“Hi,” Willard said.
“Hello, Willard.” Her voice was cool, countryish, polite, and he knew in a surge of panic that she hated him.
He looked at the child peeking from behind her legs. He was beautiful — blond and dirty-faced, in patched and faded jeans that buttoned between the legs. Tears filled Wil-lard’s eyes, blurring his vision so badly he could only make out the outlines of their figures.
He said, “I’m glad to see you, Callie.”
She could hear the catch in his voice; she knew well enough how it was for him, seeing his own son. She said nothing, merely looking at him. Then, amazingly, she smiled. “It’s nice to see you, too, Willard.”
“Candy!” the child said, rather sternly, fists doubled.
Callie laughed, threw Willard a helpless look. Then she bent down to the child again. “Come on, Jimmy,” she said, “Mommy’s in a hurry.”
Then old man Llewellyn was there, shouting at them, red-faced and white-haired as a Millerite prophet. “Beautiful morning! Step right up, there! What’ll it be this beautiful morning? Satisfaction guaranteed!”
Callie and the child disappeared behind the middle grocery shelf.
“Pack of Old Golds,” he said. “Regular.” His knees were shaky.
When he went out on the porch he saw Henry Soames sitting in his car, the flesh sagging from around his eyes, his skin unhealthy gray. He was huge and old as the mountains, and as patient. Their eyes met, but Henry Soames showed no sign of recognition, merely looked puzzled, reminded of something.
We were friends, Willard thought. We used to talk half the night sometimes. I worked on my goddam jitney in your garage.
He thought of the red-headed policeman, smiling, pretending to listen to nothing he said, and a chill went down his back. He thought of waving, as if noticing Henry only now. But it was too late. He went down the steps and walked across the road, opening the cigarettes as he walked. He could feel the old man’s puzzled eyes on him, watching.
Shit passing in the night, he thought. He lit a cigarette, and it tasted worse than most.
Then, behind him, Henry called, “Willard?”
He froze, scared sick, his knees shaky. As soon as he was able, he dropped the cigarette and turned around. Henry was half out of the car, grinning, calling “Willard, you devil!” Callie and James were on Llewellyn’s porch, watching like small, gentle statues from a church.
With more self-control than he’d have thought he could muster, Willard raised his arm and waved and then, without thinking, smiled at them. And then — who knows why? — he turned his back and began to run, ashamed of doing it even as he did it but also full of crazy joy. They’d forgiven him. Of course! Why shouldn’t they? Wouldn’t even he — even Norma, in fact — have done the same? He kept running, bringing his feet down hard on the road’s packed-tight snow. When he was over the hill and around the bend, protected from Henry Soames’ eyes by trees, he slowed down to a walk and thought, still smiling, “How absurd, all these years! A foolish nightmare, a sad, shoddy dream out of Plato’s cave!” The day was bright, surprisingly warm, and the three-mile walk ahead of him seemed nothing. He crossed the bridge, hardly noticing, hurrying. “I was insane,” he thought, startled. “It’s as simple as that! I must remember, from now on. Whatever happens, I must remember.” It came to him that he’d promised his mother he’d pick up something if he stopped at Llewellyn’s. Was it baking soda?
And now, behind him, he heard Henry Soames’ car coming noisily after him. They’d insist on giving him a ride, of course. There was no escape, nowhere to hide — if he ran for the woods they’d see him and think he was crazy. Willard laughed, blushing till his cheeks were like a girl’s, then turned and flung up his arms in submission. The Ford came beside him, clanking and growling like the hound of heaven.
“Willard, you old son-of-a-gun,” said Henry Soames.
VIII. THE GRAVE
1
All morning there had been a gray truck parked in the cemetery on the mountainside across and a little down from where they hunted, and fifteen feet this side of the truck two men were digging a grave. Henry Soames wondered about it from time to time, when he sat resting for a minute on a rock or when he stood helping his boy with the rifle. They were burying someone he knew, most likely — only people from close around used the cemetery — but he couldn’t think who it would be. Henry was always one of the first to hear about births and deaths, partly because of his running the diner (as he still sometimes called it, though the big sign in front of the new building said RESTAURANT, and it was no longer the Stop-Off but The Maples, which was more elegant, Callie said), but mainly because Henry Soames was the kind of man he was, interested as a spinster aunt in the life of the whole county and a partisan. Maybe it was Charley Benson’s mother, it came to him after a while, and, not realizing he was doing it, he took off his cap and held it over his stomach a minute, thinking and looking at the ground. She was ninety-seven, and likely to go at any time. But it was odd that he hadn’t heard. Maybe on the way back home he and Jimmy would cross over to where they were digging and find out for sure.
They were regular, hired grave-diggers, not relatives or friends of the family: They had a shade-canvas up, and they worked slowly and steadily. Over their heads the sky was bright blue, like the middle of summer, with a long, pale mare’s-tail off to the west, and the maples, exploding to red now, were as motionless as trees in a dream. The shade under the trees looked cool and comfortable (here in the open it was hot as a day in the middle of August) and he thought of the creek over there, out of sight from where he stood, and the thought made him thirsty. The tombstones would be smooth and comfortable, some of them, for sitting on.
Jimmy seemed not to have noticed the truck, or at any rate he hadn’t grown curious yet. A boy’s curiosity took time to move out from wherever he happened to be standing, if where he was was unfamiliar. He wanted to know why the old barbwire fence was here, where as far as a four-year-old boy could see there had never been anything but stiff gray weeds and berry bushes and big rounded rocks. (There’d been a house here, years ago, a place where three old-maid sisters had lived, named Riddle. You could still find the chimney, down under the woodbine and burdocks, if you looked, and you could see where the road had been, and three of the stone supports of the smokehouse. There was one old pear tree, dead and white and brittle as bone, standing all by itself in the brambles like a stubborn old Baptist waiting for the Judgment.) The boy wanted to turn over every old stick or flat stone they found to squat down with his arms on his knees and study the crawling things underneath. Henry would stand patiently or would sit, if there was a stump handy, giving his son his way. It was good for a boy to look things over. And then, too, Henry could use the rests. As it was he was farther from home than Doc Cathey approved of his going. He could look behind him and see his house and restaurant a half-mile down, way to the right of the cemetery, over by the highway: the house a little white box in the shade of maples and three pine trees scraggly with age, no grass around it to speak of, cinders instead for the trucks to park on — in front of the house and off to the left the red walls and the black roof of the restaurant. There was only one car there now, a Volkswagen; no one he knew. He looked over at the grave-diggers again and shook his head.