Andrew ignored her. Being a calm, rational man, he wanted to hear the arguments they’d come up with to convince him. As he stared into the azure blue of Kat Devereaux’s eyes, he understood now why sometimes people couldn’t look away from a train wreck. “Perhaps we should go back to a few weeks before your birthday and take it from there.”
“As I was saying, a few weeks before the big three-o I started evaluating my life, which I think is a fairly common thing, and realized it was close to perfect. I love my job-I teach art to elementary school children. I’m disgustingly healthy, I treat myself to good vacations, and I have a comfortable place to live. There was only one thing missing.”
She paused and Andrew smirked to himself. A man. She wanted a man.
“A baby. I’ve always wanted children, or at least a child. It’s the one thing missing in my life.” She paused and stared at him expectantly. “Any questions so far?”
Andrew ceased smirking. A baby? She wanted a baby. He didn’t think so. “Several. But why don’t you continue and we’ll see how many you leave open.”
“That just sort of sets the stage. About two weeks ago Bitsy told me your father refused to make you a partner unless you got married.”
Andrew glared at Bitsy, who remained unrepentant. “I was in the library when you and Father had your little discussion in the study.”
Andrew didn’t take her to task for eavesdropping since it would have been a total waste of time. However, he refused to let her matchmaking go unchecked. And was his whole damn family obsessed with his matrimonial state or lack thereof? “That’s it, Bitsy. This time you’ve gone too far. I don’t need you discussing my private affairs with strangers.”
“Kat’s no stranger to me. And you know her family. Rand Hamilton’s her father and Jackson Hamilton’s her brother.”
“Nor do I need you soliciting a wife on my behalf.” Irritation tinged his tone.
Kat watched the interplay between him and his sister with avid interest, seemingly unperturbed at being the object of discussion. He’d never have pegged her as Rand Hamilton’s daughter. Rand was as much of a cagey manipulator as his own father. Her friendship with Bitsy made sense.
“Well, for goodness’ sake, if I didn’t do something you’d end up marrying that horrid Claudia. There are plenty of horrid people in our family already without you adding to the numbers.”
He had, in fact, spent some time assessing Claudia as a marriage partner. “What, dear sister, is wrong with Claudia?”
“She called Juliana a brat!”
Andrew considered the antics of his precocious six-year-old niece. “Juliana is a brat.” An indulgent smile softened the blow. He’d never been able to stay angry with his sister.
“I know she is. You know she is…but, it was the way Claudia said it!”
Kat piped up. “You wouldn’t happen to have any ice cream, would you?”
Andrew eyed her flat stomach. “You’re not…you know…that way already, are you?”
Kat rolled her eyes upward. “No. If I were, I wouldn’t consider marrying you. I’m just hungry.”
Andrew marveled at her matter-of-fact tone regarding the issue. Not that it mattered, because he wasn’t buying into their plan. He waved a generous hand, “By all means, help yourself.”
The electronic chirping of a beeper cut off Andrew’s sentence. Bitsy read the digital display and grimaced. “Well, kids, I hate to cut out on the fun but this is Juliana’s baby-sitter and she’s given me the 811 code.”
“Don’t you mean 9-1-1?” Andrew corrected.
“Nope, 8-1-1 is our code for brat attack. Last week she tried to tie the postman to a stake. Said she was playing Salem witch trials.” Bitsy stopped en route to the door to envelop Kat in a hug. “Welcome to the family, darling.” She bussed Andrew on the cheek. “Congratulations, big brother. You’re making a wise decision.”
Without further ado, she sallied out the back door.
Andrew ignored her parting comment. Reasoning with Bitsy was in the same league as turning the tide. But it didn’t mean he’d go along with this flaky scheme she’d concocted, even though he did need a wife because he damn well meant to get that partnership, whatever the cost. And his father had already named the price.
Kat threw open the freezer and rummaged about until she surfaced bearing a pint of premium ice cream like a trophy. She grinned at him as she pulled off the top. “Spoon?”
He indicated the silverware drawer.
“I can’t believe you buy this stuff. I hadn’t figured you for a Chunky Monkey man.”
Just what the hell did she mean by that? “Bitsy likes it so I always keep the stuff on hand.”
She flashed that saucy grin again. “A woman with excellent taste, your sister.”
Andrew watched in horrified fascination as she spooned a bite directly from the carton. She paused, her spoon in midair. “What? Why’re you looking at me that way?”
At least she hadn’t used her finger. “I don’t believe I’ve ever seen anyone bypass the bowl and go straight for the carton.” And she and his sister thought he’d actually consider living with her?
“For goodness’ sake, relax. It’s only a pint. It’ll be gone in no time. Now a half gallon would’ve been another story. Unless you wanted some.” She offered the open carton. “Do you want some?”
She stood before him, a cross between a pixie and Medusa on a bad hair day and, out of nowhere, his libido kicked into overdrive. He reminded himself they were talking about ice cream. He reminded himself she’d concocted a nutty scheme to marry him and bear his child.
“No, thanks.” To all of it. The ice cream. Her. Her plan.
“You’re sure?” She still held the carton toward him.
“Positive.”
Kat shrugged and spooned up another mouthful. “So, do you just not like ice cream, or is it Chunky Monkey you object to?”
“I didn’t say I objected to it, I simply said I didn’t want any.”
She nibbled at a walnut. “Let me guess, your favorite flavor is…vanilla. With the little bean specks in it, of course.”
Had she trailed him to the grocery store? Slipped in behind him at an ice-cream kiosk? And what if he did like vanilla? She made it sound criminal.
“Vanilla’s a good basic.” This was ridiculous! Getting defensive over ice cream. “But enough about ice cream. Why me? Don’t you know any eligible men?”
She ran her tongue catlike over the spoon and Andrew felt a totally unwelcome and unexpected stab of want.
Kat looked at him as if she were dealing with a child who couldn’t grasp a simple concept. “Of course I do. I have quite a few male friends.”
“So, what’s wrong with them?”
“Nothing’s wrong with them. That’s the problem. I like them. Why would I want to ruin a perfectly good friendship by marrying someone I like? And they’d want to stick around or at least be involved with the baby afterward. On the other hand, you and I would make a perfect match.”
“You’ve lost me on that one.”
Once again she waved the carton in front of him.
“Chunky Monkey. Vanilla. Carlotta. Gertrude.” She said, and went back to eating, as if no further clarification were necessary.
Lost. He was definitely lost. “Gertrude? Who in the hell is Gertrude?”
She brandished her spoon toward the front of the house. “Your car. I named her Gertrude. She looks like a Gertrude.”
She’d named his car now! “Gertrude?”
“Sorry, it just seemed to fit. But you could call her Trudy.”
“I won’t be calling it anything. But please explain.”
She spoke slowly as if he might have trouble following her. “You’re vanilla. I’m Chunky Monkey. You’re Gertrude. I’m Carlotta. You’re not my type. I’m not your type. We have nothing to worry about if we get married.”
He had to agree with her on that one. They had nothing to worry about because they wouldn’t be getting married.