"The courageous Petrucchio?"
"Chino!" said Lecchio.
"Shhh," said Chino, again admonishing his companion to silence.
"Yes," said Petrucchio.
"The glorious and clever Petrucchio?"
"Yes," said Petrucchio.
"He of Turia?" inquired Chino.
` "Yes," said Petrucchio. "Quake, of you must. Quail, if you would rather."
"Surely you have heard of this fellow, Lecchio," said Chino to his companion.
"No," admitted Lecchio, which response brought a swift kick in the shins. "Yes, yes!" cried Lecchio. "Of course, the great Petrucchio!"
"Ws it not he who single-handedly carved broad swaths thought the legion of ten cities in the seven meadows of Saleria?" asked Chino of Lecchio.
"I see that my reputation has preceded me," said Petrucchio, twirling his mustache.
"And lifted the sieges of eleven cities?"
"Maybe," said Lecchio.
"And breached the gates of fifteen?"
"Maybe," said Lecchio.
"And alone stormed the ramparts of twenty cities, reducing them to rubble?" asked Chino.
"I think so," said Lecchio, uncertainly.
"And when set upon by ten thousand Tuchuks in their own country routed them all?"
"Eleven thousand," said Petrucchio.
"Yes," cried Lecchio. "It was he!"
"None other," said Petrucchio.
"What bring you to these lands, noble captain?" inquired Chino. "Is it your intention to bring them to devastation, perhaps for some fancied slight to your honor?"
"No, no," said Petrucchio, modestly.
"Is it then the sacking of a few cities you are up to?"
"No," admitted Petrucchio.
"Not even the defeating of a small army?"
"No," he said.
"Not even the burning of a few fields, the seizure of a piddling harvest or two?
"No," said Petrucchio.
"What then, possibly, could you be doing here?" inquired Chino.
"I am, as you may have by now surmised, Petrucchio," said Petrucchio, "a captain of Turia, and have here," and her he indicated the women behind him, "under my protection, for which services I have taken fee, three noble ladies, each of gentle birth and high station."
"They are, then, all free women?" asked Chino.
"Of course!" responded Petrucchio, somewhat huffily, seemingly prepared, at the drop of an innuendo, to take umbrage, with all the fearsome consequences which that might entail for a hapless offender.
"How fortunate they are to be under the care of one so skilled and courageous, as well as wise," said Chino, adding, seemingly 'sotto voice', to Lecchio, "or so it would seem."
"What, ho!" cried Petrucchio. "What means this, 'or so it would seem'?"
"His hearing," said Chino to Lecchio, who was sticking his finger in his ear and shaking his head, as though to restore his sense of hearing after having been partially deafened, "is more acute than that of the prowling sleen!" Then he said to Petrucchio, "Oh, it is nothing, I suppose."
"And what, good sir," demanded Petrucchio, "might be the meaning of this guarded 'I suppose'?"
"Why, it, too, is nothing," said Chino, adding, "-I suppose."
"Do you doubt my capacity to defend these damsels to the death, against even armies?" asked Petrucchio.
"Not at all," said Chino, hastily. "I was merely wondering if such extreme exertions on their behalf might, under the possible circumstances, be fully justified."
"I do not take your meaning, sir," said Petrucchio, warily.
"They are, of course, free women," said Chino, reassuring himself of the point.
"Of course," said Petrucchio.
"Then my fears are groundless," said Chino, relieved.
"What fears?" asked Petrucchio.
"From what rich, high city might you be coming?" he asked, as though it mattered naught, but, obviously, secretly, as though it might matter a great deal.
"Why from the high towers of Pseudopolis," said Petrucchio.
There is no such city or town, of course. It was invented for the purposes of the play. Too, there is no really good translation into English for the town. Similar English inventions might be such things as «Phonyville» or "Bamboozleberg."
"It is as I feared," groaned Chino, supposedly merely to Lecchio.
"It is?" asked Lecchio.
"Yes," said Chino, dismally.
"Here, here," called Petrucchio. "What is going on there?"
"No," said Chino, firmly. "It is impossible. The very thought is absurd."
"What are you talking about?" pressed Petrucchio.
"It is nothing, Captain," said Chino. "Though, to be sure, if it were not for my confidence in your acuity and unerring judgment, I would suspect there might be cause for serious alarm."
"Speak clearly, fellow," demanded Petrucchio.
"You have, of course, been paid in advance for your troubles?" asked Chino.
"Of course," said Petrucchio.
"In authenticated gold, naturally," added Chino.
"Authenticated gold?" asked Petrucchio.
"Of course," said Chino. "If you have not had the coins authenticated, my friend, Lecchio, here, is certified by the caste of Builders to perform the relevant tests."
"We assure you, good sir," said one of the women, Rowena, "that our gold is good!"
"It might not hurt to check on the matter, I think," speculated Petrucchio, suspiciously, "especially as we have here at our disposal one qualified to conduct the assays."
"Unnecessary!" cried Rowena.
"Insulting!" cried Lady Telitsia.
"Absurd!" cried Bina.
"It seems they are not eager for the coins to be tested," observed Chino, meaningfully, adding, "even though there would be no charge for the service. I wonder why?"
"No charge, you say?" asked Petrucchio.
"Not between friends, such as we," said Chino.
"By all means, then," cried Petrucchio, and, with difficulty, he sheathed his great sword, and drew three pieces of gold-colored metal from his wallet, stage coins, handing them to Lecchio.
Lecchio held the coins up, one by one, holding up also, behind them, one or two fingers, as though he would see if he could peer through them.
"How are they?" asked Chino.
"So far, they seem good," Lecchio muttered, "but many forgeries pass the first test." He then drew from his pack a glass of the Builders, used for identifying distant objects. "Oh, oh," he muttered, darkly.
"What is it?" asked Petrucchio, eagerly.
"It is too early to tell," said Lecchio, replacing the glass of the Builders in his pack. "I must be sure."
"Surely things are all right," said Chino, optimistically.
"Doubtless," said Lecchio. "Doubtless." But he seemed a bit uncertain about it.
In a moment now he was clinking the coins carefully together. He listened to these small sounds intently, professionally. Then he spit on each coin and, with his index finger, carefully rubbed the moisture into small, exact circles, observing their appearance. He then lifted his index finger up, his eyes closed, holding it first turned to the wind, and then away from the wind, and then, his eyes opened, repeated the test, studying his finger intently. He then commenced his final doubtless decisive round of tests. He bit into one of the coins. then he drew forth from his pack a small vial filled with white crystals which he sprinkled on the coins. "What is that?" asked Petrucchio. "They are best with salt," said Lecchio. He then repeated the test, and bit each of the coins carefully, thoughtfully, expertly, not hurrying, as a connoisseur might sample varieties of Bazi tea or fine wines.
"Yes, yes?" asked Chino.
Lecchio's face was drawn and grim.
"Yes, yes!" pressed Petrucchio.
"False," announced Lecchio, grimly.
"No!" cried Rowena.
"What is the meaning of this?" said Petrucchio to the women, sternly.
Lecchio dropped the coins into his wallet.
"If there should be anything wrong with the coins," said Rowena, "I assure you we have no knowledge of it. Further, if anything, in spite of our intentions and care in these matters, should prove to be truly amiss, perhaps because of some oversight or subtle inadvertence, have no fear but what it will be promptly corrected."