He and the others had been packing their personal things that morning when Justin had noticed that Teresa, while hovering about at hand, wasn’t making the least effort to join them.
“You should get packed,” he’d said.
“I ain’t goin’,” she’d said, and there it was, a nice big haymaker in the belly. Ooof!
“What?” said Justin, when she made no word of explanation. “You’re not going with us? But why not?”
“Why should I?” she shrugged, a deadly spark in her lovely eyes. “Ain’t nothin’ out there they ain’t got here. An’ I don’ wanna die on the road like some hopper under a truck. Or get shot by some banger for my food. Besides, ya know what they got here, Case? A school! A real, no-shit school, like Before! I gonna learn ta read an’ write and arthimajig and all that ploop!”
Crestfallen as could be, Justin did his best to shrug it off and seem unconcerned, but it wasn’t at all easy. What was more, he could feel the eyes of the others on him, judging his reaction. With a frown, he turned to them.
“Could we have some privacy, please?” he asked, hearing the tightness in his voice. “Just for a moment.”
The others all nodded gravely and, leaving their belongings, shuffled out into the hallway. Justin closed the door after them and then, fighting a hot lump in his throat, turned to Teresa, who stood with her arms crossed and a serious look on her face. He thought for a second about the various surveillance devices in the room and about who might be watching—and why—but thought to himself, to hell with it-let ‘em watch.
“Please, you have to reconsider,” he told Teresa, trying not to sound too desperate. “We need your help!”
“I don’ have to do nothin’ Case,” she said sullenly. “Don’cha know that by now? ‘Sides, you don’ really need my help. You gonna have that car, all that gear, plus that Cornell dude, who one ripper maximum in a fight, believe it. Naw, you be OK without me.”
“But,” said Justin, a pit-like feeling in his stomach. “What about California? Don’t you want to live somewhere decent? Without all the bangers and survies?”
“Meh,” she shrugged. “I ain’t so sure they is such a place. An’ even if they is, it can’t be that hot ploop, like they say. Nowhere is. And anyway, this here place is the safest I ever seen. You can sleep at night, they gots that kick-shit runnin’ water, you don’ hafta crap outdoors. They got food, water, smoke, a whole crew watchin’ yer back, everything you need, hey? Plus, like I say, a real got-dammit school! Now, far as I can see, this is good as it gonna get. I be total doopy to leave.”
He had to admit that, vernacular aside, she made a lot of good points, but his sinking heart wouldn’t let him give up so easily.
“Then what about my mission?” he asked. “Don’t you want to help me to save all those lives? To save the human race?”
“Eh, I ain’t so sure ‘bout that, neither,” she said dismissively. “I mean, we ain’t dead, is we? An’ we been aroun’ folks with the Sick. So what up with that? Way I hear it, if I ain’t caught the Sick by now, I ain’t gonna. An’ that’s same for all people. We like, what-you-call-it—immune. Anyway, s’what I heard.”
“But that’s only partly true!” Justin protested. “This virus is different. It mutates! It changes, becomes a new strain, and then goes right on infecting people. It is true that you and I and probably everyone here at the House is immune, but that’s only to the present strain. And once it has a chance to mutate, it will return. Do you understand? If we don’t find an antivirus, it’s only a matter of time.” He paused as she paced back and forth a little. Then a thought occurred: “May I ask, who exactly you heard that from? That we are all immune?”
She stopped and shrugged. “Howie,” she said. “He know all kinda ploop, hey?”
Justin sighed raggedly, scrubbing his face with one hand. “Mr. Lampert,” he spat, like a curse. “Of course.” He looked back to her. “Teresa, look,” he said, trying for his best, authoritative tones, “Mr. Lampert is not an epidemiologist. He’s not a doctor, of any kind. He’s not even a scientist. He was a car salesman Before! And now? Well, now he’s a bitter, cynical old man. I know that you like him and that he can be very persuasive, but he doesn’t know what he’s talking about! This virus will mutate and it will return. Until everyone is dead. Understand? Everyone.”
She looked sort of frightened, just for a moment, her eyes wide and mouth slightly ajar, but then the accustomed hardness came back to her beautiful eyes and she shook her head.
“It don’ matter, Case,” she said. “I a’ready made up my mind. I’m stayin’.”
Down to his last argument, Justin slumped and then, desperately fearful of how she was going to respond, played the last card in his hand.
“What about us?” he said softly. “What about what we’ve shared? Does that mean nothing to you? You won’t miss me?”
“Sure I miss ya,” she said levelly. “An’ ‘specially at night. But I don’ know ‘bout the two of us, as in a couple, know what I say? I mean, you a big-shot whitecoat. You gots this big mission you on, an’ like, people to save and all. You an important man, hey? An’ me? I just another banger girl, jus’ like all the others. I prob’ly be better off with someone like me, hey?”
Justin sighed again, the pit in his stomach widening into a chasm. Again, he had to admit that she made a good point; they were very different people and if they hadn’t been thrown together by circumstance, probably would never have even crossed paths. In a time of peace and normality—say, Before—they would have gotten along like oil and water. Nonetheless, the very thought of losing her, of never seeing her again, hit him so hard that he almost broke into tears. With great effort, he fought down the urge, but Teresa could obviously sense his pain.
“Aw, it ain’t so bad, Case,” she said, in about the sweetest tones he’d ever heard from her. “You gonna go on you mission, gonna save the humanity race and all, and I gonna learn to read an’ write an’ all that good groop. And who know, hey? If you make it to Cali an’ save ever’body, mebbe you can come back! ‘Course, I might move on some day, but like I say, who know what could happen?”
Justin groaned. “Yes, there’s always that possibility,” he said bleakly, his chest tight and his eyes hot with repressed tears. “However remote.” He looked at her closely and she stared back. “I will miss you, Teresa. You may have assaulted me and kidnapped me and dragged me from the only world I’ve ever known, but you also saved my life. And for that, I owe you my thanks. As for the rest, well, I feel that I have to tell you that you are the most beautiful woman I have ever known. You are smart, funny, capable, tough, and well, just simply amazing. I don’t know how exactly I’m going to deal with being away from you, but you’re right. I have my mission. And that’s all that really matters.”
They were quiet for a moment. Teresa, blushing slightly, shuffled her boot-clad feet and then, nearly melting his heart, looked up at him coquettishly and batted her eyes.
“Ya wanna do it?” she breathed. “Like, one more time ‘fore ya go?”
Suddenly every fiber of his body wanted to take her in his arms, to kiss her and touch her and be with her in every sense, but it was only a fleeting, animal impulse, and he mastered it and shook his head.
“No, Teresa,” he said, managing a wan smile. “That would just cheapen it. Let’s just leave things as they are. Besides, we really need to get going.”