I let out a slow, unsteady breath.
It was so much worse than I could’ve imagined.
78
LATER THAT NIGHT—after I’d finally been able to put all of what I’d learned out of my mind for a few blessedly peaceful moments—Fang crept across the branch connecting our tree houses.
He gave a low whistle. “Penthouse, eh?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, watching the lithe movements of Fang’s body as he surveyed my new digs, his glossy black wings folded behind him. “Honeymoon suite.”
Fang turned around and cocked an eyebrow, and my stomach leaped. “Well, in that case…” He strode toward me and, in one slick move, picked me up. He carried me out to a giant hammock on one of the balconies. I think we’ve established that I’m not the type of girl who needs to actually be swept off her feet, but the suggestion in his mischievous eyes was enough to make even the most cynical assassin woozy.
We settled in together, and I was incredibly aware of the heat coming from Fang’s body, which was pressed against mine as we snuggled.
He nuzzled my neck, inhaling deeply. “Mmm. You smell so good.”
“Oh, yeah,” I said, smirking. “I call this new perfume ‘Le Jungle grime et tropical BO.’ ”
“Dirt and sweat. Very sexy.”
I laughed, but Fang’s voice was husky, and he was already leaning closer. Then his soft lips were on mine.
Everything in my body was buzzing, aching for more, but there was a kernel of guilt buried underneath it that I just couldn’t ignore.
“Fang,” I whispered.
“Mmm?” Fang mumbled, his lips brushing my neck and sending shivers through me.
I kissed him again. Lately, my life felt like a freaking rags-to-riches fairy tale, complete with the perfect guy whispering sweet nothings in my ear. This felt so easy. So right. So overdue. Everything was finally as it should be. Except…
The flip side of that was that while we were here, in paradise, chosen to be saved, humanity was about to be wiped out. It was so completely screwed up.
I sighed, pulling away from Fang’s embrace. “I’m sorry. I just keep thinking about what my mom said. Trying to make sense of it.”
“I know,” Fang said softly, brushing my knotted hair out of my eyes. “I was trying not to think about it, pretend it wasn’t happening, but it’s always there now, isn’t it? I keep thinking of my blog, all those kids reading it, dying in the way that Dr. M. described. It’s, like, totally… incomprehensible.” I couldn’t tell if it was him or me who was trembling.
I was so frustrated I wanted to scream. “We’ve been searching for something like this forever—safety, a place that could finally, really be home. And now that we have it, it’s at the expense of everyone else’s survival.”
“Welcome to the real world,” Fang said, bitterness creeping into his voice. “Where kids are raised in cages, six-year-olds are tortured for the ‘betterment of science’ ”—we both stiffened, thinking of Angel—“and a group of genocidal wackjobs can wipe out the entire planet with a bug cooked up in someone’s kitchen.”
Fang and I were silent for a long time, the trees casting shadows on our faces and the knowledge of the world’s imminent doom sitting like the Grand Canyon between us. The moon shone down on us, a giant eye, a quiet witness.
I thought back to those miserable early days in the cages at the School and the short-lived freedom afterward, when Fang just felt like a brother and Jeb actually felt like a father. When I barely knew how to survive, let alone fight. When I first heard my Voice telling me I had to save the world.
How long ago those days felt now.
“I just feel so, so old now,” I said, looking up through the leaves at the sky with its endless stars. “Like… twenty-one or something.”
Fang snickered. “We could always create a new birthday for ourselves,” he said, reminding me that we’d done that once.
“Seriously. How ridiculous is it that we can’t legally drink alcohol, but the fate of the whole freaking world is on our shoulders?”
Fang shifted in the hammock so he could peer down at my face in the moonlight, a wry half smile on his lips. “Since when do you care about what’s legal?” I jabbed him in the ribs. Then his gravelly voice turned serious again, and I felt like he was looking right into me. “Also, saving the world isn’t on us anymore, Max,” Fang said. “Or you. We’re past that.”
I blinked up at him and felt the last three years of my life fall away in shreds.
He was right, of course. But if I wasn’t supposed to save the world…
Then who is Maximum Ride?
79
FANG WRAPPED HIS strong, sinewy arms around me. He stroked the spot between my wings as we swayed in the hammock in the cool night air. My whole body screamed to just drown in this moment with Fang, in his love—one hundred percent mine now, finally—but my conscience just wouldn’t shut up.
“I know I should be grateful,” I said after a few moments, my mind whirring. “But to be honest, I kind of resent Nino Pierpont—and even my mom—for protecting us, for saving only us. Like just because others don’t have wings or aren’t enhanced they’re not superior enough to live?”
“It’s so frustrating,” Fang said, sighing. “We’ve spent our whole lives either being totally exploited or trying to protect other people. And this time, there’s no way to save them, no one to kill.”
“We’re powerless.” I sighed. We’re all aware of my control issues.
“It kills me,” he agreed. “But I do know that we were brought here, that we were saved, so that you could help this island full of kids who need you. You’re one of the most stubborn people I’ve ever met, Maximum Ride. You’re also incredibly intelligent, and beautiful, and charming when you want to be, which is probably why you can manipulate people into doing what you want most of the time.”
“I’m not manip—” I protested.
“But those qualities also make you a brilliant leader,” Fang interrupted. “And an awesome fighter. That’s why you were chosen for this—to lead the new generation.”
“And meanwhile the rest of the world’s just screwed?” I said.
“Maybe.” His soft feathers brushed against my skin, enveloping us. “But if the world’s doomed either way, maybe we can have this one night of our lives to just be together and forget that anyone else exists. To just be happy.”
I was quiet for a moment. Just be happy. How I ached for that freedom.
“Max?”
“Hmm?”
Fang lifted my chin and looked down at me intently. He took a deep breath. “I’ve waited my whole life to be with you. Do you get that?”
My heart fluttered as I nodded. I did. I felt exactly the same way.
“So can’t we just enjoy this? Just for a little while?”
Fang’s eyes were liquid black in the darkness, that familiar lopsided little smile playing across his lips. His lips… My heart raced as he leaned in again, never taking his eyes from my face. Then those perfect lips met mine in the softest, most tender kiss, and I closed my eyes and breathed in the sweetness of him.
When I finally opened my eyes again, dazed with happiness, Fang looked shocked, almost pained, like he’d just realized something.
“What?” I asked, nervous.
“Nothing. I just…” His voice was hoarse. “This is everything. You’re all I need.”
Then Fang’s lips crashed into mine again, even more passionately, almost desperately. I kissed him back fiercely. I felt his fingers tangle in my hair, then his hands moving over my stomach, my hips, pulling me closer.