“I feel like I know this type of character from All Men Are Brothers,”
Pearl told Carpenter Chan. “Please tell me the gods he worships.”
“Bumpkin Emperor worships gods and ghosts of all kinds,” Carpenter Chan said. “He invites a ba-gua master to tell him what to do before engaging in battles. He burns incense and kowtows to not only Buddha, but also to the sun god, moon goddess, god of earth, god of war, god of water, god of thunder, god of wind and rain, and even the god of animals. Bumpkin Emperor believes in supernatural powers and fears the revenge of any god.”
The three-day ultimatum had passed. Bumpkin Emperor arrested Lilac and Carpenter Chan and held a public rally. He was set to have Carpenter Chan beheaded.
It was the first time Pearl and I saw Bumpkin Emperor up close. He had a pair of big frog eyes, orange skin, and meatball cheeks. His head was pear-shaped. His dark-brown uniform was made of wool with lace sticking out from both shoulders. There were medals pinned on his breast. Carrying a sword, he stood in the middle of the town square. Behind him stood a squad of his soldiers.
Pearl and I walked toward Bumpkin Emperor. Pearl carried a bucket of ink. For the first time, she was without her knitted black hat. Under the bright sun her curly golden hair shone like autumn leaves.
No one paid attention to Pearl at first. All eyes were on Bumpkin Emperor. Carpenter Chan and Lilac were tied with their hands behind their backs. Bumpkin Emperor announced Carpenter Chan’s beheading.
The executioner was called to choose his ax.
Lilac fell to her knees. She crawled toward her lover.
The crowd begged Bumpkin Emperor.
Papa and NaiNai prayed for God’s mercy.
The soldiers drove the crowd back.
In my ear, Pearl whispered, “Now!”
Raising the bucket, she poured the black ink water over her head.
“Angry spirit!” I shouted.
Pearl pretended to be possessed by evil as she ran toward Bumpkin Emperor with ink dripping from her face.
The crowd gasped. “Angry spirits!”
“Black blood!”
Pearl landed in front of Bumpkin Emperor. She waved her arms and kicked her legs, knotting herself into a ball, and groaned as if being tortured by invisible spirits.
“What is this?” Bumpkin Emperor asked loudly. “Who are you?”
Kicking her feet, Pearl uttered a string of words no one understood.
“Speak! Who are you?” Bumpkin was visibly nervous.
NaiNai turned to Bumpkin Emperor and said, “You must have done something to offend the gods.”
The warlord got down on his knees in front of Pearl. “Can I help you, whoever’s spirit you are?” He tried to steady his shaky voice.
“I must speak to the one who is in charge,” Pearl murmured in a husky voice, her eyes tightly shut. “I must speak to the general himself.”
“I am the general,” Bumpkin Emperor rose.
Pearl began to speak English.
“What, what is she rumbling about?” Bumpkin Emperor became tense. “Which god are you representing? Is she talking to me?”
“Yes.” I told the warlord that I could be his translator.
“What is she saying?” Bumpkin Emperor turned to me.
“She said, ‘The fire is at your door.’”
“Fire at my door? What does that mean?”
“In the name of the Holy Spirit…” Pearl continued.
“Holy Spirit?” Bumpkin Emperor was confused. “Mother of a mule, I don’t understand!”
“Would you like me to stop?” I asked.
“Of course not,” he said. “Carry on, dammit!”
“Well, she is not making sense.”
“Do the best you can to make her words into sense!”
I began acting, bending down to get close to Pearl. “Yes, I heard you… Went out to him? All the country of Judah? Wait a minute.” I turned to the warlord. “She said, ‘All the people of Jerusalem are going toward the river to confess their sins…’”
Confused, Bumpkin Emperor cried, “Which god is this?”
I shook my head.
“A powerful God,” Papa said, raising his arm to point at the sky. “Perhaps the true God.”
“What is his name? Tell me, please!” Bumpkin Emperor begged.
“Angel,” Pearl uttered.
“His name is Angel,” I translated.
“I have never heard of such a god,” Bumpkin Emperor responded. “Is he new?”
“He is ancient,” Pearl continued. “He’s been here since the beginning of time. Only the wise can hear him. He is mad at you.”
“What… what does he want from me?” Bumpkin Emperor’s voice grew weak.
Pearl went silent.
“The God no longer wants to speak to you,” I translated. “The God is leaving.”
“Please! Don’t go!” Bumpkin Emperor was scared. “Ask what business he had here! If he is a foreign god, who is his patron in China?”
“I was invited by the Dowager Empress of your country,” Pearl began to speak in Chinese. “I was escorted here by the Imperial Minister-in-Chief Mr. Li Hung chang…”
Before Pearl ended her sentence, Bumpkin Emperor fell down and kowtowed, hitting his forehead on the ground. “Your Majesty, I mean no offense! I… I deserve to die three thousand times! Please, forgive me!”
Again, Pearl closed her eyes.
“Please don’t leave! Grant me a chance,” Bumpkin Emperor begged. “Your Majesty, I am asking for a last chance!”
“Release Carpenter Chan and his lady,” Pearl spoke with an imperial tone. “And leave Chin-kiang right away.”
“Yes, Your Majesty, I shall depart instantly.”
“Well, let us have no doubt that God sent Pearl to save you,” Absalom said to Carpenter Chan and Lilac. “My daughter is no angel, but she is a good Christian.”
Later, Pearl told me that she didn’t like what her father said, although she was happy that the trick worked.
“I am sure your father loves you,” I comforted my friend.
Pearl shook her head. “To tell you the truth, I am jealous of those whom he baptizes. He offers affection to strangers, to you, NaiNai, your papa, Carpenter Chan, Lilac, and almost everyone in the town. He will never spare affection for his own children. He is always cold with me.”
“Absalom loves you, Pearl.”
“I don’t feel it. My mother doesn’t feel his love either. Absalom shuts himself in the study so that he can be with God without any distraction!”
“Your father is proud of you, or he wouldn’t say that you were a good Christian.”
“Absalom cares about Chinese people so much that he’s willing to risk his life for them. In the meantime, he believes that they are heathens and he is their superior. He lives to convert people. He even wants a chance with the warlords.”
“Absalom wants to convert Bumpkin Emperor, General Lobster, and General Crab?” I laughed.
“Yes, and their fish wives, shrimp siblings, and snail concubines.”
“That’s impossible!”
“Oh, yes, God works miracles, hah, hah, hah!”
“Papa will believe whoever saves his ass.”
“My father is a nut and your father is a crook.”
We laughed and put our fathers out of our minds.
We walked to the outskirts of town, where someone was getting married. We joined the children who had been invited to the wedding to help inspire fertility. We were given nuts and seeds to throw at the new couple. The groom was a young peasant who was already drunk. He meant to thank the guests but instead he threw up. The bride was dressed in a bright-red embroidered costume. Her face was covered with a piece of silk. Pearl and I admired the costume and the bride’s glittering hair ornament. When the band started the wedding song, we joined in.
Buddha sits on a lotus pad,
Beautiful fingers orchidlike.
Sun goes down and moon comes up,
May your life be peaceful and tranquil.
Mud walls and straw pillows,
Fruits, seeds, and many sons.