“Who else would I be with?” My reply was sharp, the change in his tone affecting mine.
“I see. And are you two still just… friends?” There was no mistaking his meaning or the leashed anger in his words now.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I snapped, guilt hitting me hard. I knew exactly what he meant. “What do you care if I’m in Vegas with Kade or what we do here? In case you’ve forgotten, Blane, you and I broke up.”
“That doesn’t mean I stopped loving you. I just never imagined you’d come between Kade and me like this.”
“That’s not fair,” I said. “You know that’s the last thing I ever wanted. None of this would have even happened if you had listened to me instead of your uncle.”
“Don’t bring my uncle into this—he has nothing to do with it.”
“Bullshit!” I exploded. “He has everything to do with it! He tried to buy me off months ago to stop dating you, and when that didn’t work, he made up an affair between me and Kade that you never should have believed!” I was yelling now, seething with anger. “So don’t you dare try and take the high road, Blane! The blame for all of this is staring you right in the mirror.”
I ended the call, trying to get my boiling emotions under control. I was so angry and yet devastated. I buried my face in my hands.
Kade’s hands on my shoulders weren’t a surprise and I didn’t resist as he pulled my body toward his chest to envelop me in his arms. His skin was warm against my cheek and he smoothed my hair as I cried.
I was struck by how wrong this was, crying on Kade’s shoulder about Blane, and forced myself to stop. As cruel as Blane had been, he’d been right. It wasn’t going to get any better between them while I was still in the picture.
“Kade, I can’t,” I said thickly, looking up at him. “We can’t. This”—I motioned between us—“can’t happen. Things will never be right between you and Blane so long as I’m around.”
“Is that what he told you?” His eyes were intense, even in the dim light, his expression grave.
“It’s what I know,” I said. “And you know it, too.” I moved to get off his lap, but he stopped me, holding me close.
“I don’t care,” Kade said fiercely. “Stay with me. Just a little longer. You’ve been happy with me—could be happy with me. Just give us some more time.”
His plea tore at me. I felt like I was standing on a precipice that held nothing but empty days and nights ahead of me, endless stretches filled with loneliness and despair. I had to let Kade go or risk the two of them being estranged forever.
Could we have just a little more time? Kade was right—I’d been the closest to content and happy in the past twenty-four hours with him than at any other time in the past three months. And I didn’t want to give that up. Not yet. It was selfish of me, but I wanted just a little more happy, something to tide me over in the bleak near future that awaited me.
I gave a reluctant nod. “But you have to promise me that this won’t go any further. I won’t drive an even bigger wedge between you and Blane.”
Kade kissed me, his palms cradling my face. “I promise,” he murmured against my lips. I clung to him. His kisses were like a forbidden drug, comforting and sensual. His desire for me was a heady thing.
I allowed him to lead me back to his bed, where he again laid me down spoon style, his arm draped across my waist.
“Go to sleep,” he murmured into my ear. His hand rhythmically stroked my hair, relaxing my tense body.
My eyes were heavy and I sighed, exhaustion and the emotional turmoil taking their toll. I felt safe and protected, cherished even, in Kade’s arms. I yearned to close my eyes and wish all my problems away. But nothing’s that easy.
When I woke again I was still in Kade’s arms. I turned to look at him, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. He was awake.
“Did you sleep?” I asked.
“No.”
“Why not? Are you all right?”
“Why would I waste the time I have with you sleeping?” he asked with a lopsided smile. “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”
I didn’t smile. That remark may have been a joke for anyone else, but for Kade it had been a near reality too many times for me to find it funny.
I brushed my lips across his chest before pulling away. My eyes felt like sandpaper and I really wanted to brush my teeth. I rolled out of bed and walked to the bathroom, feeling Kade’s eyes on me the whole way.
I showered, wrapping myself in a towel afterward. My clothes were in the other bedroom, but when I left Kade’s to head that way, I smelled coffee and changed direction to peek into the living room.
Kade had thrown on a pair of jeans and was setting a tray on the dining table. He must have sensed my presence, because he turned around.
“Hungry?” he asked. The way his eyes raked me from head to toe told me he had more than food on the brain.
I had to be strong. What had happened last night—and I shivered just thinking about it—couldn’t happen again, not if I wanted to be able to live with myself afterward.
“Is there coffee?”
“Of course.” His smirk clearly signaled that he knew I had to have my coffee. He poured a cup and handed it to me.
“What time is it?” I asked, adding sugar and cream to the steaming cup.
“Almost noon.”
I about dropped the cup. “Seriously?” I hadn’t slept that well or that long in months, which explained why I actually felt rested this morning, even after the middle-of-the-night phone call with Blane.
Blane. My thoughts skittered away from him. I couldn’t think about him right now, wouldn’t ruin the moment by dwelling on how horrible our conversation had gone last night.
“I’m going to take a shower,” Kade said. “You eat and get dressed. Let’s go have some fun.” His eyes widened suggestively, the way he said “fun” making it sound like an endeavor of the utmost importance.
I wasn’t hungry but drank more coffee while I dressed and blow-dried my hair. Guilt gnawed at me even as I tried not to think about all of it.
I should be on a plane home. I shouldn’t have agreed to stay. Blane knows I’m here, knows who I’m with.…
The coffee cup slipped from my shaking fingers and shattered on the marble sink. Coffee and porcelain went everywhere, including on me.
“Shit,” I cursed under my breath. I didn’t want Kade to see. He was so pleased I was staying, I couldn’t let him know the guilt I felt. It didn’t matter if I was happy with Kade, had been so thrilled to see him turn up on my doorstep. I was a selfish brat to still be there. But I couldn’t leave. I promised him I’d stay.
I needed a drink.
I walked into the living room, listening to the distant sound of Kade’s shower running. The bar had plenty of vodka and I reached for a bottle, then grabbed a glass.
Crap. No ice.
Taking one of the room keys and the ice bucket, I stopped by the door to Kade’s bathroom.
“I’m going to get some ice!” I called out. I wasn’t sure whether he heard me or not, but I’d be back in a few minutes anyway. Grabbing one of his white shirts, I took off my stained cami and pulled it on, tying the tails so it wouldn’t be so long on me.
I padded down the thickly carpeted hallway in my bare feet, wishing I’d checked out the room’s welcome packet so I knew where to find ice. Surely it couldn’t be far.…
But damned if I wasn’t wrong. I searched what felt like the whole floor and was about to give up. A detour down one last corridor and I was done—I’d drink bourbon instead.
I turned a corner, then stopped short. There, not twenty feet in front of me, was David. Looked like he’d gotten untied without a problem.