Chapter 110: 1991 In Our Nation’s Capital
I got a call from Marty on Monday afternoon, late. “I need to have my head examined, but I’m in. If you still want me, let me know. I haven’t given any notice yet.”
“What about your law firm, Dewey Cheatem and Howe? Is this going to screw up any partnership bids? How does that work, anyway?”
Marty snorted. “That’s part of it. I have been weighed in the balance and found wanting. I nosed around some this morning, and there won’t be a partnership offer made to me. At least, not under current circumstances. If I were to make the appropriate investment, they might reconsider.”
“Ouch!”
“Right, so I might as well consider my other options.”
I shrugged to myself. There are lots of reasons not to make somebody a partner, and job performance wasn’t the only factor. Maybe Marty simply pissed off a senior partner. “Come over on Wednesday and we’ll talk some more.” We hung up on that.
I talked to Marty on Wednesday and we confirmed he would come to work as my Chief of Staff. Thursday morning I called Sherry, Babs, and Mindy into my office and gave them the word. They sat there and nodded in understanding, but I felt an undercurrent of relief. They were getting somebody to sort things out. Marty would start soon, not the next Monday, but the Monday after that. They would pass it along to everyone.
When Marty joined up, you could see everybody settling into a new scheme of things. The entire office tightened up some, in that there was actually a method to the madness, and some needed discipline. Marty would have a meeting every morning, with me, him, and the three top ladies, and we would plan out the day and review what needed to be done. At least once a week he met with Babs and the Constituent Support people, and also with Sherry and the Legislative Support people. He also made a schedule to visit the District Office in Westminster on a regular basis. Even my own schedule began tightening up, as I began to meet with people I needed to see, and not just people who wanted to buy my soul.
After a few weeks, as things began to work together much more smoothly, I made a comment at our morning meeting that, “I think this new arrangement is going to work out.”
Marty laughed dryly. “That just means it’s all going to fall apart by lunchtime.”
He was right, of course. By the beginning of April I found myself called on the carpet by Newt Gingrich. He had discovered, horror of horrors, that I was interested in co-sponsoring Al Gore’s Internet bill. I was ‘asked’ to meet with him in his office. It was a lot like being called into the Principal’s office. He sat behind his big desk and I sat in a chair in front of him. “Carl, I understand you are interested in co-sponsoring HR656.”
“Yes, that’s correct,” I replied. I didn’t want to elaborate unless I had to. Newt Gingrich had the moral instincts of a shark looking for a wounded guppy. There was a reason he was the Minority Whip.
“I’m curious why you would do that. That’s Al Gore’s computer bill, isn’t it?”
I nodded. “Basically. It’s the House version anyway. He had George Brown propose it. Sherry Boehlert is one of the co-sponsors.” Maybe I could deflect any wrath by throwing Sherry under the bus.
Newt looked like he was sucking a lemon as I said that, so maybe that wasn’t a great line of thought. “That’s really a Democratic bill, Carl. It would be best if you took your name off of it.”
“It’s a bill that is going to pass, so maybe it would be good to get my name on it,” I countered.
He shook his head. “I don’t think so. You know that Minority Leader Michel and I are working to build a Republican majority, right? Neither of us thinks that successful Democratic legislation will be conducive to that. We’d rather wait until we returned to power to do these things.”
Well, that was blunt enough. The massive Congressional gridlock that characterized Washington from about 2008 on really got its start twenty years prior, under the Gingrich reign over the Republican Party. Strategy meant nothing, tactics meant everything. It was a beggar thy neighbor, scorched earth approach to legislation. Better that nothing get done than that anything bipartisan might get accomplished. The only way this actually works, though is when one party has an unassailable hold on both houses and the Presidency. Under any other circumstances it just makes for not much action and really bad blood.
I nodded in understanding, but countered, “Newt, this is an important bill, and it will have consequences that will benefit the Republican Party as well. We should be supporting this bill.”
“Explain how this will benefit us.”
“Are you aware of exactly what this bill does? In a nutshell, it opens up existing government computer networks and allows them to be expanded on. In effect it is privatizing the existing government networks. We’re in favor of privatizing. There will be a lot of money made from this.”
That made Newt wake up. He sat upright and looked at me hard. “Computer companies are going to buy this?”
“Probably not, but the phone companies will.”
“I’m not convinced,” he told me.
“Let me put it another way. Al Gore is taking to calling this thing the ‘Information Superhighway’, right? Have you ever heard of a highway that didn’t need construction? I would think you’d be interested in figuring out how to regulate and control that construction.” Regulate and control — in other words, get money from the companies building the highway so that the construction would be regulated and controlled the way they wanted.
Newt gave me a noncommittal grunt at that, and I could see the wheels whirling inside his head. I pushed in a different fashion. “Here’s another thing to think about. You don’t want Al Gore claiming he built the Information Superhighway, do you?”
“That’s why I’m meeting with you,” he said tersely.
“Well, you’ve heard that when somebody hands you lemons, make lemonade. This bill is going to pass, that’s a given. You can’t stop it. Make some lemonade. Remember, I’m actually a mathematician. I have a doctorate in applied mathematics and my thesis was on computer networking. If Al Gore starts saying he’s building the Information Superhighway, trot me out. I wrote the blueprints!”
Gingrich’s eyes popped open at that. He grumbled some more at me, but let me out. I don’t know if I was first on his list or last, but I knew he wouldn’t let it go. A couple of other Republicans were going to co-sponsor it as well, Steve Schiff of New Mexico, and my fellow Marylander, Wayne Gilchrest.
By the end of April I was officially listed as a co-sponsor of the bill, which was reported out of the Science Committee mid-May. From there it had to go to the Senate to be sorted out with the joint committee, to make the wording match what was reported out of the Senate Commerce Committee. It was just a matter of time after that. The Democrats had a solid majority of both the House and the Senate, and this thing wouldn’t even be brought up to a counted vote. A voice vote would be good in both houses. It’s like I told Newt Gingrich, this thing was going to pass no matter what.
Also, by the end of April, most of the troops in the Gulf were coming home. I got a call from the USO and Mindy set me up with a room down in Fayetteville. I flew down for a few days and helped host a ‘Welcome Back!’ party. No, I didn’t give any speeches, or at least not too many, but I did talk to the generals and colonels commanding the division and the brigades and attached battalions. I also left my business cards. Little Captain Buckman had left home and grown up. If the 82nd needed help in Washington, they now had their own pet Congressman.