Grabbing me by the elbow, not giving me any chance to say another word, Ysandra dragged me back into the living room where Luna—or rather, Dorthea—was waiting. She cocked her head, a wicked smile on her face.
“And so, she is back. The Winter Maiden. What say you now: Will you accept our help, or do we ride free of our promise, using my great-great-granddaughter as our mare?”
She’d do it, too. I could tell. She’d take over Luna and rage through the world doing whatever it was that she’d left unfinished. I had no doubt that Dorthea was an intensely powerful witch, and I had no idea what kind of magic she could work. Especially with a host of the dead on her side.
“We accept your help. But I beg you to reconsider—don’t take Luna’s life in payment. Surely we can think of something else you might want even more.”
“Enough. The body must rest. I will vacate till the need is here, and then I will come and bring my legions with me, and we will decimate your enemy.” And with that Dorthea vanished, and Luna crumbled to the ground as the Circle broke. We could tangibly feel it snap, and the chalk outline on the floor swept open.
“Luna! Luna? Are you all right?” I was by her side, on my knees, before anyone else could move. She stirred, sitting up slowly, holding her head. “Luna, can you hear me?”
“Yes.” Luna pinched her nose between her eyes, grimacing. “I feel sick, and I have a horrible headache.” Then she focused on my face, and her look turned to icy. “Cicely. How did it go in town? I hope everyone’s all right.”
I slowly backed off. I knew she meant what she said, but the tone of voice left no question as to her mood. I bit my lip, wanting to beg her to forgive me, but one glance at Ysandra, and I knew I couldn’t do that.
“We came through with minimal losses. We took back city hall, and some of Lannan’s men are there with the police and some of the Fae.” I reached out to help her up, but she ignored my hand, instead struggling to stand on her own. Grieve gently took my arm, drawing me back as Peyton entered the Circle to help her. Luna let Peyton guide her over to the sofa, which had been pushed out of the way.
“I’m glad everyone’s all right.” She was staring at Kaylin as she spoke, but again, her look was cold as ice—cold as my realm—and I realized Luna had erected a wall between us. She was on our side, but she’d never be my friend again. Or Kaylin’s. Not unless something happened to shift the balance. “I’m afraid I feel queasy. Ysandra can give you all the details. Peyton, would you take me to my room? I need to rest.”
Peyton gave me a sad, understanding smile, then helped Luna out of the room. As soon as she left, I whirled on Ysandra.
“Tell me, what now? What do I do?”
“I told you. I doubt she’ll ever trust you again. Not unless mountains fall and the earth quakes and fire rains from the sky. Or some such miracle. Luna will hold your back, though. Don’t ever doubt her loyalty again. She will fall in service to you, even if she curses you doing so.” With a long sigh, Ysandra motioned for us to sit down. “Let me make some tea. It’s been a long and grueling evening for everyone.”
“We cannot keep our men so long from the Barrow.” I looked up at Grieve. “What do you think?”
“I will talk to Olrick. He leads the brigade. Stay here.”
As he and Chatter went outside, Rhia and Kaylin joined me on the sofa, and I leaned back, suddenly realizing that I smelled. Looking down at my clothes, I saw the spatters of blood covering me, and I shook my head.
“I honestly don’t know what to do next. We can’t keep waiting for Myst to make the next move. We can’t keep running from fire to fire, cleaning up after her raids. We have to find out where she is and then go on the offense. It’s really our only hope.” I wearily accepted a plate of cookies from Peyton as she returned to the room. She sat down opposite me, leaning forward to prop her elbows on knees, hands crossed between her legs.
“That means planning out how to kill her. Finding her won’t be the hardest part.” Peyton’s gaze flickered over to Kaylin. “Let’s get this out of the way, shall we? What you did? I hate you for it, but I understand why you did it, and unlike Luna, I can let it go. So you know my secrets now. But I trust you to keep them to yourself unless you feel they breach some security around Cicely and Rhiannon.”
Kaylin sauntered over. “I would never have done what I did had there been another way. But we have so little time, and so many enemies facing us. Cicely needed me to help, and so we chose the only path we had at the moment. If we’d told you about it beforehand and you had been a spy, you could have warned Myst we were onto her. As it is, by now she probably knows, but we needed every second we could buy.”
Peyton shrugged. “I realize that. I may be angry now, but I’m not shortsighted. I know what needs to be done. Luna though . . . you . . .”
“I realize that—the minute I broke through her shields and saw what was there, I knew how this was going to end. It did one thing for me, though.” He shook his head, sounding resigned. “I’ve accepted there will never be an ‘us’—not with her and me. As much as I hoped there would be, it can’t happen. And that frees me to do what I must, once this is over.”
Terribly curious, but realizing that asking would probably make me not only a bitch but a nosy one at that, I waited for a beat. “But Luna poses no danger to the Courts, right?”
“Right.” Pausing for a moment, Kaylin considered a thought, then he motioned to Peyton. “Can you leave us alone for a moment? I know Check and Fearless won’t go anywhere, but the rest of you please step outside the room.”
They did, after some grumbling. When they were gone, Kaylin turned to me. “I would normally never tell you what I’m about to, but I think you need to understand something I discovered, in order to fully determine what to do about Luna. I’ve lived a lot longer than you, so far, and don’t throw anything in my face about how you’re the Fae Queen now, yada, yada, yada. The fact is, I’ve seen a lot of life, and too much of people, generally.”
I waited, not sure if I really wanted to hear what he had to say. But he leaned forward and took my hands, and I realized that he really wouldn’t tell me anything if he didn’t think it was absolutely necessary. Kaylin didn’t gossip. He didn’t run around spilling secrets.
“When I went through her mind, I came across a memory that Luna had secreted away. Oh, she remembers it, all right, but she keeps it under lock and key, repressed to the point that she rarely ever thinks about it. In fact, she’s built up so many layers trying to hide from the memory that she truly, actually believed she’d managed to rid herself of it. Until I dredged through . . . until I raked her mind over the coals and uncovered it.”
Fuck. “Do I really need to know this? Isn’t it just going to make it worse for her?”
“No, because you will never tell her what you know. You will go on acting just the way you did tonight, but perhaps it will stay your tongue if you feel the need to bitch at her or question her stance.” He let out another sigh. “When Luna was a teenager, her uncle came to visit. He was a telepath . . . a slimy bastard. He’s dead now, or I’d hunt him down and kill him myself once this war with Myst is over. But, long story short, he sneaked into her room one night, and he raped her.”
When I started to gasp, Kaylin held up his hand. “That’s not the worst of it—if you can believe it. He not only had his way with her, but he got inside of her mind. He not only convinced Luna she asked for it, but he filled her mind with self-loathing. He taunted her weight, her looks, her voice—and he convinced her that she’d given him the go-ahead to do what he did.”
“Oh fucking hell. And we drugged her, and then you . . . at my command . . .”