I walk up the two flights of stairs to my room. Room 201. A one room, two-bed dorm that I'll share with another girl. A girl that I'll meet shortly I'm sure. I find my room easily. I requested one on the end so that it was a little bigger. Sliding the key in the lock, I listen as it disengages and then push the door open. It's exactly what I expected, only smaller.
I close the door behind me and as I'm standing in the middle of the room, I give myself a much-needed pep talk. I think I'm ready for this. It's all I've been thinking about for the last two years. Getting out of Pacific Grove and starting my own life. One that revolves around something other than people with money. I love my family, I enjoy the fact that I've never had to want for anything in my entire life, but I also hate being known as the plastic surgeon's daughter. Or, the rich girl. Everyone I went to high school with was from a wealthy family. Why was I the rich girl?
If I had to guess, it would be because there was nothing else about me that was interesting. There was no other way to describe me. Nothing else that defined me as a person.
Baggy jeans and a t-shirt were my standard wardrobe. Tennis shoes or flip flops depending on the weather. No makeup. Who was I trying to impress? No one. I didn't play sports and I wasn't part of any clubs. I didn't have time. Aside from Elliot, I didn't talk to anyone. I kept to myself. I kept my head down, worked hard, got good grades and focused on getting the hell out of there. That was my goal. Get into Yale, move across the country and find a way to start over, to reinvent myself.
The first part is going according to plan. Here I am. A freshman at the prestigious Yale University. On the other side of the country from the only place I've ever known as home. I didn't think I would miss it as much as I do right now, but I'm attributing that to nerves. That's the only thing I can think that it is. Unless it's the fact that I'm about to meet my dorm-mate.
My parents threw a fit when I told them I wanted to live in the dorms and have the full college experience. They were ready to shell out a boat-load of money to buy me my own condo or flat. I thought about it for a second but knew that I would become a recluse if I allowed them to do that for me. I can't let that happen. I need to broaden my horizons, according to Elliot, and meet new people. I think that's why he chose Cambridge instead of Yale. He knew that if we were here together that I wouldn't try to make friends. He's been my only real friend since we were kids. I've always had him, so I've never needed to have other friends.
Elliot and I grew up next door to each other. When I say that we were neighbors, I mean that in the sense that we had a football field of yard that separated our houses. We use to call it our own private playground. It was partially wooded so we had plenty to explore growing up. His little brother James use to follow us around and spy on us with his friends. I always thought it was cute, Elliot didn't.
Elliot’s the middle child. Luke was a year ahead of us in school and James has one year left then he'll join Elliot at Cambridge. I'm an only child. Just me. Always flying solo, no annoying siblings following me around or telling me what to do. I always hoped that my mother would change her mind about having another kid, but it didn't happen.
Thinking about Elliot and Luke makes me smile. I remember the good times that Luke and I had before he left. I think about the times Elliot almost caught us. My favorite memory has to be the night I snuck out his bedroom window. I came over earlier that night, while Elliot was out with Kylie. The plan was for me to leave before Elliot came home and we lost track of the time. We had no idea he was even home until he knocked on Luke’s bedroom door.
I almost screamed and blew our cover. Luke covered my mouth before any sounds came out. If Elliot hadn’t broken up with Kylie that night things would have gone according to plan. Instead, Luke ended up playing video games with Elliot that night and I ended up climbing out his window and spending the night alone in my room.
I hear the door handle jiggle, metal slides against metal and the door opens with a pop. I stand, leaving a dent in the mattress of the bed I had been sitting on. My bed, I think. Her things are already on the other side of the room. There's your typical Einstein poster on the wall above the headboard. Boxes are stacked in front of her dresser. We said that we would meet at 5 o'clock today to head to freshman orientation together. Glancing down at my watch, I see that she's five minutes early.
We are going to get along great.
A short, brown-haired girl with a huge smile on her face comes rushing towards me before I have the chance to move. She wraps her arms around me in a hug and squeezes as hard as she can.
"Reagan!" She squeals.
"Hi." I'm trying to be polite, Elliot said that I needed to be polite and friendly when I meet Felicity, but I hear the uncertainty in my voice. I'm uncomfortable.
She lets me go and studies me for a brief second. I'm in my standard uniform of jeans and a t-shirt. I have sandals on today because I knew it would be stifling on the plane. I push my glasses back on my nose and smile a tentative smile at her.
"Wow. You look really nervous right now." She pauses and I can't help but smile at her blatant honesty. "Are you ready to check this place out? Orientation starts in a half hour so we have time to roam around before we head to the student center if you want. I've been hanging out in the library most of the day so I can at least show you where that is."
"Sure." I've seen the library. I've been to the student center. I won't have a problem finding my way around campus. My parents and I took a tour when I came to visit last fall after I was accepted for early admission. I don't want to spoil it for her though so I let her lead the way.
Felicity talks my ear off until we reach the student center and orientation is under way. She's a bright girl. She's here on a full ride scholarship. Even I wasn't able to do that and my grades were top of my class. I'm glad she's here, though, and I can't wait to tell Elliot about her. I've been instructed to call him tonight and tell him all about my first day on campus.
I think he worries about me too much. I can handle this. I can make new friends. I can become the person I've always wanted to be but have been too scared of becoming. No one knows me here yet. I can be whoever I want to be. I can reinvent myself to the ends of the Earth and back if I want to. The only person who would even notice a change is Elliot and as much as his opinion matters to me, I need this. He knows that. I need this time away from home for me. To become who I want to be.
Felicity and I walk around campus after orientation and talk for hours. We both need to unpack, but it's the last thing on our minds. I spot a coffee shop and practically drag her inside. I place my order and let her step up to the counter. She doesn't order anything and I can't help but ask her why.
"Not a big coffee drinker? I thought I saw a coffee maker in the room."
"No, I love coffee. It's just..."
Her voice trails off and she doesn't finish her sentence. I don't push her because I can see that whatever I said has hit a nerve. I grab my coffee when they call my name and we walk back to our room in silence. Felicity immediately starts unpacking her things, stuffing her drawers full of clothing with her back to me. I open the first box I see and pull out the framed pictures that I had sent. What I didn't think to bring was a hammer and nails so that I could put them up on the wall.