"I don't have it, Nick, popular opinion to the contrary notwithstanding. I own a number of income properties, and the rentals enable me to live quite well by Pottsville standards. But they'd bring very little at a sale. Certainly not enough to support two people for the rest of their lives, let alone assuage the wounded feelings of a wife like yours."
I hardly knew what to say to that. Maybe, well, maybe my feelings was kind of hurt. Because I knew just about as much about the property she owned as she did, and I knew she was a lot better off than she pretended.
She just didn't want to get things squared up and go off with me. Or just run away with me like any woman should if she was really in love with a fella. But it was her money, so what the heck could I do about it?
Amy picked up my hand and put it on one of her breasts. She squeezed it, trying to press it into her flesh, but I didn't help her none, and finally she pushed it away.
"All right, Nick," she said. "I'll tell you the real reason I won't go away with you."
I said to never mind, I wouldn't want to trouble her none, and she snapped for me not to dare to be rude to her. "Don't you dare, Nicholas Corey! I love you-at least, it seems to be love to me-and because I do, I'm willing to accept something that I never thought I could accept. But don't you be rude to me, or I might change. I might cease to love a man who I know is a murderer!"
17
I didn't say anything for quite a spell; just lay still where I was wondering where that violin music had gone to and why I couldn't smell the perfume no more.
Finally, I said, "Just what are you talking about, Amy?" And I was just a little relieved when she told me, just a little, because it could have been a lot worse.
"I'm talking about those two men you killed. Those, well, pimps is the word, I believe."
"Pimps?" I said. "What pimps?"
"Stop it, Nick. My reference is to a certain night when you and I returned to Pottsville on the same train. Yes, I know you didn't see me, but I was on it. I was curious as to why you'd be going to the river at that time of night, dressed in your very best clothes, so I followed you…"
"Now listen," I said. "You couldn't've followed me wherever I went. It was doggoned dark that night that-"
"It was very dark for you, Nick. For a man who's never been able to see well at night. But I don't suffer from that handicap. I followed you quite easily, and I saw you quite clearly when you killed those two men."
Well…
At least it was better than her knowing I'd killed the other two. It didn't tie me up with Rose in a way that I couldn't very well get out of. Which Amy would have known was the case if she knew I'd killed Tom Hauck. And which was still the case even if Amy didn't know about it.
For a minute or two, I almost wished I was running off with Rose and thirty thousand dollars plus, and t'heck with Amy. But my thinking that was just almost and I didn't even almost it very long. Rose just naturally took too much out of a fella, she was too demandin' and possessive, and she didn't have much of anything to give him back. She was one heck of a lot of woman, but when you'd said that you'd said it all. A lot of woman but a god-danged flighty one. A woman who was apt to lose her head just when she needed it most, like she had with Uncle John.
I rolled over and took Amy into my arms. She swam up against me for a moment, pressing every soft warm inch of herself again me, and then she kind of moaned and pulled away.
"Why did you do it, Nick? I told you I'd accepted it, and I have, but-why, darling? Make me understand why! I never thought you could kill anyone."
"I never thought I could neither," I said. "And I can't rightly say why! did it. They were just one more god-dang thing I didn't like, that I particularly didn't like. I'd been letting them go, like I let so many things go, and finally I thought, well, I didn't have to. There were a lot of things, most things, that I couldn't do nothing about. But I could do something about them, an' finally… finally I did something."
Amy stared at me, a little frown working up on her face. I gave her a pat on the bottom, and kissed her again.
"T'tell the truth, honey," I went on, "I really felt like I was doing the right thing for them fellas. They weren't no good to themselves nor nobody else and they must've known it, like anyone would know a thing like that. So I was doing 'em a pure kindness by fixing it so they wouldn't have to go on livin'."
"I see," Amy said. "I see. And do you also feel you'd be doing Ken Lacey a pure kindness if you kept him from going on living?"
"Him especially," I said. "A fella that mocks his friends, that hurts people just because he's able to hurt 'em-Ken Lacey! " I said. "What do you know about him?"
"Only one thing, Nick. All I know is that you somehow seem to have arranged things so that Sheriff Lacey will be blamed for the two murders that you committed."
I swallowed, and said I just didn't know how she figured that. "It sure ain't my fault if Ken comes down here an' gets drunk, and pops off all over town about what a tough fella he is. I figure that if a fella wants to get all the glory out of braggin', he has to take the blame along with it."
"I don't figure that way, Nick. I won't allow you to do it."
"But, booky," I said. "Why not, Amy? What's Ken to you, anyways?"
"He's a man who may be falsely convicted of murder."
"But-but I just don't understand," I said. "If you don't mind about me killin' them two pimps, why…"
"You haven't been listening, Nick. I mind about them very much. But I had no way of knowing that you were going to kill them. In the case of Sheriff Lacey, I do know your plans, and if I allowed you to carry them Out I'd be as guilty as you are."
"But"-I hesitated-"what if I just can't help myself, Amy? What if it's him or me?"
"Then, I'd be very sorry, Nick. It would have to be you. But that circumstance isn't likely to arise, is it? There's no way you can be incriminated?"
"Well, no," I said. "I can't think of none offhand. For that matter, there's a good chance them bodies will never be found."
"Well, then?"
"Well… god-dang it, Amy, it'd be a lot better to let things go like I planned!" I said. "A whole lot better. Why, if you knew that god-danged Ken Lacey like I do, some of the mean things he's done-"
"No, Nick. Absolutely, no."
"But, doggone it-!"
"No."
"Now, you looky here, Amy," I said. "It just don't look to me like you're in any position to be givin' orders. You got guilty knowledge, like they say in the courts. You know I killed those fellas an' you didn't say nothin' about it, so if you try to do it later you're incriminatin' yourself."
"I know that," Amy nodded evenly. "But I'd still do it, Nick. I'm sure you know I would."
"But-"
But I did know she'd do it, even if it got her hanged. So there just wasn't anything more to say on the subject.
I looked at her, with her hair spilled out on the pillows and the warmth of her body warming mine. And I thought, god-dang, if this ain't a heck of a way to be in bed with a pretty woman. The two of you arguing about murder, and threatening each other, when you're supposed to be in love and you could be doing something pretty nice. And then I thought, well, maybe it ain't so strange after all. Maybe it's like this with most people, everyone doing pretty much the same thing except in a different way. And all the time they're holding heaven in their hands.