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“Nell, take your clothes off or we will start the discipline. I’ll start with twenty smacks, and I promise you’ll still be naked at the end of it.”

Well, put that way, she should just do it. She could see plainly that he wasn’t going to make this easy on her, and she was okay with that. She could have had any number of men or boys who would have just taken her because she was available, but she’d wanted someone who wanted her. Henry’s dark eyes held hers. He wanted her. Nell Finn.

Her hands shook slightly as she undid the buttons of her shirt.

“That’s what I want,” he whispered. “I’ll take care of you, Nell. Do you understand what I mean? Do your books cover that?”

Tears filled her eyes. Yes, her books covered that. If she did as he asked, they were entering a kind of contract where he would offer her affection and comfort and protection in return for trust and acceptance. All in all, it was a sweet trade and so much more honest than anything she’d been offered before. “Yes, Henry.”

“Oh, I like to hear that. No Sirs or Masters. Just ‘yes, Henry.’” He winked at her as his hand found the fly of his pants and started to work the zipper. “Show me your breasts, Nell. I’ve been thinking about them since the minute you walked into Bill’s office. You walked in and I’ve been hard ever since. I’m going to be gentle, but don’t think for a second that I haven’t been hot for you all day long.”

She let the shirt fall to the bed. He was being honest, and she would do the same. She wasn’t some teenager who didn’t understand the world. She knew how it worked. Despite her deep love of happily ever afters, she knew the most she could hope for was a happily ever now. She did kind of wish that organic cotton bras came in more attractive fashions. Hers was pretty industrial looking.

“Slowly, Nell. Take it off slowly.”

She reached around and managed to unhook it. She was deeply aware that she was awkward, but Henry didn’t seem to mind. And neither did little Henry, and by little Henry she meant big penis. He pushed aside his pants and let his cock pop free. Henry’s cock was large and gorgeous, with a beautiful bulbous head. Thick and purple, it pulsed in his hand as he stroked it up and down. His big hand gripped his dick, running from the base to the bulb as his eyes watched her.

She peeled the bra off slowly, her nipples peaking in the chilly air. She’d been naked plenty of times. Her mother loved it up here at Mountain and Valley. They came up for social hours and parties and Nell never had a single qualm about getting down to her birthday suit, but it felt different now. She felt his eyes on her. Her nipples were hard pebbles. She was going to lose her virginity. She was going to lose her heart. It suddenly hit her that she would love Henry Flanders after this, and he hadn’t promised her anything.

But nothing was certain. Nothing in the whole world. And love was worth the risk. She couldn’t know that he wanted her for anything more than a night. She could only try. She wanted him. She thought she might be able to really care about him. And if he took her without any caring, that was on him, not her.

But not trying would be on her.

She’d waited for so long, but this was the right man.

She let the bra fall away.

Henry’s sigh filled the room. “You are so fucking gorgeous, baby.”

His beautiful dark eyes were sleepy and laser focused on her breasts. She felt them like a hand caressing her. His voice was a deep rich chocolate, and she could hear the approval in it. It ran down her spine, a sweet shiver that went straight to all her girl parts.

“I think you’re lovely, too, Henry.”

A slow smile crossed his face. “You would think that.” His hand ran up and down his thick cock. “Take off your pants. I want to see your pussy.”

Her whole body flushed. How could he just talk that way? He didn’t have a single problem with dirty words. She’d always found them repulsive until they came out of his mouth in that dark voice of his. Her hands moved almost of their own volition, curving under the waist of her undies and pushing them down. She tossed them off the bed, and she was completely naked and open to Henry Flanders’s eyes.

He sighed, the sound a long, wanting brush against her body. “That’s just about perfect, baby. You shave. Why?”

“I don’t like the whole hair thing.” She frowned. She sometimes felt she was in the minority in the protesting world. She knew a couple of very smart women who could probably braid their underarm hair. She’d never seen a lack of grooming as a good protesting measure. “I know it’s weird, but I feel better like this.”

“Oh, you look better like that. If you were mine, I would have you lasered, baby. I don’t want anything between me and my pussy.” His hand just ran up and down his cock, the length of flesh hard and unrelenting. There was a pearly drop at the tip. His hand flicked over it, using it to make his strokes flow more smoothly. She responded to the sight. Her pussy seemed to pulse as though she could feel everything he was doing to his own cock.

It was wrong. She shouldn’t allow some man to tell her what she would do, but she kind of wanted to, and making the decision for herself was the very essence of feminism. She wanted to play with Henry Flanders. She understood what it meant going in, so she wasn’t fooling herself. He was here for a brief time. She could have him while he was here. She wanted any time he could give her.

Maybe it made her pathetic to be willing to take so little, but it also made her human and a woman. Women never knew what they would get going into a relationship. Women just cared and hoped for the best and, when they were really smart, forgave themselves if it all went to hell. That last part was the most important part of all. Forgiveness began at home.

“You look so serious, Nell. This is supposed to be fun.”

“It’s supposed to be sacred.”

His face fell. His hand came away from his cock. She’d said the wrong thing. Silence encroached, and she was deeply aware of just how vulnerable she was.

“You’re right,” he replied slowly. “It’s a sacred thing for a woman like you. I want to be here with you, Nell. I want it more than anything I’ve wanted in a long time, but I don’t know that I can stay here with you and I know damn well I won’t bring you into my world. I feel more for you than I’ve felt for any woman in years, but I won’t take something from you that you would rather wait to give. I’m not a good man, Nell. I’m rather awful, but I promise I’ll take care of you as long as I’m here. I won’t look at another woman. I’ll only think about you. I’ll be yours one hundred percent while I’m here.”

Could she really ask for more? He was being honest. He couldn’t stay and she couldn’t go. She had to stay with her mom. Her mother needed her. They were worlds apart, but they wanted each other. It was so much harder to be honest. He could have promised her to stay or to take her with him, but he’d been brave. He’d tried to set her expectations. He’d been a real man.

“I still want you, Henry, but I’ll be honest with you, too. I can’t go into this telling you that it won’t mean anything to me. It will. I’ll remember you always. You’ll always be my first lover.”

He stood up, and for a second she worried he would run out the door. “I won’t forget you, either, Nell. I know you might not believe me, but you’re different from the other women I’ve had. You’re meaningful. Even when I leave, you should know that I won’t forget you. All you have to do is tell Bill you need me and I’ll come back. I meant what I said. I’ll take care of you, Nell. If you give yourself to me tonight, it means something. It is sacred.”

She couldn’t ask for more than that. “I would like to be with you, Henry. For however long you choose to stay.”