"After he came, we just laid there on the bed, kissing each other on the mouth, playing with each other's pricks. When we both got all hot and hard again, I turned around facing Ray, and we sucked each other off. It was beautiful the way we just seemed to sense what the other wanted, and we came in each other's mouth at exactly the same time.
"I hated to leave Shad, but I guess I'd kind of fallen in love with Ray, too. So when he begged me to go to Los Angeles and live with him, I did.
"Ray was awful good to me, and I didn't find out until almost a year later that he swung both ways. He made a lot of female friends in the TV business, and when he'‹d tell me that he had a date with one of them, I thought he was just putting on a front. I didn't know then how many of the TV and movie people are either homos or lesbians, or go both ways, like Ray. But I went to a movie one night, and when I came home, there was Ray in bed with this girl.
"That was my first three-way deal with a girl in it. I had had some orgies in San Francisco, but it was always with a bunch of guys.
"It wasn't bad 'at all, because this girl I think her name was Ann went the whole route. She fucked, sucked, and let Ray and I fuck her in the ass. I got kind of hooked on her, and Ray seemed kind of pleased, because he brought her home a lot after that. Later on, another couple and a guy used to come over often, and we'd really have a ball.
"I lived with Ray until I was seventeen, and in a way, we loved each other. But it began to wear thin, and I liked to do it both ways with women as well as guys more and more. I actually liked fucking a cunt a lot more than I thought I would. And when I started going with this one girl pretty steady, Ray and I had a big, nasty fight, and he tossed me out. I didn't have any money and the only thing I could do was to move in with this girl.
"She didn't have much dough, either. She was trying to get into movies or TV and was working as a cocktail waitress in some club. I looked about nineteen, but Terri was scared to take a chance of me going to the club, although I drank pretty good at home. She was twenty-five, and she used to be good to me and bring home all her tips and her salary. But she had to go out days and make the rounds of the casting offices and a few casting couches, I guess and she had to dress real nice, so there wasn't much money.
"I'd made a lot of contacts through Ray, so I began to pick up on some of the homos that I knew had a little money. I began to sell it. I have never met a man I ever fell in love with, other than Ray, so I used to just come right out and tell a guy who was making a pass that it would cost him.
"Then Terri began to get a little nasty. She didn't like me being a prostitute. Besides, I was keeping all the dough for myself. I wanted to get a place of my own, where I wouldn't feel tied down. I told her that was how it was going to be if I wanted to go out, to suck or fuck, for money or for the hell of it she had nothing to say about it.
"She begged me to give up homo activities. She said she couldn't understand me, because she was young, beautiful, and that whatever a 'queer' could offer, she could always go him one better she had a mouth, an asshole, and a cunt. That was another thing that used to get me mad she always used the word 'queer.’
"I screwed her a lot, but it wasn't enough for her. I suppose she was getting some on the side, but it didn't matter to me, as long as she left me alone. We began to fight pretty good, and I couldn't make her understand that I wasn't having 'affairs’ as she called them, with guys. I was just sucking them off and letting them ass-fuck me for money!
"Anyhow, we both started to drink pretty good. And one night, she brought this guy home with her some goddamned pantywaist that was married, and who had conned her into believing he could get her some TV roles. I was pissed off that she'd go that far, but that wasn't the half of it! She'd told this sonofa-bitch that we'd have a three-way deal! That I'd suck his cock and let him ass-fuck me!
"That tore it. I beat the livin' shit out of her, and when he got into it, I kicked hell out of him, too. I put him in the hospital and the bastard had me arrested. He said in court that Terri had coaxed him to her place, and then set him up so I could blackmail him. It sounded pretty good to the judge, I guess, because Terri got ninety days in the county jail for prostitution and conspiracy, while they sent me to reform school because I was a juvenile.
"I stayed there for over three years until I was twenty-one. It wasn't too bad. I found the routine to do 'easy time' right away and I still got paid off for sucking cocks! Not in money, much, but in soft assignments, cigarettes, booze, free time you know and it wasn't too bad.
"When I got out, I needed dough. I contacted Ray and he fixed me up with a pad, and I went straight, flat-assed 'whore.' Ray got me a job in a TV station not much, but it was something, anyhow. Between working and sucking cocks, I lived pretty good."
So Jack, because of his early childhood and sexual experiences, became a piece of human driftwood at the young age of twenty-one.
He married and fathered a child, but it didn't work. He continued his homosexual and heterosexual activities without letup, seemingly unable to give up either sexual drive. Throughout his two year marriage, he continued to be a homosexual whore.
Now, at age twenty-six, he is in the second year of psychiatric therapy. He is slowly becoming aware of the reasons for his behavior, and reports indicate that he is well on the way to fulfilling his own needs for a normal and fruitful life.
Chapter 4
The Nymphette Pain Lover
Each of us has a degree of masochism in us. This can be easily proved by recalling what a good feeling it was when we were punished by our parents for something we thought we had gotten away with, but which had been giving us a "guilty conscience."
Another way for most adults to test whether or not they have masochistic tendencies, is to recall the chills and thrills of a sex partner biting the ear, scratching parts of the body with fingernails, and so on.
However, responding to mild stimuli of a physical nature does not make one a masochist, in the true sense of the word.
A masochist is a person who either requires physical or mental punishment to be aroused enough to indulge in sex, or who requires punishment to attain a climax or feel sexual fulfillment, or the extreme, where a person can attain sexual climax without intercourse by being physically whipped, beaten, burned or mutilated.
As mentioned, we all have latent masochistic tendencies, yet, psychiatrists maintain that "masochists are not born they are made."
The case of Ginny tends to bear their theory out.
Ginny came to our attention after participating in a bloody, gruesome "pain orgy." Subsequent sessions with psychologists brought out the grim facts which made Ginny a classic masochist.
She was admittedly and avidly a "pain-lover" and when asked by doctors if she had any idea why, her story unfolded:
"No, I guess I don't really know," Ginny began. "I guess there's always been violence in my life. My Dad and Mom were always fighting, and they never cared if I was there or not. And I mean fighting where blood showed, most of the time.
"I didn't have any brothers or sisters and I don't think my parents wanted me. I was a mistake or a slip or something. They never acted like they loved me. I was just something that had happened, and they had to take care of me like it or not. I remember lots of nights and even weekends, when they would go off and just leave me alone with nobody to watch out for me or nothing. But I got used to that and learned to take care of myself pretty good.
"I used to be fascinated by their fighting. Partly because I used to wonder why they stayed together, if they hated each other, and partly because I began to see that they deliberately hurt each other, and sometimes, I even thought that they liked it.