- Escort the sinner! - the voice of his highness rang out.
And then they - several brawny men in white cassocks - pushed him outside. I didn’t recognize him - I would most certainly never recognize him should we meet in different circumstances - he looked like the former Chris I knew since childhood no more. He awfully grown old and hardly dragged his feet, so four assistants had to constantly jog and push him - there was a blood visible on his face. “Tortures?”, - a thought flashed in my mind.
- Teacher, Chris! - I cried out loudly, trying to overcome the noise of the strengthening wind.
He turned back. A weak smile appeared on his dried up lips.
- Peter, my sonny, is that you? They caught you too, yes? Forgive me, sonny … please forgive me … I should foresee that that will once happen.
- Teacher, but why?! Why everything has come to this at last? Did they … have they been lying to us all that time?!
It was still visible that Chris smiled once more with his not obeying lips.
- And here and now, my sonny, you have awakened at last, - he muttered, - and during that same instant a roar of the gushed wind silenced all other sounds.
I saw, how four men dragged my mentor somewhere in the direction of a building’s corner - I tried to rush for aid, only to have been instantly seized by same three men, dressed in white cassocks.
- Stop twitching, oh brother, - smiled one of them.
When several seconds after his holiness appeared before my eyes once again - I was surprised no longer.
- And as for you, my son … we must perform the procedure of … cleaning, so that your brain can become sacred and holy once more and not a single demon even had the chance to crept into it! - and he smiled. - Seize him! In the name of the Patriarch!
My entire world ruined in a single flash of time. Everything I trusted, all that I hoped for - everything became nothing. All was in vain. And when my … brothers … seized me - I resisted no more. That was no longer necessary.
“May the Divine will guide me forevermore”, - a thought came an instant before a weighty wooden club of one of white brothers landed on my head …
25.06.2011
I am always alone
Please forgive me, for I cannot tell you of it. We simply must part our ways. It’s everything you need to know.
- But I do not understand … have I caused some harm to you ? I loved you and still do love.
- Do not say it like so, it only makes things worse.
- But why ? Why should we part with each other ?
- I have another man. I do not love you.
* * *
- Ye, driveller, what’s the fuck do I need you for ? Go and sing your serenades to some pensive sixteen-year old silly girlie ! You are just not the man for ye cannot financially support your girl ! And I have already seen such ones in my life – and trust me, they simply don’t survive. The law of natural selection, right ? And you are – the evolutionary flaw. Either you stop bringing some poetic nonsense and show me real money, or we are parting our ways today !
- We are parting our ways.
* * *
- No, not like so. No, no that way. So … like so … more .. more … Oh … how nice ! More … here … like that. With you … it’s so … so good with you … so good for me.
- I … I have become attached to you … I don’t know, how … how I will live alone for now…
- Hey, let’s not start that … ok ? Don’t think you can buy me with your words. You … know the terms.
- I know … I know it all. Sometimes it seems to me that I … know too much. The price … the price is still the same ?
- Yes, the same. And let us agree that it will be currency from now on, instead of barter. We are not living in the Stone Age, are we ?
* * *
- And do these four years together, do they really mean nothing to you ?
She has approached me, twisted her hands round my neck, and steadfastly and sadly has looked in my eyes.
- They mean everything for me. These were the best ones in my entire life, whether you believe it or not. You have given me so much … I have never met a man like you before … and probably will never meet anymore … Will live like … live like … all normal people…
Her eyes filled with tears. I have embraced her and pushed to myself.
- Let us not leave each other, ok ? After all, it’s what we wanted … to be together for all our lives … together to the last breath ...
- Oh my God, how would I have wanted it to be so ! How would I want to never leave you … never … to … that you always … with each sunrise, with each new day come to me … and I come to you … and we were with each other, and would both rejoice and grieve together … together … oh, how I would like that ! But … I cannot … cannot … not now …
- And still we have to part our ways … after all … forever ?
- Yes … forever. And you know this well. You know … I have a legal husband and cannot leave him … I cannot.
* * *
- You know, now it starts to seem that I will never meet her. The only her, whom I would really fall in love with … who will love me … the one, who can become the only one … the only possible woman of my life.
- I believe you make your conclusions too early. Not all is lost at all.
- But not everything was found as well. And will it be found, I wonder ? How small is the chance that among all the variety of people I can see and find her ! I would rather stop trying for now, I am too tired of this pursuit of phantoms, too tired … perhaps, I would rather be alone for now – always alone. I have come to this world lonely, and I should leave it the same way.
- We all have to. That doesn’t mean, however, that we are destined to be lonely for our entire life from the beginning and up to the end. You will still meet her, of that I am sure.
- Maybe. Possibly this unique day will once come, when I will meet her … finally find her. Maybe so. I really want to believe in that.
31.10.2010
Life is ahead
“Hey, you, there!”, - a shout came from behind.
A little boy of twelve or thirteen years - almost teenager - darted off and ran away. They, no doubt, will chase him - will chase a thief ... He had to come off - by all means possible. A pair of quarters - and a saving entrance there ... a saving cellar, where he can lie down and hide - to hide until his organism will not demand a share - a share of food and ... something that aided him to pass away these painful days of loneliness. His life without a roof over a head, with no parents, almost with nothing - a life all way along with himself and with what he is going to buy for the stolen money. He opened stolen bag on a move ... a wallet ... one ... two ... three coupons ... two thousands of roubles! These people were certainly going to purchase something today. What a hellish disappointment - they won’t ... but he most definitely will!
He turned on a run and almost screamed from a fright. The man was catching up with him - a distance between them was reducing slowly, but steadily. He in his thirteen years was no match for a healthy adult.
Two quarters, just two quarters and he is saved! He sharply jumped into lateral pass between houses. He has to foul the trail - then he can escape ... then he must escape. Forward, all forward! My feet, help me – more than once you have already rescued me in street collisions - aid me just once more!