McNulty’s class was still buzzing from all the drama. I had to face them on my own, as Spider had been suspended for three weeks. As it turned out, he never went back to school again. I guess if he’d known that, he’d have done more than give Jordan a black eye and a split lip. There were rumors flying around about him being interviewed by the police, all sorts, and what Jordan was going to do to him when they were both back in circulation. But for the time being, they enjoyed sticking the boot into me.
“What you gonna do without your boyfriend here? No one to defend your honor.”
“Jem and Spider sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.”
Obviously, I told them where to go, but it didn’t make any difference. They were like a pack of dogs with a bone.
I took it for a couple of days and then I couldn’t stomach it anymore. I’d set off for school like normal, then cut off ’round the back of the shops, make my way across to the park or down to the canal, and hang out on my own. Don’t feel sorry for me, it was just what I was used to. Been the same everywhere I’d lived, every school I’d been to. You can put up with a certain amount, but it gets to a point when you can’t take it any longer, you just need to be away from it. Lots of kids feel like that, but especially me. School lumps you in with so many people, like so many battery hens, and, as you know, I don’t really do other people. Everything’s easier if I keep myself to myself.
Those few days I did a good job of keeping out of Spider’s way, too. I saw him a couple of times, but I made sure he didn’t see me. That whole thing at school had been, well, embarrassing. What did he think he was doing, wading in like that, making a scene of us both? Made me feel a bit sad when I thought about it. For a few weeks there, I’d had a friend, sort of. But like everything else, it’d got too complicated, it had to stop. If the Jordan incident had shown me anything, it had shown me what I already knew: Spider was trouble, the sort of trouble I didn’t need. Kind of missed him, though.
And, what do you know? I couldn’t keep him out of my life, anyway. Like a bad smell that follows you around, or a piece of chewing gum stuck on your shoe, Spider turned up again soon enough. You might say I couldn’t shake him. You might say we were meant to be together.
Anyway, that Wednesday I’d taken my eye off the ball for a minute. I was watching someone, an old dosser. He’d bumped into me ten minutes before, asked me for some money, and I’d followed him along the High Street. Now he was digging about in a dumpster on the other side of the road, and I was leaning against a wall, watching, when a familiar sourness drifted into my nostrils and someone said in my ear, “Whatcha doing?”
My attention was all on the old bloke, so I didn’t look ’round or nothing, just said to him, like we’d only seen each other five minutes ago, “Spider, what’s the date today?”
“Dunno, twenty-fifth?”
The old bloke had pulled something out of the dumpster, half a burger in its wrapper. He looked around quickly, seeing if anyone else was after it, and our eyes met for a second. There it was again, his number: 11252010.
He tucked the burger under his armpit and crossed his arms, then started scuttling off down the road. I set off after him.
“Where you going?” Spider called out, puzzled.
“I wanna go this way.”
He caught up with me. “What for?”
I stopped, keeping an eye on Grandpa as he weaved his way through the crowds, and lowered my voice. “I wanna follow that guy, the old one in the sweater.”
“What you up to? We don’t need to rob no one, Jem. I got money.” He patted his pocket. “If you want something, just ask.”
“No, I don’t wanna rob him, just follow him. Like we’re spies,” I said quickly, trying to make it into a game.
His face said, You’ve lost your marbles, but he just shrugged and said, “OK.” And we kept on walking, stepping up the pace as Grandpa turned a corner ahead of us. He’d gone down a side street, not so many people there. We got within about thirty feet of him when he turned ’round and clocked us. He knew I’d seen him get that burger out of the trash. Looking startled and shifty, he turned ’round again and started half running, half walking.
“We’ve been rumbled, man,” Spider said. “Whatcha wanna do now?”
I wanted to see what would happen to him, but I didn’t want to frighten the old guy, not on his last day.
“Let’s hang back a bit. He’s heading for the park, yeah? Let’s let him get in there and then go in. Wanna smoke?”
We lit up and then started walking slowly toward the park. At the far end of the street, Grandpa was hurrying along. He got to the end, where the main road is, with the park on the other side. He checked under his arm – yeah, the burger was still there – then looked back over his shoulder. Although we were way back, I knew that he could see us, that he was getting agitated. I was about to say to Spider that we should call it quits when, still looking back, Grandpa stepped out into the road.
The car hit him straight on with a sickening thud. He went halfway up onto the hood and then flew through the air. It was like one of those road safety commercials on TV, but they use dummies for that, don’t they? This was real – a real body, limbs waving crazily, head jerking forward and then back, finally lying on the ground.
We stood still for a few seconds, taking it in. People were screaming, starting to gather ’round. Spider started to run toward them. “Come on, let’s see if he’s alright.” I hung back. I didn’t want to see any more. If he wasn’t dead now, he would be soon, before midnight, anyway. Today was his day. Nothing you could do about it.
Spider was at the end of the street now, craning over the throng. I went up behind him. Someone near me was screaming, high-pitched, on and on. Her friend led her away. I could see through the gaps to the body. A heap of mismatched old clothes with something inside. Not someone, not anymore. Whoever he was had gone now. Gone to wherever people go, where my mum was. Heaven? More like hell for my mum, I should think. Or nowhere. Just gone.
I touched Spider’s arm. “Let’s go.” He peeled himself away from the crowd and we headed off toward his house.
Spider was subdued, shaking his head. “We freaked him out, man. He was scared.”
“I know,” I said quietly. He had echoed the thought that was haunting me: We’d caused it. I’d chased him into that road. If it wasn’t for me, he’d have been sat in that park, eating his manky old burger. Perhaps that’s what would have taken him, choking on a gobful of meat and bun. Perhaps he was heading for a heart attack. And the thought that I tried to keep down, but which kept coming back up: Perhaps it hadn’t been his last day today after all. Maybe meeting me had made it his last day.
Before I knew it, we were at Spider’s. I stopped at the gate. “I think I’ll just head back to Karen’s,” I said. I needed some space to get my head around all this.
“No, man, come inside for a bit. You don’t wanna be alone after something like that.”
I had another reason to hesitate. Those hazel eyes that saw my secrets.
Sure enough, Val was sitting on her perch in the kitchen. Spider bent to kiss her.
“Got off early, did you?” she asked, glancing at the kitchen clock.
“What?” Half-one. “You know I’ve been suspended, Nan. What’s wrong with you – losing your marbles? And Jem’s got…private tutoring.” He grinned, and Val smiled with him. She knew the score.
“You two going to settle down and read some books now, then?” Her gaze switched to me – direct, seeing, nowhere to hide.
“Actually we need to chill a bit. Just saw an old bloke get run over.”
She put down her cigarette.
“He alright, was he?”
“No, killed him. Died right there, on that road near the park. We saw it all.” There was a little quiver in his voice. Not such a tough guy after all.