“I’m sorry, love. But Geoff’s really tired tonight, he’s been working so hard. And now he says he wants to watch his movie in peace?”
She said it like that, like it was a question, and it took me a moment to realise she was asking me to stop playing my music.
“But I’m working on something important here,” I said.
“I know. But he’s really tired tonight, and he says he can’t relax because of your guitar.”
“What Geoff needs to realise,” I said, “is that just as he’s got his work to do, I’ve got mine.”
My sister seemed to think about this. Then she did a big sigh. “I don’t think I ought to report that back to Geoff.”
“Why not? Why don’t you? It’s time he got the message.”
“Why not? Because I don’t think he’d be very pleased, that’s why not. And I don’t really think he’d accept that his work and your work are quite on the same level.”
I stared at Maggie, for a moment quite speechless. Then I said: “You’re talking such rubbish. Why are you talking such rubbish?”
She shook her head wearily, but didn’t say anything.
“I don’t understand why you’re talking such rubbish,” I said. “And just when things are going so well for me.”
“Things are going well for you, are they, love?” She kept looking at me in the half-light. “Well, all right,” she said in the end. “I won’t argue with you.” She turned away to open the door. “Come down and join us, if you like,” she said as she left.
Rigid with rage, I stared at the door that had closed behind her. I became aware of muffled sounds from the television downstairs, and even in the state I was in, some detached part of my brain was telling me my fury should be directed not at Maggie, but at Geoff, who’d been systematically trying to undermine me ever since I’d got here. Even so, it was my sister I was livid at. In all the time I’d been in her house, she hadn’t once asked to hear a song, the way Tilo and Sonja had done. Surely it wasn’t too much to ask of your own sister, and one who’d been, I happened to remember, a big music fan in her teens? And now here she was, interrupting me when I was trying to work and talking all this rubbish. Every time I thought of the way she’d said: “All right, I won’t argue with you,” I felt fresh fury coursing through me.
I came down off the window sill, put away the guitar, and threw myself down on my mattress. Then for the next little while I stared at the patterns on the ceiling. It seemed clear I’d been invited here on false pretences, that this had all been about getting cheap help for the busy season, a mug they didn’t even have to pay. And my sister didn’t understand what I was trying to achieve any better than did her moron of a husband. It would serve them both right if I left them here in the lurch and went back to London. I kept going round and round with this stuff, until maybe an hour or so later, I calmed down a bit and decided I’d just turn in for the night.
I DIDN’T SPEAK MUCH to either of them when I came down as usual just after the breakfast rush. I made some toast and coffee, helped myself to some left-over scrambled eggs, and settled down in the corner of the cafe. All through my breakfast the thought kept occurring to me I might run into Tilo and Sonja again up in the hills. And though this might mean having to face the music about Hag Fraser’s place, even so, I realised I was hoping it would happen. Besides, even if Hag Fraser’s was truly awful, they’d never suppose I’d recommended it out of malice. There’d be any number of ways for me to get out of it.
Maggie and Geoff were probably expecting me to help again with the lunch rush, but I decided they needed a lesson about taking people for granted. So after breakfast, I went upstairs, got my guitar and slipped out the back way.
It was really hot again and the sweat was running down my cheek as I climbed the path leading up to my bench. Even though I’d been thinking about Tilo and Sonja at breakfast, I’d forgotten them by this point, and so got a surprise when, coming up the final slope, I looked towards the bench and saw Sonja sitting there by herself. She spotted me immediately and waved.
I was still a bit wary of her, and especially without Tilo around, I wasn’t so keen to sit down with her. But she gave me a big smile and did a shifting movement, like she was making room for me, so I didn’t have much choice.
We said our hellos, then for a time we just sat there side by side, not speaking. This didn’t seem so odd at first, partly because I was still getting my breath back, and partly because of the view. There was more haze and cloud than the previous day, but if you concentrated, you could still see beyond the Welsh borders to the Black Mountains. The breeze was quite strong, but not uncomfortable.
“So where’s Tilo?” I asked in the end.
“Tilo? Oh…” She put her hand up to shield her eyes. Then she pointed. “There. You see? Over there. That is Tilo.”
Some way in the distance, I could see a figure, in what might have been a green T-shirt and a white sun cap, moving along the rising path towards Worcestershire Beacon.
“Tilo wished to go for a walk,” she said.
“You didn’t want to go with him?”
“No. I decided to stay here.”
While she wasn’t by any means the irate customer from the cafe, neither was she quite the same person who’d been so warm and encouraging to me the day before. There was definitely something up, and I started preparing my defence about Hag Fraser’s.
“By the way,” I said, “I’ve been working a bit more on that song. You can hear it if you like.”
She gave this consideration, then said: “If you do not mind, perhaps not just at this minute. You see, Tilo and I have just had a talk. You might call it a disagreement.”
“Oh okay. Sorry to hear that.”
“And now he has gone off for his walk.”
Again, we sat there not talking. Then I sighed and said: “I think maybe this is all my fault.”
She turned to look at me. “Your fault? Why do you say that?”
“The reason you’ve quarrelled, the reason your holiday’s all messed up now. It’s my fault. It’s that hotel, isn’t it? It wasn’t very good, right?”
“The hotel?” She seemed puzzled. “That hotel. Well, it has some weak points. But it is a hotel, like many others.”
“But you noticed, right? You noticed all the weak points. You must have done.”
She seemed to think this over, then nodded. “It is true, I noticed the weak points. Tilo, however, did not. Tilo, of course, thought the hotel was splendid. We are so lucky, he kept saying. So lucky to find such a hotel. Then this morning we have our breakfast. For Tilo, this is a fine breakfast, the best breakfast ever. I say, Tilo, don’t be stupid. This is not a good breakfast. This is not a good hotel. He says, no, no, we are so very lucky. So I become angry. I tell the proprietress everything that is wrong. Tilo leads me away. Let’s go for a walk, he says. You will feel better then. So we come out here. And he says, Sonja, look at these hills, aren’t they so beautiful? Aren’t we fortunate to come to such a place as this for our vacation? These hills, he says, are even more wonderful than he imagined them when we listen to Elgar. He asks me, isn’t this so? Perhaps I become angry again. I tell him, these hills are not so wonderful. It is not how I imagine them when I hear Elgar’s music. Elgar’s hills are majestic and mysterious. Here, this is just like a park. This is what I say to him, and then it is his turn to be cross. He says in that case, he will walk by himself. He says we are finished, we never agree on anything now. Yes, he says, Sonja, you and me, we are finished. And off he goes! So there you are. That is why he is up there and I am down here.” She shielded her eyes again and watched Tilo’s progress.
“I’m really sorry,” I said. “If only I hadn’t sent you to that hotel in the first place…”