“Momonga-san, I’m really sorry for saying this, but aren’t you a born loser like me, Momonga-san? No matter how hard you try, you’ll never be able to lead a comfortable life.”
“Well, I didn’t try that hard to begin with anyway, so I think I’m getting what I deserve. Besides, it beats being bored. I get paid, after all, and I don’t mind sinking my money into Yggdrasil.”
“…Well, I guess that’s true. Maybe you’re a half-loser then. Personally, I only made it through elementary school. I think it was the same for you, am I right, Momonga-san?”
Ulbert seemed to have brought it up in the past, according to Momonga’s recollections. Indeed, his attitude towards Ulbert had changed since then. At first he thought it was pity, but now it would seem he was feeling a sort of kinship to him instead.
“That’s true. However, being able to find a job with elementary school education isn’t bad, right?”
"If they didn’t teach you the bare minimum in elementary school, you couldn’t even become a subordinate to the born winners, so they made elementary school easy… Honestly, it’s ridiculous how you end up at one of two extremes in this world from birth. It’s insane how unfair this world is. You can climb the ranks if you work hard? Don’t make me laugh.”
Compared to Ulbert’s cloying, sludgy resentment for society, his dislike for Touch Me was laughable at best. Momonga marvelled at Ulbert’s ability to hate.
“Ulbert-san—”
“My parents died pretty horribly. Working in such a dangerous place… they couldn’t even find their bones, you know. And the compensation they paid to their employees was miserable. That’s why they didn’t stop the production lines. After all, stopping them would incur huge losses. Losers like us… they use us up and throw us away.”
Momonga suddenly recalled his own mother.
“…That’s how it was, huh. That’s what happened to your parents, Ulbert-san? My mother worked herself to death. When I woke up in the morning I saw her collapsed in the kitchen. Even lashed with fatigue, she pushed herself to make my favorite dish. If only she hadn’t worried about it and just taken a rest instead… she might still be around now… When I found her, her body was already ice cold… at least, that’s how I remember it. My memory’s a bit hazy on that count.”
After a brief silence, he was answered by a voice which sounded like it had been forced out.
“…I’m sorry for bringing up such an unpleasant topic.”
“Don’t worry about it, I barely remember it myself…”
“…Still, I apologize for it… all in all, I personally can’t stand the winners. Although it’s not like Touch-san did anything wrong…”
“I understand. However, how should I say this…? What happens out there has nothing to do with what happens here. Look, I’m enjoying myself too, right? So… how shall I say this… it would be good if you could enjoy yourself too, Ulbert-san. If I’m not wrong, it’s not like you don’t want to mix with the others, right? So, uh, how shall I put it—?”
“Ah — it’s just like you said. Ahhhh, I’m sorry for causing you all this trouble, Momonga-san. I’ll do my best not to throw tantrums from now on.”
“Then I’ll leave that to you. We should probably wrap this up around now.”
“Got it. Although, the thing about this game is—”
“Speaking of which, Chagama-san, shouldn’t I make those undead adjutants around now?”
“Hm? You should save the skills which cost experience until the end, so either a Death Grandpa or a Death Grandma should be fine, right?”
Obviously, the monsters were not actually called Death Grandpa or Grandma. They were merely nicknames for the monsters known as the Death Emperor and the Death Empress.
“That’s true. So, Grandpa or Grandma? Since our vanguards are happily cleaving through the enemy, Grandpa would be better, right?”
“Well, they do look pretty motivated…”
As they loudly taunted their opponents as mooks, small fry and the like, Nishiki Enrai and Warrior Takemikazuchi laid into the undead with powerful blows. The reason that they could attack so unreservedly was most likely due to Bukubukuchagama’s masterful hate management.
“After all, we still have resources. Heeeeeeey, Yama-chan, Yama-chan~”
As she waited for the right moment to use a skill while the undead mauled her, Bukubukuchagama called out to Yamaiko, who stood behind them with a healing wand.
“Yes, Chagama-san?’
“It’s Kazecchi~”
“…That again? Then, what’s the matter, Kazecchi?”
“How’s your MP? How well can you heal everyone?”
“It’s fine. Actually, I’ve been healing with a wand since just now.”
Even wands imbued with high-tier spells would only heal about half as much as Yamaiko could if she personally cast a healing spell. Still, that was adequate for the task at hand, which was a sign of how well the three frontliners had played their roles.
“I see~ then, could you not summon your switch attacker right now, Momonga-san?”
“Got it. Then, I’ll await your instructions.”
“Ahhh~ that’s not necessary. I’ll leave that to your own discretion, Momonga-san. I trust you.”
“I’ll do my best, but let me know if I mess up.”
“Mm, of course. Though I feel your skills are pretty good, so it should be fine, Momonga-san. If you train yourself, you can get even better — oops, hate control, hate control…”
She must have used a skill that built hate. The undead, who had been wavering a little, turned to assault Bukubukuchagama again.
She was immune to the negative status effects that undead could inflict, like poison or paralysis.
In other words, she was the perfect tank.
Of course, Momonga could not keep staring at her.
He cast a tenth-tier spell which was naturally targeted on Bukubukuchagama.
“「Ultimate Disturb」.”
Technically, there was no need to speak when casting spells, but one’s colleagues would not know what was going on if nothing was said. Therefore, magic casters announced their spell names as a sort of courtesy.
“Thank you~ and now—”
And because he observed that courtesy, Bukubukuchagama could spring into action right away.
Thanks to this spell, Bukubukuchagama’s magic resistance rapidly increased, and the hate which should have been allotted to Momonga instead went to her.
She was a very skilled player. Her swift and accurate judgements, born of long experience with the game, placed her firmly in the top class of Yggdrasil’s players.
In particular, she was skilled at hate management, which was a difficult task since hate was a hidden value. There was virtually no way to know how much hate any given action produced without personal experience. Being able to do such a thing in the data-heavy Yggdrasil was a feat that required long hours of battles and practice.
In a sense, Momonga admired Bukubukuchagama.
“Well, if there was a way to cast this on the enemy, their caster-types would be useless,” Ulbert muttered as he used a wand to cast spells.
「Ultimate Disturb」 was a spell which greatly increases an ally’s magic resistance, at the price of wrecking their ability to cast spells. It was plainly obvious that one could neuter an enemy mage if the spell could be cast on them.
“Well, I doubt you could ever pull that trick off,” Yamaiko replied as she cast a healing spell from her wand.
In contrast, Bukubukuchagama chimed in with approval.
“You shouldn’t say that, Yama-chan~ people discover new things because of folks like Ulbert-san who want to find them. Sometimes they might even find a loophole, but that’s expected of those shitty developers.”
And so, the battle with the undead ended, with the sense that it was an easy fight.
“If the shitty developers knew the meaning of balance, they’d probably make the boss here very strong.”
“No, if you’re going by that, the boss here would be very weak. Why would the developers know about balance? It’s been amply demonstrated in the past, right?”