Plague

Dr. Petrie kissed her. 'You'd better go now,' he said gently. 'Mr. Garunisch is a fast smoker.'

Esmeralda cuddled him close, and pressed her lips against his side.

Kenneth Garunisch, in blue-striped pyjamas, put his head around the door and said, 'Hey, you two. Don't hurry on my account. I'm just going to finish this chapter.'

He was wakened by the sound of a helicopter. He sat up, listening. Esmeralda had long since gone, and Kenneth Garunisch was lying next to him with his face buried in the pillow, snoring. The helicopter noise came and went, as if it was circling around somewhere in the vicinity. He climbed out of bed, tugged on his pants, and went to the window.

At first, he couldn't see where it was. The noise of the rotors was bounced off buildings in all directions, and the sky was gray with cloud. But then he saw it turning around the 38-storey United Nations Plaza building, and circling towards Concorde Tower with its blades flickering and its navigation lights shining through the murk.

Kenneth Garunisch sat up, rubbing his eyes. 'What's going on?' he grunted.

'It's a helicopter.' said Dr. Petrie. 'It's been circling around here for a couple of minutes. Maybe it's the cavalry.'

Garunisch swung his legs out of bed and came to take a look. 'Some hopes,' he said. 'They've probably just come for a snoop at the doomed survivors.'

'Do you think we ought to wave?' said Dr. Petrie. 'There's always a chance they're looking for people to rescue.'

'Do what you like,' said Garunisch.

The helicopter was really close to the tower now, circling slowly around and shining a powerful light in their direction. It was a small two-seater Bell, with a perspex bubble cockpit. Dr. Petrie waved both hands.

At that moment, Herbert Gaines pushed into the room, hastily tying his Japanese bathrobe around his waist.

'Is that a helicopter?' he asked.

'It ain't a June bug,' said Kenneth Garunisch.

'They've come!' said Gaines. 'They said they'd come, and they have!'

Adelaide came into the room and took Dr. Petrie's arm. 'Leonard — what is it?'

Herbert Gaines was elated. 'It's the people from Washington! They called me on Saturday when the first news of the plague leaked out. They said they'd bring in a helicopter to rescue me! And here they are!'

'Well,' said Dr. Petrie, looking at Kenneth Garunisch. 'It looks like politics pay and principles poop out.'

Garunisch shrugged.

Herbert Gaines went to the window and flapped his arms about frantically. For a while it didn't look as if the helicopter pilot had seen him, but then the dazzling searchlight probed into the apartment window, and Herbert Gaines was lit up like an actor on a stage. 'I'm here!' he shrieked. 'I'm here! I'm here!'

They saw the helicopter pilot pointing towards the roof, and then the machine turned a half-circle and rose out of sight. Herbert Gaines, whimpering with excitement, rushed into the sitting-room and pulled on his yellow safari suit. The rest of them watched him in tense silence.

'Well,' said Herbert, lacing his shoes, 'I think I'm ready to go!'

Nicholas, scruffy from sleep and wearing nothing but a dark brown bath-towel, said, 'Is that it? You're just going?'

Gaines stopped lacing his shoe and looked up. Then he cast his eyes around at everybody else, and saw their expressionless, unsympathetic faces, and bit his lip.

'Well… yes. I mean, yes!'

'What about me?' said Nicholas. 'You're just leaving me here? And what about all these other people?'

Herbert Gaines lowered his eyes. 'Nicky,' he said, 'the helicopter only has room for one. You saw that it's a two-seater. I can't take anybody with me.'

Garunisch coughed. 'Couldn't we draw lots?' he said gruffly. 'Or maybe one of the ladies should go instead?'

'Listen,' said Gaines, almost desperate, 'it's up there now! It's waiting! It won't wait for ever!'

Garunisch examined the floor. 'You're an old man, Mr. Gaines,' he said harshly. 'You're an old man and you've had a long life. Now, supposing one of these young ladies went instead of you. Or what about Nicholas here? He's a good friend of yours. Don't you think enough of Nicholas to give up your place in that chopper, and let him live?'

Herbert Gaines stood up.

'They sent the helicopter for me,' he insisted. 'The only reason it's here is because of me. The party needs me, and that's why they've taken the risk. What do you think they're going to say if that thing flies all the way back to Washington with Nicky aboard? Do you think they've spent all that money, and wasted all that energy, just to educate a half-educated faggot who can't even cook?'

Nicholas stared open-mouthed at Herbert as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

Garunisch grunted. 'It that's how you feel, Mr. Gaines, perhaps you'd better just get the hell out. I don't think any of the rest of us would like to stand in the way of your cowardice, seeing as how it's so pressing.'

Gaines said, 'Look — as soon as I get to Washington — I'll make sure they send another helicopter back — a bigger one — for all of you — '

Garunisch flapped a hand at him. 'Don't bother. You might strain your brain trying to remember to do it, and we'd hate to see that happen.' Adelaide said, 'Mr. Gaines?'

Herbert Gaines was buttoning up his safari suit and making for the door. 'Yes?' he said.

Adelaide didn't answer at once. Not until Herbert Gaines had turned around and looked at her. 'I saw your movie once, Mr. Gaines.'

Herbert Gaines' mouth twitched. 'My dear, the helicopter's waiting — I really can't — '

Adelaide said, 'I like the line when Hannah Carson says to Captain Dashfoot: "Oh, you brave, brave, honorable man, would the world were all like you."'

Gaines paused. In a quiet voice he said, 'My dear, you've got a regrettably good memory.'

He stood at the door, his hand on the latch, so obviously striking a tragic theatrical pose that Nicholas said, 'For Christ's sake, Herbert, just fuck off.'

Herbert Gaines lifted his lion-like head. 'I will send more helicopters,' he said, in his richest voice. 'I promise you that upon my life.' He opened the door.

He was so involved in his melodramatic pose that when the rats rushed at him, their heavy bodies thumping against the half-open door, he was taken completely by surprise. The rats leaped and jumped at him, and more of them scuttled into the apartment and disappeared under the makeshift beds and into the drapes. Dr. Petrie ran across the sitting-room and banged himself against the door so that it slammed shut. He crunched four or five rats in the door-jamb, and they squealed and writhed, with blood running out of their narrow noses. Adelaide and Esmeralda and Mrs. Garunisch, panting with fright, picked up cushions and brooms and chased after the rats that had managed to get into the apartment.

Herbert Gaines had a rat swinging from his sleeve. He flapped at it uselessly until Kenneth Garunisch picked up a heavy cigarette lighter from the table and knocked the rat away. Then he stepped on its head and killed it.

'Oh, Mother of God,' gasped Gaines. 'Oh, Mother of God!'

'Well, darling,' said Nicholas, turning to Herbert Gaines. 'So much for your helicopter now.'

Herbert Gaines was shaking. 'I'm still going!' he said. 'Don't think that a few rats can stop me!'

'A few?' said Dr. Petrie. 'Did you see how many there were? The whole building must be thick with them!'

Herbert Gaines said, 'It won't wait, you know! The helicopter won't wait!'

Kenneth Garunisch was helping his wife to corner the last stray rat and beat it to death. He came over to Herbert Gaines with blood on his hands. Behind him, Mrs. Garunisch had suddenly gone into a burst of hysterical weeping, and Esmeralda was trying to soothe her.