She searched Aaron’s face and feelings for any sign of jealousy and found none. He was too relieved to have her back. He rested his head on the bed on her pillow and laced his fingers through hers. She felt him studying her hand, the rings on her finger.
She ran her thumb over his matching wedding band. She knew so much about this man from Ford’s words and what she now felt from him, and yet she had so much to learn. Or relearn.
But she knew for certain the only thing she needed to know about him, and Caph—she felt safe and beyond loved.
“Go to sleep,” he whispered in her ear. “I love you.” He squeezed her hand and she squeezed back. She hurt and felt exhausted and was more than happy to take his suggestion.
When she awoke again, Ford was sitting next to her, awake and watching her, with Aaron dozing on the couch.
Caph was still asleep on her other side, his mouth open as he softly snored, a thin string of drool running down his cheek and puddling on the bed.
Then a long, low, rippling fart from him broke the silence.
Despite the pain, she suppressed a laugh. He was so cute. They’d given him enough drugs to keep him knocked out all night, at Dr. Graymard’s orders. Probably the first good sleep he’d had in months.
Ford followed her gaze and smiled. When he looked into her eyes, she read his sadness. They’d both understood, once she realized the probability of the situation, that their short-lived happiness couldn’t be. That hadn’t stopped either of them from hoping.
As upset as Aaron and Caph were, it had still been Ford’s baby.
She’d been wrong about Ford likely never feeling sadness again. Despite being reunited as a family, his grief broke through. He tried to keep it from her and couldn’t. Emi understood her own need to grieve, with him and alone, but she wanted her focus to be her men and getting through the next few days.
Of reuniting as a family.
He touched his forehead to hers and kissed her before resting against the bed.
She closed her eyes and, feeling safe and loved, let the darkness envelop her.
Aaron awoke when Yanna returned after midnight. Before he could wake Ford, the other man sat up and stretched, then locked eyes with Aaron and tipped his head toward the door.
Aaron nodded and patted Yanna on the shoulder as he and Ford left the room while Yanna took the seat next to Emi’s bed. Caph would, hopefully, sleep for several more hours.
Two Beyant guards fell into step behind them.
Aaron turned. “You guys don’t have to come with us.”
“Yeah, they do,” Ford said. “You haven’t fully grasped the situation. We’re under diplomatic protection now.”
Aaron felt too tired to contemplate or argue it. They returned to the Tamora Bight and the two guards stayed outside at the hatchway. Once the two of them were safely sealed, alone, inside their ship, Aaron pulled Ford to him and hugged him. Then he crushed his lips against Ford’s, backing him against the wall as he ravaged his mouth with desperation and relief.
“I will kill you, you son of a bitch, for putting us through this,” he rumbled when he finally lifted his head.
Ford laughed. “Sorry, Cap.”
He slammed Ford against the wall again, hard, knocking the wind out of him before enveloping him in a crushing bear hug. “You don’t need a fucking chip, you need a goddamned leash.” He finally released him and stepped back. “I’m sorry.” He turned and started for their quarters.
Ford quickly fell into step beside him. “Sorry for what? I kinda think I deserved that, actually.”
“For not having faith like you did,” he admitted. “I didn’t want to believe she was dead, but I didn’t see any hope. You had hope for all of us.”
They reached their quarters. Ford followed Aaron into the head where Aaron stripped, dropping his clothes to the floor, and stepped into the shower.
“Get your ass in here,” he said, holding the door for Ford.
Ford smiled, stripped, and stepped inside with him. Aaron started the water.
“Ah!” Ford sighed. “Clear water.” He let it run over him as Aaron wrapped his arms around him from behind and showered kisses along his shoulders.
“I missed you. We lost her and then you were gone.” He sniffled.
Ford turned and hugged him, held him. “Hey, I’m back. You and me, we’ll get the big guy through it, and we’ll get her through it, and we’ll get to live our happily ever after.”
Aaron rained more kisses along the side of Ford’s neck. “I’m sorry about the baby,” Aaron softly said.
Ford’s expression darkened as he stepped away, back under the water, his eyes closed against the spray. His voice sounded choked. “Yeah. If I’d known she could have gotten pregnant, I would have been careful and not let it happen. It’s my fault. She could have died if it’d happened sooner and farther from Mars. I’m a medic, not a surgeon. I couldn’t have saved her with their technology. I don’t know anything about pregnancies or babies except how to make them.”
“Are you okay?”
Ford found the shampoo and lathered his body. “You want the truth?”
“Yeah. Of course.”
“No. I’m not okay.”
“Is there anything I can do for you?”
Ford wouldn’t open his eyes to look at him, just shook his head.
Aaron didn’t feel the slightest bit romantic. He suspected Ford didn’t either. After their shower, they crawled into bed together, entwined in each other’s arms.
“Oh, jeez this feels good,” Ford sighed. “Home sweet home.”
Aaron kissed Ford. “You two aren’t going anywhere alone for a long time, you realize that, right? Caph and I aren’t letting you out of our sight.”
Ford patted his arm. “Believe me, I don’t want to go anywhere. I just want to get her healed up and not even think about the future right now.” He paused. “You realize the antidote might not bring her memory back, right?”
Aaron hugged him more tightly. “I don’t care. She’s alive. That’s all I care about. She’s alive, and the four of us are together again.”
For the first time in nearly a year, Aaron slept deeply and without interruptions.
Or nightmares.
Donna sat alone and cross-legged in the command chair on the bridge of the Kendall Kant. The men had learned not to press her to talk, or to argue with her when she took most of the night watches now, such as she had tonight. Encapsuled in her grief, she sought out their company only when she felt strong enough to handle it.
She was, in fact, so engrossed in her book that she almost reached out to hit mute on the communication alert until it finally struck her that it indicated an official communiqué from DSMC.
With a resigned sigh, she bookmarked her page and shut down the handheld before turning to the command console. “Why the fuck can’t they just leave us alone?” she muttered.
They’d received several bullshit notifications from the DSMC headquarters over the past several days. It did nothing but interrupt their surveys.
Her eyebrow arched when she realized this wasn’t just a message, but a video. Directly from Dr. Graymard.
And it was marked to her personal attention, requiring her code to unlock and view it.
With a hard, frozen ball of cold dread congealing in her stomach, she hesitated.
She didn’t want to know. She wanted to hold on to the faith deep inside her that, someday, Emi would be found alive.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She’d have to watch it eventually. It would keep nagging at her until she did. And if not her, one of the guys would see the notice when they came on duty and Rob would override her and watch it.
With a trembling finger, she punched in her code and hugged her knees to her chest.