I was exhausted, she imagined herself telling them. My blood sugar was low, and I wasn’t thinking straight. I promise I’ll get counseling…
Her hands were shaking as she turned the key in the ignition, her nerves buzzing with adrenaline. She just wanted to get out of there, to go home and pretend she’d never heard of Quinn or Jenna or the All-Night Party. Maybe the whole incident would just disappear like a bad dream.
Oh, fuck, she thought, as the police car appeared in her rearview mirror. It pulled up right behind her, blocking her getaway. This isn’t happening.
The cop who got out was Brian Yanuzzi — who else could it be? — but that didn’t make her feel any better. He circled the hood of his cruiser and swaggered up to her door, all-business, just like the last time. She brought down her window.
“Something wrong?” she asked, trying to play it cool.
“What?” He seemed puzzled by the question, or maybe just her tone. “No, I just… I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed talking to you last night.”
Liz was so relieved she almost laughed.
“Me, too,” she said, after a brief hesitation. “It was really nice.”
He bent down, tilting his head so he could see her better.
“So how’s that girl? The one with the cramps?”
“She’s okay. She just needed some rest.”
“That’s good.” He crouched lower, his hands resting on his thighs. “So, uh… you going home?”
She was about to say yes when she realized that home was the last place she wanted to be. She hated the mornings after Chris stayed over, the young lovers sleeping in, then lazing around in their pajamas, trading secret smiles while Liz swept the floor and emptied the dishwasher and folded the laundry.
“Not necessarily,” she said.
“I was thinking about maybe getting some breakfast.” He straightened up, rolling his neck in a slow semicircle, first one way, then the other. “You hungry?”
Later, in the diner, they had a laugh about how long it took her to respond to his invitation. She just kept staring at him, and he started to worry that maybe he’d made a mistake, that she was trying to come up with an excuse, a gentle way to let him down. She had to explain that it was just a brain freeze, the kind of thing that happens when you’ve been up all night. You’re in the middle of a conversation, and you check out for a few seconds, like somebody flipped a switch. For a little while, it’s like the world just stops, and there’s nothing you can do but sit tight and wait for it to start moving again.
Acknowledgments 
I’d like to thank Maria Massie, Elizabeth Beier, Dori Weintraub, and Sylvie Rabineau for their enthusiasm and support, not just for this book, but over the many years in which it was written. Navjeet Bal, Nina Perrotta, and Luke Perrotta told me anecdotes that later blossomed into stories. And I’m grateful to Mary Granfield for too much to enumerate here.
About the Author
Tom Perrotta is the author of eight books. His first was a book of linked stories, Bad Haircut, his most recent is the New York Times bestselling novel The Leftovers, which is being developed into a series for HBO. Two of Perrotta’s novels — Election and Little Children — have been made into acclaimed and award-winning movies, and he was nominated for an Academy Award for the Little Children screenplay. Perrotta grew up in New Jersey and now lives outside of Boston, Massachusetts. Visit his website at www.tomperrotta.net.
About the Publisher
House of Anansi Press was founded in 1967 with a mandate to publish Canadian-authored books, a mandate that continues to this day even as the list has branched out to include internationally acclaimed thinkers and writers. The press immediately gained attention for significant titles by notable writers such as Margaret Atwood, Michael Ondaatje, George Grant, and Northrop Frye. Since then, Anansi’s commitment to finding, publishing and promoting challenging, excellent writing has won it tremendous acclaim and solid staying power. Today Anansi is Canada’s pre-eminent independent press, and home to nationally and internationally bestselling and acclaimed authors such as Gil Adamson, Margaret Atwood, Ken Babstock, Peter Behrens, Rawi Hage, Misha Glenny, Jim Harrison, A. L. Kennedy, Pasha Malla, Lisa Moore, A. F. Moritz, Eric Siblin, Karen Solie, and Ronald Wright. Anansi is also proud to publish the award-winning nonfiction series The CBC Massey Lectures. In 2007, 2009, 2010, and 2011 Anansi was honoured by the Canadian Booksellers Association as “Publisher of the Year.”
Also by Tom Perrotta
The Leftovers
The Abstinence Teacher
Little Children
Joe College
Election
The Wishbones
Bad Haircut: Stories of the Seventies
Copyright
Copyright © 2013 Tom Perrotta
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.
Distribution of this electronic edition via the Internet or any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal. Please do not participate in electronic piracy of copyrighted material; purchase only authorized electronic editions. We appreciate your support of the author’s rights.
First published in the United States of America by St. Martin’s Press.
This edition published in 2013 by House of Anansi Press Inc.
110 Spadina Avenue, Suite 801
Toronto, ON, M5V 2K4
Tel. 416-363-4343
Fax 416-363-1017
These short stories are works of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in these stories are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
Some of the stories in this book appeared in the following publications:
“The Smile on Happy Chang’s Face” and “Nine Inches” in Post Road; “The Chosen Girl” in Gettysburg Review; “Kiddie Pool” in Best Life; “Grade My Teacher” in Five Points.
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Perrotta, Tom, 1961–, author
Nine inches / Tom Perrotta.
Short stories.
Issued in print and electronic formats.
ISBN 978-1-77089-427-3 (pbk.). — ISBN 978-1-77089-428-0 (html)
I. Title.
PS3566.E6956N55 2013 813’.54 C2013-903639-3
C2013-903640-7