“Sydney?”
“Don’t,” she said.
“He lied to you.”
Sitting back on her legs, she stared at her sister. “Yes, Jason had lied to me.” She forced a laugh, wiping at her tears with angry movements. “He’d lied to me, and the last four weeks had been the best of my fucking life. How ridiculous is that, huh? I can’t even have a great couple of weeks without someone lying to me.”
Scrubbing the floor, Sydney couldn’t stop crying. Her tears were making her so damn angry. She should have seen this coming.
“Was it serious?” Dawn asked, stopping her from scrubbing by placing her hand over hers.
Pausing, she took a breath in order to compose herself. “He told me he loved me, and I loved him. God, Dawn, I love him.” She patted her chest where it hurt the most. “It was all lies.”
“I didn’t know.”
“No, but you didn’t give him a chance either, did you? You didn’t give him the option of telling me the truth. You just had to put the fire out.” She threw the cloth into the bucket, then made her way back into her kitchen. Sydney cleaned the bowl out, then filled it with more water. She didn’t feel better. She felt like crap, worse than crap, if that was even possible.
“I’m sorry,” Dawn said.
“Are you? I mean are you really sorry, or are you just saying it because you think that’s what I want to hear?”
“Sydney, I was worried about you. He’d lied and cheated.”
“No, he hadn’t cheated on me.” Sydney believed him on that. He’d been too insatiable.
“Whatever, he’s a porn star. There’s no way you can have a relationship with him.”
“Why not? He’s been talking about getting out of the business.” Sydney stopped as she started to think of the conversations they’d had together over the past couple of weeks. Had everything Jason talked about really been about him?
“You can’t be serious.”
“What do I have to lose? I’m not part of a reputable bank, or agency. I pack fucking hampers and bake fucking cakes, Dawn. I don’t matter to anyone or anything.”
“You matter to me.”
“And I thought I mattered to him, but I guess that doesn’t matter.” Pressing a palm to her temple, Sydney’s head was starting to really hurt. She needed her sister to leave. “Go away,” she said. They’d grown up together. Dawn should know by now not to fight with her.
“I don’t think I should go.”
“And I don’t think you should be here. It’s bad enough that you were here when everything escalated. I don’t want you here right now. I want to break down without your company.”
“He’s not worth it.”
“I was in love with him!” She screamed each word to be heard over whatever crap was going on inside Dawn’s head. “I was in love with him. I still am in love with him. For the sake of our friendship, get out.”
She faced her sister, letting Dawn see that she wasn’t in the mood to fight with her. Dawn placed the cloth she had in her hand down on the counter.
“Okay, I’ll, erm, I’ll see myself out.”
“You do that.”
Dawn made her way to the door as Sydney went back out to clean up the mess.
“I love you, Sydney.”
Closing her eyes, she didn’t say the words back. In that moment, she couldn’t bring herself to say anything.
Once the door closed, she finished cleaning away all the mess before washing the whole of the kitchen, scrubbing from top to bottom.
By the time she took a shower and settled on her bed, she was exhausted. Her exhaustion didn’t stop her tears though. She touched the bed where he’d slept a couple of nights ago.
Placing her palm on her pillow, she saw his beautiful smile in her mind, and how happy she’d been. Four weeks together, and she’d fallen in love with him. Jason had changed her in ways she hadn’t thought was possible.
Tucking her hand under her cheek, she stared at the side of her empty bed, wondering what the hell she was supposed to do. Jason had lied, and yet she knew part of what he said had to be the truth. He wasn’t a bad person.
“Why did you do it?” she asked, not expecting an answer. It was an empty bed. She only wished that her heart wouldn’t be as empty. He’d crashed into her life, and she didn’t know what to do with what he’d left behind.
Chapter Nine
One week later
Jason stared at his reflection on set for his first scene in over a month. He was so pissed off and angry with his life. This was the first time he’d been out of his house since Sydney kicked him out of hers. Richard had been to see him every single day since, and from the moment he woke up, to the moment he’d crashed, he’d been drunk as a fucking skunk. He’d bought the local liquor store out of booze, and he’d drunk the fucking lot.
Yesterday, he’d been about to leave his studio apartment in a pair of pajama bottoms when Richard body tackled him, dumping his ass in the shower. Cold water had rained down on his ass for a good hour, and Richard hadn’t allowed him to leave. He’d been so pissed off, but Richard had pulled him out of the shit and woke him up.
“How are you feeling?” Richard asked, coming into the room, and bringing Jason out of his thoughts.
“Like shit. My head is pounding.”
“You drank enough to sink a fucking ship. You’ve not exactly been yourself for the past couple of days.”
“I miss her, Richard.”
“I know.”
“No, I really miss her. She’s not the kind of woman you’re ever going to forget.”
Richard didn’t say anything. He closed the door and sat down on the sofa. “What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know. She’s lost to me forever. I’m not going to get a chance to be with her,” Jason said.
Tears filled his eyes, and he wiped them away before they had the chance to fall.
“Nothing is lost to you unless you give it up, Jason.”
“I can’t go back to her. She’ll never trust me, and I don’t blame her.” Jason stood up. There was no point in sitting around waiting for something to happen. He may as well just get ready, and deal with the shit that was coming his way.
“Where are you going?”
“On set. Deep is waiting, right?”
“Yes.”
Removing his robe, he made his way on set. His dick was flaccid, and he couldn’t get it up. He was hoping Deep’s expert lips would get a rise out of him. It was pitiful how he was handling the shit that was going on in his life.
Wiping at his brow, he made his way toward the set. Several of the cameramen and artists smiled his way. He nodded at them, refusing to become mean even though he hated being here.
Deep was already on set, smiling and winking at some of the men who’d be fucking her that day. Jason was lucky he was second in line. He stood behind Steve who’d been working the camera for the past eight years.
“You okay, man?” Steve asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“The cameras are going to be rolling. You’re going to need to step back a foot.”
Jason did as he was instructed and watched the show from afar. Keeping his gaze on the screen, he watched as the director shouted “action” once everyone got into position. Deep was receiving mail today, only she’d be the one fucking the mailman for her first shoot.
He stood for the next hour as Deep took Dwayne, another porn star, into her home, and sucked the living shit out of his cock. There was no holding back, and she went down on him, swallowing to his balls. Nothing happened to Jason’s dick. He wasn’t hard at all.
Dwayne finally pulled out of her mouth, only to turn her over the sofa, and start fucking her roughly from behind.
“That’s right, baby, fuck my pussy, make it hurt real good.”