He took a deep drag on his filtered Camel. “Don’t give me that Officer Healthy routine. I noticed you breathing it in. Go ahead. I won’t tell anyone.”
He leaned his body toward Ellie’s as he extended the cigarette toward her. She suddenly understood all those songs by men about teenage girls as temptresses.
“You’re sweet but half my age.”
“Older women know what they’re doing.”
“And Julia Whitmire didn’t?”
“Julia was cool.”
“All the money your parents are dropping on Casden and the best you can do is cool?”
“I can get fancy if you want. She was sophisticated. Tolerant. Inquisitive. Adventurous. Nonconformist. How about that? Sometimes simple’s better, though. If you knew her, you’d know what I mean. She was . . . cool.”
“Were you dating?”
He smiled, but with his downcast gaze and the accompanying sigh, the overall effect was more sad than cocky. “I don’t date. Julia didn’t date. We were fuck buddies. Oops, there I go again with the simple words.”
“It’s a strange way to talk about a girl you were intimate with, just a day after her death.”
“Julia would have said the same about me. We weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend, if that’s what you were hoping to find.”
“Too conformist for you?”
“Yeah, if you must know.”
“Regardless of the terminology, don’t most teenagers still couple up?”
“Our crowd isn’t most teenagers. We’re not from that segment of society that becomes police officers or bookkeepers or teachers.”
“I’m afraid I’m missing your point.”
Marcus spoke with the kind of practiced assuredness that revealed he’d delivered this lecture to others without challenge. He was used to pontificating to a deferential audience, most likely other kids eager to soak in even an ounce of what they perceived as profound wisdom. “We are told from day one that we are special. That we’re not like the other, little, people. That we have to excel. That we have to be the best of the best of the best. What was your summer job in high school, Detective?”
“I sold clothes at the mall.” She lied. He didn’t need to know that she’d flipped burgers at Orange Julius when she wasn’t trying to score scholarship money on the Kansas beauty pageant circuit.
“See? The girls I know? If they’re interested in fashion, they’re supposed to have internships with Marc Jacobs or, better yet, Anna Wintour. Me? I like nightlife. Entertainment. The creation of a lifestyle. I lined up an internship with the Thomas Keller Restaurant Group.”
She recognized the name of a high-end restaurateur.
“Impressive.”
He stomped out his cigarette butt, then immediately lit another smoke. “Not if you’re Simon Graze.”
“I take it that’s your father?”
“He says the restaurant business is for gays and immigrants, whatever the hell that means. He finally compromised by getting me an internship with a hotel group his friend runs instead. Even that he sees as slumming. People like Julia Whitmire and I don’t date or go steady or whatever you want to call it, because we’ve got enough pressure on us as it is. It’s more like we work hard, so we party hard.”
“And does a drug like Adderall help with that?”
He shrugged. “Sometimes. I’ve pulled a couple of all-nighters with a little bump. Ritalin makes a good combo. I’ve got to be careful, though, because that plus the Xanax throws me off a little.”
She started to laugh but realized he was serious. She was starting to understand why that psychologist in the video debate had been so weary of these prescriptions for children.
“Where do kids get the Adderall?”
He stifled a laugh. “Sorry. Kids. It sounds funny, is all. Some kids get prescriptions for ADHD, and most of those kids take some for themselves and dole out the rest. It’s easier to buy prescription drugs than alcohol, really. Adderall, Ritalin, Oxi, Valium. No problemo. Xanax is my fifth antidepressant since I was thirteen. I’ve got friends on Paxil, Prozac, Lexapro—you name it. What’s any of it got to do with Julia slitting her wrists?”
“I never said she slit her wrists.”
“Come on. Every kid north of Fifty-eighth Street knows about it by now. And I’m trying to save you some time by telling you how it is. Julia was truly a fantastic girl. But if you want to understand her, you can’t look at it through the eyes of your inner sixteen-year-old Jersey City mall girl. A girl like Julia’s been giving head since she was twelve. She started calling her mother Katherine when she was thirteen, around the time she tried her first blow. I’m sad she’s gone, but shit happens. A couple months ago, a guy in my class shot himself up with enough heroin to kill a herd of elephants. It was on Valentine’s Day. Very romantic, right?”
That would account for the “second time in a semester” comment she’d overheard at the headmistress’s office.
“So you’re saying some people just can’t handle the pressure?”
“Apparently not.”
“According to some of her other friends, Julia had been distracted lately. Busy, like she had a pretty serious relationship going with someone.”
“Well, it wasn’t me.”
“But did you also notice a change in Julia’s schedule? Was she around less recently?”
He took a drag from his cigarette. When he shrugged as he exhaled, it was as if a part of the chip on his shoulder slipped off. “Yeah, now that you mention it. Usually she was the one who’d call me to hook up—almost always when she was feeling kind of shitty about herself or her family or whatever.”
“So you helped her out by sleeping with her when she was low?”
“We’re both fucked up. What do you want? But I hadn’t heard from her for at least a couple of months. And the last few times I buzzed her, she basically blew me off.”
“Did you ask her why?”
“To what end? Not like we were great loves or anything. I figured she wasn’t interested anymore. No big deal.”
“If she was seeing someone seriously, do you have any thoughts about who it would have been?”
“No one on the prep scene, that’s for sure.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I would have heard about it. And Julia wasn’t the type to get all googly-eyed for some high school kid.”
“I hear she had a thing for older guys.”
“Anyone she couldn’t have. Ooh, you know who you should talk to?” He sounded excited by the prospect. “Mr. Wallace.”
“Who’s that?”
“The forty-year-old physics teacher all the girls pine for. Julia was totally hot for him, and she’s not one to take no for an answer. Maybe dreamy Kenneth Wallace is your mystery man. Now, wouldn’t that be scandalous? Margaret Carter will stroke out on the front steps.”
“The headmistress?”
“She’s in full-on bunker mode. If she could shut down the school without losing her job, she would have done it hours ago. She visited all the morning classes personally to make sure we all knew that talking to the press would be strictly frowned upon—meaning one less gold star for our college admission letters.”
Ellie pictured all those online profiles for Casden students that had suddenly been “unavailable.”
“Is that why I couldn’t see some of the students’ Facebook pages this morning?”
Suddenly he didn’t want to answer. “Bill Whitmire’s kid offs herself? The second Casden student this semester? The media will be all over this. We’re hunkered in the bunker.”