"This voice shook your heart," he reminded himself. "Our ears don't mislead us, but our ignorance may. You'll have a good time laughing at yourself later, but you're a winner not a deserter. Suppose life is a tragedy; still, it's a duty to play your role in it."
"Are you going to stand like that till dawn?"
In a curiously calm voice he answered, "Let's turn out the lights."
Sitting up in bed, she said coarsely and cautiously, "On condition that I see you first in the light."
He asked disapprovingly, "Why?"
"So I can be sure you're healthy."
He stripped for this medical examination. The sight seemed ludicrous to him in the extreme. Then it was pitch-black.
When he returned to the street, he took with him a dreary heart filled with sorrow. He imagined that he and everyone else were suffering from a painful decline and that their salvation was remote. He saw Isma'il coming toward him. His friend, who looked satisfied, tired, and sarcastic, asked, "How's philosophy?"
Kamal took his arm and walked off with him, asking earnestly, "Are all women alike?"
The young man cast a questioning glance at him. After Kamal had revealed his doubts and fears in a concise fashion to Isma'il, the latter smilingly said, "In general the essential traits are the same, even if some of the accidental ones differ. You're so laughable, you deserve pity. Should I assume from your state of mind that you'll not be returning here again?"
"To the contrary, I'll come back here more often than you think. Let's have another drink". Then he continued as though to himself: "Beauty… beauty! What is beauty?"
At that moment his soul yearned for purification, isolation, and meditation. He longed to remember the tormented life he had lived in the shadow of his beloved. He seemed to believe that truth would always be cruel. Should he adopt the avoidance of truth as his creed? He walked along the road to the bar, so lost in thought that he scarcely paid any attention to Isma'il's chatter. If truth was cruel, lies were ugly.
"The problem's not that the truth is harsh but that liberation from ignorance is as painful as being born. Run after truth until you're breathless. Accept the pain involved in re-creating yourself afresh. These ideas will take a life to comprehend, a hard one interspersed with drunken moments."
107
Kamal had come to the alley by himself this evening. Inebriated, he was singing under his breath as he made his way boldly through the boisterous tide of humanity. Finding Rose's door vacant, he did not hesitate as he would have when first getting to know the alley. Instead, he headed straight for the house and entered without knocking. He climbed the stairs to the hallway and once there glanced at the closed door, where light was visible through the keyhole. He went to the waiting room, which fortunately was empty. He sat down in a wooden chair and stretched his legs out with satisfaction. A few minutes later he heard the door creak open and prepared to stand up. The other man's movements as he left the bedroom and headed for the stairs were revealed by his footsteps. Kamal tarried a few moments before rising to go into the hall. Through the open door of her room he saw Rose, who was remaking the bed. When she noticed him, she smiled and called for him to sit back down a minute. He retraced his steps, smiling with the confidence of a regular customer. He soon heard someone come up the stairs, and that upset him. He hated to have to wait with other clients, but the new arrival headed for Rose's room.
Kamal heard the woman tell this man gently, "I have a customer. Go to the parlor and wait". Then she raised her voice to summon Kamaclass="underline" "Please come in."
He rose without any hesitation and ran into the new arrival in the hall, He found himself face to face with Yasin. Their stunned eyes met. Kamal immediately looked down, seething with shame, confusion, and discomfort. He was about to run off as fast as he could, but Yasin forestalled that with a laugh so loud it reverberated strangely against the hall ceiling. The youth looked up at his brother, whose arms were opened wide as he yelled delightedly, "A thousand magnificent evenings! A thousand days of imperial splendor!" He roared with laughter as the dazed Kamal stared at him. When life started to flow through the youth again, he emerged from his stupor and a quizzical smile appeared on his lips. He regained his composure but did not lose his embarrassment.
In an oratorical tone, Yasin burst out, "This is a happy night: Thursday, October 28, 1926, a truly joyous evening. We'll have to celebrate it every year, for on this night two brothers discovered each other and it was demonstrated that the baby of the family's grown up. He's bearing aloft the banner of our glorious traditions in the world of pleasures."
Rose walked up and asked Yasin, "Your friend?"
Laughing, Yasin replied, "No, my brother. The son of my father and… No, my father's son. That says it all. So you see, you're the darling of the whole family, you nobody."
She murmured, "Swell". Then she told Kamal, "Etiquette dictates that you yield your turn to your older brother, kid."
Yasin roared his mighty laugh and said, "Etiquette dictates'! Who taught you the manners of sex? Can you imagine a brother waiting outside the door? Ha-ha…"
Giving him a warning look, she said, "If you laugh in that alarming way, drunkard, the police will hear. But you're excused, since your kid brother's always tipsy when he getshere."
Yasin looked at Kamal with astonished admiration. "You've learned that too!" he exclaimed. "My Lord, we really are blood brothers, in every way. Bring your mouth up close so I can smell it. But what's the use? A drunk can't detect the smell of liquor on anyone else's breath. Tell me now: What's your opinion of this wisdom you've gained from life instead of from books?" Then he pointed toward Rose and exclaimed, "One visit to this hussy's equivalent to reading ten banned books. So, you get drunk, Kamal…. A thousand bright days! We've been friends from the beginning. I'm the one who tau …"
"God, God! Am I going to have to wait till daybreak?"
Yasin gave Kamal a shove and said, "You go with her, and I'll wait."
But Kamal fell back, shaking his head in vehement rejection. Then he spoke for the first time: "No way! Not… not tonight". Putting his hand in his pocket, he took out ten piasters, which he gave to the woman.
Yasin cried out admiringly, "Long live gallantry! But I won't let you go off alone…". Giving Rose's shoulder a goodbye pat, he took Kamal's arm, and they left the building together.
Yasiti was saying, "We must celebrate this evening. So let's spend some time in a bar. I usually do my drinking on Muhammad Ali Street with a group of civil servants and some others, but it's not an appropriate place for you, and besides, it's far. Let's choose somewhere nearby, so we can get home in good time. Since my latest marriage, I'm as eager as you to return home early. Where did you get drunk tonight, hero?"
Kamal stammered with embarrassment, "The Finish."
"Great! Let's go there. Take advantage of this moment and make the most of it. Tomorrow when you're a teacher, visiting this district with its brothels and taverns will be difficult for you". Then, laughing, he continued: "Imagine one of your pupils running into you here…. Even so, the field of pleasure's wide open, and you'll soon advance in it to ever more beautiful experiences."
They continued on to the Finish Bar in silence. Fortunately the bond between Yasin and Kamal had not been affected by Yasin's exodus from the old house, and there was no artificial reserve between them. It was typical of Yasin to overlook his prerogatives as the eldest brother. What Kamal knew from firsthand observation of his brother's conduct as well as from other people's comments gave him every reason to believe that Yasin was addicted to women and easily influenced by passion. Even so, meeting his brother at Rose's was a violent shock, for his imagination had never pictured Yasin intoxicated or loitering down this alley. As time passed, Kamal began to recover gradually from the shock, and his alarm began to give way to confidence and even relief. When the brothers reached the Finish, they found it packed. So Yasin suggested they take a table outside, choosing one toward the edge of the sidewalk at the corner of the street, to be as far as possible from other people. Smiling, they sat down opposite each other.