"When all's said and done Mary never did the cooking Liz."
"Oh I realize if anything happens to one of your poor faithful women like happiness or marriage or both, if that should conceivably be possible, then you can go and eat in your club where you'll get better food than ever we can provide you with, but who's to send your suits to the cleaners?"
"They have a weekly service."
She laughed. "No John you're not to be loutish" she cried. "You know exactly what I'm driving at."
"Who's to put out my slippers in front of the fire you mean?"
"Well yes if you like."
"My dear no one's ever done that for me in my life and it's too late now."
"Which just shows you simply won't have comfort even at the smallest price" she said. "You are all the same. You'd rather be miserable alone in a hovel of a room than put up with having a woman about to make it home."
"How little you know" he replied and gave what was obviously a mock sigh.
"But you'll find yourself terribly lonely, you know you will."
"Be nothing new in that" he said with a sort of bravado.
"You'd rather stay by your own on a desert island than give in to Jane wouldn't you? Now tell me."
"I suppose they must have been held up in the fog" he replied looking for Richard Abbot and Mrs Weatherby.
"Heaven pity me" she sighed. "Oh but you can be maddening sometimes!"
He leaned forward, put a hand over hers.
"I'm so sorry darling, you see it's not my life, I haven't the right but Jane and I went slap through things when I last saw her and of course she's simply delighted with Mary. Strictly between you and me she's been worried about Philip and as a matter of fact I didn't much care for the boy myself at one period if you remember. Marriage'll be just the thing for him."
There was something in his speech which did not carry conviction, nevertheless Miss Jennings said "Go on, do. This is a distinct improvement."
He laughed. "Don't all you women get excited over weddings!"
"Well of course. What else d'you expect? Now go on."
"There's not a syllable more to tell just this minute. The second I have anything like a date or the name of the church, even where they propose to live, I'll pass it on at once. But you know how jealous Jane can be, how particularly cagey where her own or her children's affairs are concerned. Why some days I myself hardly dare ask how little Penelope happens to feelo No, the less said at the moment the better."
"Then what about Maud Winder?"
"Oh this will cook her goose with Jane right enough. You just wait till she hears."
"But you promise if things won't run smoothly you shan't let Jane ride roughshod over all your plans."
"My darling Liz I've known her for literally ages. I might even understand Jane better than you."
"Don't keep on, John, throwing that beastly old affair of yours with the woman plumb in my face. I really rather wish you wouldn't!"
"Okay I won't."
"Because heaven knows I'm no prude but there are parts of that story which aren't even, darling, for my tender ears."
He laughed. "I'm so sorry" he said.
"Well you'd better be" she answered and looked as though she sulked. There was a pause while he drummed on the table with his fingers.
"And have you got a list out, of the presents sweet Mary will want?" she asked.
"Not yet as a matter of fact."
"Blankets, bathtowels and so forth? It makes such a difference because otherwise in spite of two wars she may get nothing but glass."
"I'll remember" he promised.
A FEW days later Mrs Weatherby had John Pomfret to dinner alone for the third time after Philip had announced the engagement.
"Well Jane" he asked "have they said anything to you? Because I'm still without news at all."
"My poor heart goes out to them" she murmured.
"They seem to be taking their time certainly. But as you said the other day perhaps that's no bad thing in itself."
"It's not the two of them I worry over my dear so much as yourself." Her manner was unusually restrained, serious even.
He laughed uneasily. "How's this?" he cried.
"What on earth's to become of you when your girl goes?"
"But Jane, Mary's not my cook."
"No John you're not to make a joke about it" she said although there was little mirthful in his attitude. "You owe your own self the sacred duty of seeing to yourself" she argued with a sweet sincerity. "I know children must marry someday bless them but we do have the right to ask what is to become of our own lives."
"Yet not the right to ask that question of them Jane."
"My dear you are so much cleverer that you must bear with me. I never suggested anything of the kind I'm sure, now did I? I simply want to be told what you propose to do with yourself that's all."
"Carry on as usual I suppose."
"Changing maids every eight weeks John?"
"Oh don't!" he cried. "No I had the idea I might drift along to the Club perhaps for a bit."
"And what sort of life is that for a man?" she demanded. "Besides you know you can't afford standing drinks to all and sundry every hour of the day and night."
"They have their licensing laws too you know."
"Stuff and nonsense! Don't tell me those men pay the smallest attention to stupid little regulations. No it would be so bad for you John."
"Then how d'you propose I should live?"
"I've simply no idea darling which, is why I'm so terribly worried."
"Well I'm most flattered. Everyone seems to want to be told how I can manage. I just hadn't considered it, that's all."
"And you'll have had offers of help no doubt?"
"My dear if ever you hear of a responsible woman, what we used to call a cook general in the old days, who'll have nothing whatever to do in the daytime on vast wages, then you'll be my saviour."
"That wasn't what I meant in the least."
"But Jane I can't run to the expense of a married couple."
"And have the husband drinking your gin and rowing with his wife all day, I should think not indeed!"
"What did you have in mind then?"
"Marriage John."
"There can't be a double ceremony, they're so vulgar. Besides who'd have me?"
"Are you going to marry your Liz my dear?"
"Now Jane what is all this?"
"You should grant me certain privileges my loved one" she said staring at him until he looked away. "The years as they roll on give me a sort of wretched right" she announced. "And I'll not sit idly by and see you make yourself miserable just because Mary says she must leave home."
"There's no question, none at all!"
"But yes! Oh my dear you're going to be so lonely!"
"About Liz I mean."
"Are you sure?"
"No Jane how can you say am I sure? I still know what goes on around me I should hope."
"Does one ever?"
"I swear to you not a word's been said."
"Now John that makes not a scrap of difference, does it?"
"Yet to get married you have to say so don't you?"
"It's the final thing you say, yes."
"You will go on talking in riddles Jane."
"My dear I give you simple plain common or garden sense. You are like all men, lawyers every single one. You think there's no contract until you've said yes or had your answer but the chances are you've unofficially sworn yourself away forever all unbeknownst quite months before. Which makes it so wicked when you try and back out."
"Now Jane to what is this referring?"
"Nothing my dear, at all."
"You were."
"On my honour. The past's past. The little I'm saying is, she has her heart on you."
"Well I suppose I might do worse at that."
"There you go, utterly sweet, completely deceitful!"
He laughed. "But you just put the idea right into my mind" he objected.
"I did nothing of the sort. And John, don't bridle in that delighted way when I suggest someone might like to be married to you. I can't bear false modesty, which can be one of your little faults my dean There are literally thousands of unattached women sitting by their telephones this very minute waiting waiting for the call that never comes."