"Not good," he said.
"That's too bad," she said, and suddenly looked up at him. "Dad?"
"Yeah?"
"The other day, when Mark was feeling so awful,
you know?"
"Yeah?"
"And I thought he might die?" "He wasn't going to die, honey." "I know, but that's what I thought." "Well, don't worry, he's okay now."
"Yeah, but that's not what I'm trying to say, Dad."
She seemed suddenly distraught, her brow furrowed, her eyes troubled. He sat beside her on the bench, put his arm around her, and said, "What is it, darling?"
"When I thought he was going to die?"
"Yes?"
"I wished I would inherit his guitar."
And suddenly she was crying.
"I didn't want him to die," she said.
"I know you didn't."
Tears streaming down her face. "But I wanted his guitar." "That's all right, honey." Sobbing bitterly.
"Am I a terrible person?"
"No, darling, you're a wonderful person." "I love him to death, Dad." "We all do."
"He's my very best brother."
"In fact, he's your only brother," Carella said. April burst out laughing, almost choking on her own tears. He held her close, and said into her hair, "Why don't you go say hello to him?"
"I will," she said, "thanks, Dad," and rushed out of his arms and out of the room, yelling, "Mark! Wake up! I'm home I"
The old house was still again.
He went into the living room, and turned on the imitation Tiffany lamp, and sat in the comfortable easy chair under it, thinking about Mark's guitar and Svetlana's cat and the dead hooker with the plastic bag over her head.
When Teddy came home some five minutes later, he watched her as she eased the door shut with her hip, and then put two shopping bags brimming with groceries on the chair near the mirror. Watched her silently in her silent world as she took off her coat and hung it in the closet, thinking that here in this violent city where he plied his daily trade... Here in a universe that seemed to grow darker and darker each day until every day threatened to become eternal night ... Here there was Teddy to come home to.
He almost called her name out loud.
But she hadn't yet seen him, would not have heard him in any event. He kept watching her. She turned toward the living room, seeing him at last, surprised, .... her eyes widening, a smile blossoming on her face.
He rose and went to her.