Her lips parted to utter a reply, but he released her, taking his mask from her and donning it once more. She watched him, confused as he turned to look behind, to scan the figures around them. He gripped her hand, and she squeezed it in her own. He spun around, and she soon found herself following him through the press of costumed bodies. Where was he taking her? What did he mean, she shouldn’t be here? Hadn’t he wanted her here? With him?
Fed by the new hard surge from the drums, the dancing turned to thrashing and the costumed bodies closed in, making it almost impossible to keep hold of him as he steered her through the tangle of ghouls, devils, dark faeries, and vampires.
At last they broke through the press of bodies. He led her toward the far wall, where several partygoers stared, their painted features sullen and apathetic. Varen drew her along, moving faster.
She tugged against him, attempting to rein him in. She was tired of being in the dark, surrounded by shadows and ominous forms that always knew more than she did. She was ready for answers. She tried to loosen her hand from his, but his grip only tightened. She tugged again, and finally he swung around.
“Tell me what’s happening.”
“Not here.” He grabbed her wrist and they were moving once more. He pushed through a gathering of Jack the Ripper look-alikes, and ahead, hidden within a recess of shadows, Isobel saw a door.
They slipped around a pierced couple pressed against one wall, their arms wrapped around each other, their faces molded together, locked in a deep kiss. Varen opened the door. He drew her inside, pulling a string for light, and shut the door behind them.
They were in what appeared to be a small office. At least, the tiny space had probably once served as an office. It smelled of sawdust and stale tobacco. An unfinished desk sat in one corner, a crooked corkboard nailed to the wall above it. A few sheets of paper, still pinned there, yellowed and brittle with age, stirred in the breeze of their entrance. A broken chair, overturned atop a threadbare throw rug, acted as the room’s centerpiece. Beyond that and the cord-and-bulb ceiling light overhead, there was nothing. Outside, the music raged on, though muted by the boundary of the four surrounding walls.
Varen, removing his mask and setting it on the desk, gathered the broken chair from the floor and lifted it. He hooked the backrest beneath the doorknob. The action caused Isobel’s skin to prickle. What was he barricading them against?
“Varen?”
He held a hand up to silence her and paused at the door, listening.
“Varen—,” she whispered.
He swung toward her again, moving fast to her side. “Don’t say my name,” he hushed. “She can’t find you here with me. You have to hide,” he said, more to himself than to her.
“She?” He couldn’t still be worried about Lacy, could he?
His eyes, wide and anxious, snapped to hers.
She’d never seen him like this. She’d never even imagined him this way. Skittish, fearful—almost fevered. Whatever she had expected to find when she got here, it hadn’t been this. His fear, so unfamiliar, doubled hers.
“Tell me what’s happening,” she pleaded.
He shook his head. “You shouldn’t have come.”
“Stop saying that.” She gripped his jacket, her fingers clutching. “You asked me to come, remember?”
“That was a mistake.”
She wanted to shake him, to wake him up, to make him answer her.
“Varen, none of this makes any sense, and then you say something like that! Your letter—why did . . . I don’t understand anything that’s happening, and it’s happening to me, too! Tell me right now what happened to your face. Brad said—but then I saw you . . .” She shook her head, trying to sort out her thoughts, her memory. Did anything fit together? Which confusion should she start with first? “One minute you were there, the next you were gone. I looked for you but you’d disappeared, just like a ghost! And now you’re here and you won’t tell me. Why? What are those things? Why are they following me? Why did they attack Nikki and Brad? Where did they come from? What do they want?”
“They want the same thing I want!” he shouted suddenly, yanking away from her. He grabbed the mask off the desk and threw it against one wall. It shattered, shards of porcelain spraying the floor.
Hands quivering, she reached toward him.
“Don’t.” He turned his back to her, facing the door.
That word had stopped her once before. But not now. Not now that she had glimpsed through the funeral front of Varen’s own eternal Grim Facade. Despite all the dark armor, the kohl liner, the black boots and chains, she saw him clearly now. She’d peered through the curtain of that cruel calmness, through the death stare and the vampire sentiments and angst and, behind it all, had found true beauty. She looped her arms around his waist, burying her face against his jacket, against the silhouette of the dead bird. “Please tell me!”
He spun in her grip and pressed his lips to her ear, whispering. “I didn’t know it would happen like this,” he said. “I only wanted to escape. I don’t know if you can understand that.
That I only wanted to find a way to somewhere else. Even if it only lasted a little while—even if it wasn’t real. But then it was real. It was real and I couldn’t stop it.”
“What? Stop what?”
“Then I met you,” he said, his lips hovering close to hers once again. “And the dreams changed.”
His breath washed warm against her, and it made her want to surrender to him again, to feel his touch, to hold his kiss, at once petal soft and incinerating. She’d never been kissed like that before—like the shell of her soul had evaporated.
He inched closer, but paused. Outside, the music, the screaming, the voices, the sounds of the frenzied crowd—it all stopped. Silence pulsed. He pulled back, turned to look toward the door.
The room grew cold. Isobel drew in a breath. She hugged herself, shivering as she recalled the night at the ice cream shop, the time they’d spent in the freezer. It felt so long ago.
Seconds passed.
Against the walls, the dull yellow light began to move and sway. The motion threw their twin shadows this way and that against the walls and floor, making the room seem suddenly more crowded. Varen looked up, and her own gaze followed. They watched the naked bulb swing on its frayed cord, as though caught by the gust of a nonexistent breeze. Back and forth it swung, like the pendulum of a clock.
The light blinked, flickered. Darkness teased, threatening to strike.
Hoarse whispers rose up from just outside the door, a sound like dry leaves crackling over a fire.
At first they started low. So low that Isobel couldn’t be certain of what the sound was or that she was even hearing it at all. But then the voices became clearer, hissing through the crack at the bottom of the door. Something laughed. A fast shadow moved, darting like an animal.
Isobel gripped his sleeve. “What is it?”
He moved cautiously forward, positioning himself in front of her. “They’ve found us.”
39
Much of Madness
The doorknob rattled.
Isobel watched as the chair holding the door shivered and shook. Something banged into it hard, jarring the door in its frame, and she jumped, letting out a yelp.
All at once the whispers died. The door settled.
A small light, white and crystalline, like the light she had seen in the woodlands, appeared in a wink at the bottom. It traveled along the crack slowly, back and forth, as though probing for a way in. There was a sound on the other side, like the slip of gauze fabric over the wooden exterior of the door, and Isobel found herself fighting the urge to scream. Then the white light blinked out.