“I wouldn’t have thought you to be a beans and franks kind of guy,” he replied.
“Marilyn and I are really very low key. We are simply middle class kids who got very, very lucky.”
“And I can believe as much or as little of that as I want. So, what about the short list? Is there one?”
I shrugged elaborately. “Not that I can tell. Now, I don’t know what you’ve been hearing, but you probably know more of the candidates then I do. The way it was put to me was that if my answers to the questionnaire were okay, I would go on the short list, and then George Bush would interview us and make a choice.”
“That’s what I’ve heard, too.”
“Only nobody’s being interviewed or being called back. What would that suggest to you? Bush’s got between now and mid-July to make a pick.”
“More like Cheney’s got to make the pick. He’s the head of the nomination committee.”
“So again, what would that suggest to you?” The hot dogs were ready, so I pulled them out of the broiler and put them on buns. I set the pans of sauce and beans on hot mats and placed them on the island along with serving spoons. “Dig in.”
We loaded up our plates, and George took a couple bites of his hot dog. He smiled and said, “This is pretty good. What’s in it?”
I smiled back. “That’s Top Secret, burn-before-reading and all that. If I told you, Marilyn would kill both you and me.” I took another bite myself, and then said, “It’s sort of like chili, only without the beans and peppers.”
“It doesn’t have the heat of chili.”
I shook my head. “No, it doesn’t. Different mix of spices.”
“You were saying about Cheney?”
“Let me ask you a question. Who’s smarter, George Bush or Dick Cheney?”
That got me a snort of laughter. “George got a Gentleman’s C and thinks that’s the same thing as a real C.”
I nodded in wry agreement. “The smart one in that bunch is his brother Jeb.”
“So, Dick Cheney is smarter than George Bush. So what?”
“So, he’s a lot smarter. George has him running the selection process for his Vice President and also for his Cabinet. Who do you think is going to end up in these jobs? People owing their position to Bush or people owing Cheney?”
“Again, so what?”
“Okay, so what?” I paused a second and washed down some dinner with my beer. “So Dick is vetting all of us. What happens when he goes to George Bush and says that every one of us is fatally flawed and would be a complete disaster as a nominee. Every one of us would hurt the ticket. That nobody on the list can be used.”
“That’s pretty unlikely, Carl. There are some pretty qualified people on that list, and I’m not talking about you!” he replied.
“George, I’m still not sure why I’m there. The only thing I can think is that he wanted one Congressman to show he was being even handed or something, and he figured neither Hastert or DeLay would want the job. The question still stands, though. If none of us is qualified to be Vice President, who does that leave George Bush to choose?”
That caused Will’s eyebrows to raise. “Are you suggesting Dick Cheney is going to recommend Dick Cheney as the Vice Presidential nominee?”
I smiled. “George! I suggest nothing! We’re just two fellows having a light dinner and talking shop. If you were to ask around and find out I’m wrong, please, let me know.”
We finished our meal and I set the plates in the kitchen sink. “You said you had something for me?”
“It’s in my office.” I led him out through the dining room into the foyer, and then down to my office.
He stepped inside and said, “So this is the infamous clubhouse? I don’t think I’ve ever been in here before.”
“You heard about the name?” I said with a laugh.
“What, the He-Man Democrat Haters’ Club? I think we’re both dating ourselves, Carl, when we say we know where that came from.”
“Marilyn was never amused by that,” I admitted. I pointed him to an armchair and sat in a swivel chair near my desk. I reached into the desk and pulled out a manila envelope. “Here, take this. It’s a blank copy for you.”
“What is it?”
“Open it and find out.”
George shrugged and opened the flap, and pulled out a copy of the questionnaire I had been given. It took him several minutes to work his way through the various pages, and then he looked up at me. “All of you had to provide this information?” I nodded. He looked through it a second time. “About the only thing he didn’t ask was if you drank or used drugs.”
“Considering George Bush’s past history, that might not be a discussion they want to have.” George Will pursed his lips at that, but didn’t deny it. The Governor had already admitted to ‘youthful indiscretions’, including a drinking problem, and there were unanswered allegations of a heavy coke habit when he was younger.
“On the face of it, there is nothing here that a campaign wouldn’t want to know about a prospect,” he commented.
“That is very true,” I agreed. “Still, at the level they are asking? And here’s another couple of questions for you. First, has Dick Cheney had to fill this out? And who would do the vetting on him? And second, let’s say that somebody is being considered for a Cabinet office and Dick doesn’t want them there. What’s to keep him from leaking something from the files he has collected to the New York Times and killing it off? Would you trust him?”
“Like who?”
I shrugged. “Keating is on the short list, right?” George nodded. Frank Keating was the Governor of Oklahoma. “Former FBI agent, former assistant U.S. Attorney, former Associate Attorney General, good conservative credentials… sounds like a shoo-in for the Attorney General’s slot, right. I can tell you right now that Cheney doesn’t like him or want him. Wait until Cheney turns over his file on Keating to the press.”
“What about your file?”
I threw my hands up at that. “What in the world is less secret than my life? What could they possibly find on me that hasn’t already been used against me. Besides, no way do I have any kind of chance. I am much too moderate for the hard core Evangelicals that George and Karl Rove are courting. It’s more likely I’ll be burned in effigy than be elected to a national office.”
“So why tell me?”
Again I shrugged. “I just thought you’d be curious to see how the process was really working. You’re a curious guy, right?”
That didn’t get an answer, and after a few more minutes, he left with the envelope.
Things got interesting that Friday. George Will had apparently been following up on my information and his column detailed the influence Dick Cheney was having over George Bush. It detailed how Bush had turned over the entire Vice Presidential and Cabinet selection process to Cheney. It also stated that Cheney hadn’t been through his own vetting process, which he must have gotten from somebody else. It ended with an interesting conclusion.
An administration is more than simply who the President is; an administration is the people he chooses to implement his policies. To that extent then the forthcoming election would seem to be a contest between the winner of the Democratic primary, Al Gore, and the unelected winner of the Republican primary, Dick Cheney.
George Will might be a conservative and a Republican, but first and foremost he was a journalist and pundit. He must have known what a bomb he was igniting in the campaign. The Sunday morning talk shows were loaded with senior campaign operatives and consultants arguing that Governor Bush was in complete charge of the selection of the Vice Presidential nominee and the other cabinet members, and that there was actually a process in place to begin interviews. Notably absent from any discussions were either Bush or Cheney.