“An amazing tale,” said Pilate.
“Oh, but it’s not finished yet,” said Caligula. “I almost lost my Agrippa. In one false move he nearly ruined the game. One day he and I were out driving on Capri, and, thinking no one could hear us, he said, ‘You know, Gaius, I wish to God Tiberius would soon go off the stage and leave the government to you. You’re so much more worthy of it.’ I smiled, but thank Jupiter, I said nothing! Because the chariot driver overheard us.”
“The damnable Eutychus,” Agrippa muttered.
“Well, he told Tiberius about the comment one afternoon when he was being carried around his hippodrome in a litter. Grandfather pointed to Agrippa in a rage and told Macro, ‘Arrest that man.’ Macro, who hadn’t heard the charge, was bewildered, not knowing whom to arrest. When the litter rounded the track a second time, Grandfather was nettled to see Agrippa still standing there. ‘Him, Macro, seize him!” he said. ‘Whom?’ asked Macro. ‘Agrippa, you dunce.’”
“It was a long six months in prison, Gaius,” Agrippa commented. “But the worst of it was not knowing it would be just six months until Tiberius died. For a while, I think, he had in mind to have me pitched off the cliffs of Capri.”
“Why not? You’d committed maiestas, you know. But then came the great day at Misenum. Macro told me you were there, Pilate.”
“Yes, Princeps. I wanted him to arrange my hearing before Tiberius. I had no idea—”
“Yes, well, do you know what I did after Grandfather died?”
“You released Agrippa,” Pilate humored.
“Not just released him. I welcomed him into the palace with open arms. I had his shaggy hair cut and presented him with a new wardrobe.”
“Far more than that, dear friend,” smiled Agrippa. “In a symbolism which must have drawn tears from the gods, you presented me with a chain of gold, equal in size to the iron fetters which had bound me in prison. And then you put a diadem on my head.”
Pilate was becoming ill at the touching affection, but he dared do nothing more than smile agreeably. The power which the mature Agrippa exercised over the impressionable young emperor was ominous.
“You realize the significance of the diadem, Pilate?” asked Caligula.
“The symbol of royalty?”
“Exactly. I have the honor to present to you Herod Agrippa I, the new king of Gaulanitis, Trachonitis, and Batanea.”
“Philip’s former tetrarchy? I thought it was now part of Syria.”
“Was, Pilate.”
“My heartiest congratulations, King Agrippa.”
Agrippa nodded briefly.
“Yes,” Caligula added, “and we may well increase his territory. Rome has tried prefects in Judea…without a great deal of success. It may take a Jew, or a part Jew like Agrippa, to govern a nation of Jews. At any rate, if our new prefect Marullus doesn’t work out, Agrippa will succeed him also in Judea. The last time that province was well governed was under his grandfather Herod the Great.”
Pilate swallowed the insult—he had no choice—and then shifted the conversation. “Marullus is replacing Vitellius’s man Marcellus?” he asked.
“Yes. Of course. Vitellius has tried to endear himself to the Jews by a whole series of changes, but I’m not sure of them. You know that he dismissed your friend Joseph Caiaphas from the high priesthood?”
It was news to Pilate. “What about Vitellius’s war in Antipas’s behalf against King Aretas?” he asked.
“That stopped the moment I acceded to the principate. Antipas is now Agrippa’s rival in Palestine. I didn’t want Roman legions used to support the competitor of my closest friend.”
A gratifying morsel of information, thought Pilate.
By now they had finished lunch. Pilate was about to excuse himself from the palace when Caligula asked, point-blank, “Tell me, Pilate, do you think you have any future in Roman government? How and where would you like to serve the Empire next?”
“I’m at your disposal of course, Princeps. But I’d like to take an extended vacation before assuming any new post.”
“I think you should. How old a man are you?”
“Almost fifty.”
“You might consider retirement, then. No, I really don’t think Rome can use your services in the future, Pilate. Certainly you did nothing worthy of exile or death, but Agrippa has given me a full report of your decade in Judea. There were many instances of tactlessness. Forethought, diplomacy, sensitivity, and skill were missing on numerous occasions. Of course, some things you did very well. Taxes were collected regularly; you kept the peace; Caesarea was well administered. The Tiberiéum, the aqueduct, and other constructions were well conceived. But you failed in other matters. The standards and the shields affairs were silly. Perhaps Thallus was right about the Samaritans being pacified without bloodshed. Possibly such frictions were unavoidable and you couldn’t help it. You’re not a Jew—we Romans do have that handicap—and you did govern as well, I suppose, as any of our prefects so far. That much should be said.”
Pilate cast a not-so-friendly glance at Agrippa, and Caligula caught it.
“No, Pilate. Don’t think unkindly of Agrippa as some kind of spy who observed you the whole time. He admitted to me that he reflected the Jewish viewpoint in commenting on your administration. He also spoke in your behalf after the hearing this morning.”
They reached the door of the palace. Caligula extended his hand and said, “So, Pontius Pilatus, your career for the state is concluded. Rome thanks you. And you’ll receive the usual government pension, of course.”
Pilate was trying to make as graceful an exit as possible under the circumstances when he saw Agrippa whisper something to Caligula. The emperor nodded his head.
“It’s time for the baths,” said Agrippa. “Might I accompany you, Pilate?”
The very last thing Pilate wanted to do that afternoon was to visit the baths with Herod Agrippa. But a king had made the request. He was in no position to refuse.
Their litter went several blocks north up the Via Lata, then west to the Baths of Agrippa. As they were deposited, Agrippa dropped the pleasantry. “I’ve always thought these baths especially well named.”
Pilate ignored the bad humor.
“But Pilate, don’t you think it a bit of irony that you, who have judged the Jews for so many years, should finally be judged by one? Gaius virtually gave me full sway in determining your fate. And even if you won’t believe it, I could have given the princeps a worse accounting of your administration in Judea. I can show you letters from the Pharisees which pleaded for your exile.”
“Why?” Pilate retorted angrily. “You know that would’ve been unjustified.”
“Simply because the Pharisees reject any non-Jewish government. So if it could be demonstrated that a Roman is just not able to govern Jews, then the emperor might make another arrangement. You, of course, as the latest example, were dispensable in the interests of that cause.”
“Do you share that viewpoint?”
“Partially. Which is why I had to expose some of your foibles. I concur in the thought that any Roman is ipso facto a poor governor of Jews. You just don’t know enough about us to handle us correctly.”
By this time they had stripped and were swimming about in a section of the cool bath reserved for Roman officials. Then they shifted to the warm mists of the tepidarium before moving on to the steamy vapors of the hot baths.