster, admit it now!