She lay back on her pillows, her eyes closed. Mrs Armistead picking up the letter, took the opportunity to read it.
She understood. The moment had come.
‘Madam has had bad news?’ she asked soothingly.
Perdita nodded vaguely.
‘I will make you some chocolate.’
‘Chocolate!’ cried Perdita bitterly.
‘Then, Madam, a dish of tea.’
‘Leave me, Armistead. Leave me alone.’
Mrs Armistead quietly shut the door, leaving Perdita to her misery.
The Prince she guessed was on his way to Windsor. Soon now, if it were coming at all, the summons would come.
She went to her room – bare of all her private possessions. The beautiful gowns which Perdita had given her were all safely stored in Chertsey.
All day long Perdita stayed in her room, wanting nothing but to be left alone with her misery.
What a fool she is, thought Mrs Armistead. She will ruin her looks with weeping – and there is Lord Maiden, and a host of others who will cherish her. She could discover that it is not such a bad thing to have been the mistress of the Prince of Wales.
Mrs Armistead looked at her own reflection in the mirror and smiled secretly.
There was an air of waiting about the house in Cork Street. The servants knew. Perhaps, like Mrs Armistead, they had seen it coming; they knew how infrequent were the Prince’s visits, they had heard his voice and that of their mistress raised in anger against each other. Doubtless, thought Mrs Armistead, they imitated those in higher circles and wagered how long it would last. They would know that their mistress had shut herself in her room and that she refused to eat or see anyone.
Mrs Armistead stayed close to the window. Every time she heard carriage wheels she was intent.
And at length a carriage stopped at the door of the house and glancing out of the window she saw Mr Meynel step from it.
She was at the door and herself let him in.
‘The time has come, Madam,’ said Mr Meynel.
‘Now … this minute?’ she asked and her serenity amazed Mr Meynel.
‘The carriage is waiting, Madam. We should leave in ten minutes. It’s a long journey to Windsor.’
‘Pray go to the carriage, Mr Meynel, and wait for me there. I will be with you in ten minutes.’
Mr Meynel bowed his head. He could see that she was a woman of her word.
Mrs Armistead scratched lightly on the door. Perdita did not answer, so she opened it and looked in. Perdita lay in her bed, her lovely hair in wild disorder, her face devoid of rouge, powder and patches looking strangely childlike. She did not glance at Mrs Armistead, but stared before her as though she were in a dream.
‘Mrs Robinson, Madam.’
Perdita shook her head. Her lips framed the words Go away, but no sound came from them.
‘It distresses me to disturb you with my affairs at such a time, Madam, but I have to leave.’
Perdita did not speak.
Very well, thought Mrs Armistead, if she did not wish to hear there was no need to force an explanation upon her. She had done her duty. She had told her that she was leaving. This was an easy way out.
Mrs Armistead shut the door and, putting on her cloak, quietly left the house.
The following day Perdita roused herself and saw ruin staring her in the face. The Prince had deserted her; he no longer wished to see her. She picked up the note he had written and read it again and again.
The fashionable world would know by now: Perdita’s day is over. Now he would be flaunting that woman – riding with her, dancing with her in Cumberland House and even perhaps at his own birthday ball.
He was at Windsor now. And he would not be thinking of her; but would he not? He had cared for her so deeply and that was not so long ago.
She had done everything to please him. Where had she failed? When she thought of what she had spent in this house to entertain him in the manner to which he was accustomed …!
Oh God, she thought, bills! Those outstanding accounts which she had thrust away so impatiently because there had been no time to consider the cost. All her energies had had to go into keeping her Prince happy. There had been no time for anything else. But when the dressmakers, the wine merchants, the butchers, the pastrycooks … when they all knew that the Prince had deserted her, they would lose their patience.
She was a frightened woman.
She got up from her bed. She could not allow him to treat her like this. Where was her confidence? She thought of how, not so long ago, she had been able to change his mood from one of peevish dissatisfaction to one of adoring contentment.
She was being foolish. All she had to do was see him, to tell him she adored him, that she could not live without him. That was all he needed. After all he was such a boy, a spoilt boy. Of course he was a spoilt boy. There were so many people around him showing him how important he was. Would he not one day be King?
Then she must see him. But he was at Windsor. Well, what was to prevent her going to Windsor?
She felt better now that she had decided on some action.
She leaped off her bed, looked at herself in the mirror and gasping with horror covered her face with her hands. What a fool she was! What if he had repented and called and seen her like this? The damage must be repaired without delay; and she would go to Windsor. She would take Armistead with her and it would be rather like the old days on Eel Pie Island.
She pulled the bell rope for Armistead and went to her wardrobe. Now what should she wear? A becoming gown and a cloak in a contrasting colour. Her hair dressed simply as he had liked it best, perhaps with a curl over the shoulder.
Why did Armistead not answer her summons? It was unlike Armistead.
She frowned and brought a blue silk dress from her wardrobe. She was feeling better already. Once Armistead had done her work she would have transformed this pale and sad creature into the most beautiful woman in London.
Hurry Armistead! What has happened to you.
It was five minutes since she had rung.
She opened her door and called: ‘Armistead.’
She went along to Armistead’s room. The footman was on the stairs. He looked flushed and it occurred to her later that he must have been at the wine.
‘Where is Armistead?’ she asked.
‘She left, Madam. Yesterday.’
‘Left!’
‘Yes, Madam. She went away. She said she was leaving and had told you.’
‘Leaving … But …’
The footman shrugged his shoulders … insolently, she thought. What had happened? Armistead … gone!
Then she remembered that the woman had come to her yesterday and said something. What had she said? She, Perdita, had been too unhappy with her own affairs to listen to Armistead’s account of hers.
The footman was watching her covertly. Of course he was seeing her as he never had before … unkempt, carelessly dressed, her face unpainted.
He knows, she thought. He will tell the servants that the Prince has deserted me.
So she must see her lover. She must go to Windsor without delay.
She went back to her room. It was mid-afternoon. Why had she not realized before what she must do. If it had been morning she could have reached Windsor in daylight.
But first she must make herself beautiful. Oh, how she missed Armistead! And where had Armistead gone? Some family matter … was that what she had said? Why hadn’t she listened? Why hadn’t she insisted on retaining Armistead’s services at all costs?